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Remembering 'The Mother' & Sri Aurobindo - experiences shared by Richard Pearson, Narad, Bhaga, Francois Gautier, Prof. Arabinda Basu, Varadharajan, Dr. Beena R. Nayak, Dr. Sushil ...

Blessed are those

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The Mother

Remembering 'The Mother' & Sri Aurobindo - experiences shared by Richard Pearson, Narad, Bhaga, Francois Gautier, Prof. Arabinda Basu, Varadharajan, Dr. Beena R. Nayak, Dr. Sushil ...

Misc books based on The Mother's writings, talks or guidance Blessed are those 190 pages 2015 Edition
English
 PDF     The Mother : Contact  Auroville


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Remembering

Sweet Mother and Sri Aurobindo


Blessed are those...

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This compilation is brought out as a commemoration of 100'h Anniversary of the first meeting of the Mother and Sri Aurobindo.

Our acknowledgements to Sri Aurobindo Ashram Trust, Puducherry for their permission to use extracts from their publications

Copyright : Sri Aurobindo International Institute of Educational Research, Auroville Foundation, Auroville

Published by

Remembering the Mother Programme Team, Sri Aurobindo International Institute of Educational Research, Auroville with a grant from the Ministry of Human Resource Development, Government of India.

Year 2014-15

Typeset and printed at -

Kamban Offset Printers

Puducherry.

Phone : 0413-2359587



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Foreword

LEAPING TO THE FUTURE

Our sweet Mother has written three beautiful plays which give meaningful pointers to integral yoga. The third play, The Ascent to Truth, has a sub-title: 'A Dream of Life'. The play is a symbolic representation of the supreme need for perseverance. A group of people have come together "to find the truth". They have to ascend a mountain to get at it. There are seven stages in this ascent. One by one they fall back. The first to do is the Philanthropist as he cannot give up his attachment to the external world. At the sixth stage even the Ascetic decides to pitch his tent and not move further. He has gained personal salvation and so why should he worry about going on and on?

"In the course of our ascent I have discovered my true being, my true Self. I have become one with the Eternal and nothing else exists for me, nothing else is necessary. All that is not That is illusory, worthless. So I consider that I have reached the end of the path... And here is a sublime and solitary spot, a place that is truly favourable to the life I shall lead from now on. I shall live here in perfect contemplation, far from earth and men, free at last from the need to live."

The two Aspirants - a Boy and a Girl - alone reach the summit which is a presence of Truth. There is no space except that on which their feet rests. It is a surrealistic situation. They had reached the limits of personal effort. Together they leap forward with complete faith, not giving way to doubt or fear. Such total surrender as theirs has activated the wings of Grace which leads them to the land of Realisation. The play closes with the Girl's spontaneous utterance: "What marvellous splendour! Now we have only to learn to live the new life."

The Mother was no arm-chair philosopher. She set in motion the building of Auroville to realize the Future of "marvelous splendour" in concrete terms. She was always thinking of the Future. Navajata Bhaiji writes:


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"A few days before She retired, I told Her that it had come to me in meditation that we should have a world magazine in all languages. She nodded, and Champaklal gave Her a paper and She wrote down, the Next Future, and then asked for another paper and wrote in French, Le Prochain Avenir."

Incidentally, the epigraph chosen for this book is the Mother's 1971 message: "Blessed are those who take a leap towards the future." And so the aspirants came to the Ashram and the Auroville, literally leaping from the mountain of material life into the unknown, as the Boy and the Girl do in The Ascent to Truth. Some came on an impulse, a few were directed by their inner voice to take the plunge, others were simply born in the Aurobindonian atmosphere like Arabinda Basu. In the twentieth century world of cut-throat competition to go on and on and up and up, these chosen few preferred to set themselves sail on boats that had nothing to hold them up except total surrender. The wings of Grace did not abandon them, and a few of them have chosen to tell their tale. Spiritual life is never smooth-sailing but tenacity of purpose can overcome any obstruction. And so it has been with many of the persons who have documented their personal experiences. A few, such records have been brought together in this volume. They·gently point out the pathways they chose to reach their goal which was the creative and comforting world of the Divine Mother.

Most of the records are immediate responses from the hearts touched by the awe and ecstasy of having drawn close to the Divine in a human form. As when Bhaga describes the Aspiration community in 1973. But the physical conditions just did not matter. This was an altogether rarefied atmosphere based on the soul's strength where one could receive the Mahasamadhi of the Mother with equanimity, a feeling of being surrounded by a blissful light. All those who came in contact with the Mother achieved their own reception of this light in varied ways. It could be Clare receiving guidance for a conscious conception, the gentle withdrawal of Dr. Susil Pani's father, Francois Gautier getting "frozen" changing his life totally or Kireet Joshi seeing in Her an


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icon of "unsurpassable kindness." Just as no two persons experienced the Mother's presence in an identical manner, no two entries in this loving homage appear straight-jacketed. There is a joyous abandon in their style. There are reminiscences, interviews, passing thoughts, memories recollected in tranquility or recollected to overcome some personal crisis. But always a new angle, a new pitch.

Andre Morisset takes us back to the Mother's early days in Paris with a charming introduction when he was taken to his great-grandmother Mirra Ismalun in Lausanne. Mme. Ismalun asks the little child: "Good morning, my little Andre, you find me very old, do you not?" The poor child replies innocently: "Oh! Oui!" ("Oh! Yes!"). That is how the editors have made this collection trembling on the pin-point of earthly life that aspires towards the transformed state of divine living. Humdrum life and spirituality intermingle as each aspirant soul tries to climb up to God, with the help of this Golden Ladder. This is why neither Her age, nor pain that laid siege on the Mother in her last years on earth could shake the faith and firm tread of the aspirant community. No unbelief clouds us as we read the varied experiences. Thus Narad: "Each time I went to see Mother I had the same experience of entering a room without walls." And Loretta as she kneels down in front of Mother in 1972:

"My earlier impression of age and frailty disappeared. Mother was the youngest person I ever saw. She was shining as though there was a light inside Her, coming through Her skin, which was as white and smooth as a baby's. She looked extremely alive. Her blue eyes were very alive and bright. There was an atmosphere of clarity and consciousness around her."

The editors have structured the book in such a way that we get to have a complete picture of aspiration and acceptance, from almost the beginning to the ongoing construction of the Auroville, transforming dreams to realities. While memories from 2005 onwards come from fifteen devotees, most of whom are still active in serving the vision of the Mother which is concretized as the


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Auroville, the earlier days of the Ashram are brought to us by twelve well-known Aurobindonians like Amrita and Dmitri. We even get to have glimpses of Sri Aurobindo thanks to early comers to Pondicherry like my father K.R. Srinivasa Iyengar and Arabinda Basu. The gentle manner in which the Mother guided Her children, as when She asked Dilip Kumar Roy a question and answered it too: "Why do you think we are here? To please Sri Aurobindo." That is sadhana! Aravinda Basu explains the contours of this sadhana in detail:

"... the most difficult thing is to please Sri Aurobindo. Every fibre of your being has to be surrendered - completely, no reserve, nothing held back. Give, give, give."

There is never a dull moment in this compilation which gives several authentic visionary experiences of the disciples who are engaged in works and are learning about integral yoga, with unswerving devotion to Sri Aurobindo and the Mother. So, in effect, these recollections are not of a past but recordations of a continuing present And thus they do become "the angel of the way" revealed to us by Sri Aurobindo:

"... love leading to perfect knowledge brings the infinite and absolute union. Such love is not inconsistent with, but rather throws itself with joy into divine works; for it loves God and is one with him in all his being, and therefore in all beings, and to work for the world is then to feel and fulfil multitudinously one's love for God. This is the trinity of our powers, the union of all three in God to which we arrive when we start on our journey by the path of devotion with Love for the Angel of the Way to find in the ecstasy of the divine delight of the All-Lover's being the fulfilment of ours, its secure home and blissful abiding-place and the centre of its universal radiation. "

The third part seeks to explain the divine experiment at Auroville. Thus Nolini Kanta Gupta writing on the "Mother's Creation." takes us beyond the City of Dawn:

"The Mother's work encompasses the whole world; it aims at a transcendence taking up the young and old, the men and women


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of the Ashram as well as the human race.... How various are the elements which constitute this earthly life, our institution will be a picture of that, a laboratory, as it were, for new creation..."

The work concludes with excerpts from the Mother's nectarean messages and Sri Aurobindo's Savitri, relating all this with the experience indicated in Isha Upanishad. All the writings gathered here personify the "angel of the way", bhakti. One just holds hands with these angels in a meditative mood and then life moves onwards softly, smoothly, sweetly. We can also read choice messages of the Mother that give practical guidance for day-to-day living. Though Auroville-centric, the book is about the larger community of seekers who had come into the aegis of the Aurobindonian world. I am infinitely grateful to the compilers of Blessed are those... for giving me the privilege of being associated with it. All I can say is to salute these pilgrims of infinity and say, "I am blessed."

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Prema Nandakumar


Mudhal Tirumaligai

152/91, South Chitrai Street

SRIRANGAM-620006

1.1.2015




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Introduction

With Gratitude

We Are All Blessed. The remembrances published as 'Darshan' in 2005-06 are succeeded by the present collection of remembrances in 2014-15 and are titled "Blessed are those ..." The Title has been taken from the Mother's message for 1971 "Blessed are those who take a leap towards the Future". The Mother also wrote that 1971 is "A sweet year".

Remembering the Mother and Sri Aurobindo is always sweet. As dawn is succeeded by a greater dawn, each remembrance becomes sweeter and sweeter. Absorbing the influences of the centenary of the first meeting of the Mother and Sri Aurobindo (1914-2014) ,and going towards the 60th anniversary of the first Manifestation of Supermind (1956-2016), and heralding Golden Jubilee of the Inauguration of Auroville (1968 -2018 ), we are on the threshold of greater times to come.

Part I of this book is a collection of reminiscences, mostly from the Residents of Auroville and the rest from those deeply connected with it. Part II has remembrances of the early sadhaks of the Ashram who directly worked with the Mother. For them doing Auroville work is doing the Mother's yoga. We salute also all the unsung heroes who dedicated their works silently. Part III is dedicated to the remembrances of pioneers in Auroville mostly collected from publications, their true significance is explained by a quote from Nolini Kanta Gupta at the beginning of this part. And we conclude with a chapter projecting the essence of the Yoga of our Masters i.e., their work for bringing down the Supermind and their Vision of the Future. There is an interesting narration on supermind as experienced by Dr. Michael Miovic when meditated in the inner chamber of Matrimandir in 1997, the 125th birth anniversary year of Sri Aurobindo.


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After 1973, it is left to us to ask, aspire, strive, know, experience and attain that stage of yoga towards spiritual progress. Though we could not record the talks, Rama Narayana and Buvanasundari have written and given their sharing with joy. Sunandaben, Anu Purani, Shoba Mitra were actively participating in Auroville from earlier times and are inspiration for early birds. We also remember with joy Sunandaben sharing her sweet moments with Mother with Arulvazhi children and Muthulakshmi taking notes. Our elder brother, Richard Pearson is there too and Kailasben with prayer on all our behalf.

In "The Virtues" tale, the Mother mentions "Gratitude" as the youngest virtue. We human beings have to cultivate that virtue more and more. Our heartfelt grateful thanks to all participants.

Our thanks go to Dr. Beena R.Nayak, who was the initiator, organizer and conductor during the first phase of the Remembrances meetings and for her continued support thereafter, to Patricia for collecting and providing the original recordings, to Rajasoundari for transcribing most of the audio recordings and making typed copies of some published works, assisting in all other connected works with devotion and to the staff of Savitribhavan led by Shraddhavan for their continued and committed support.

We thank Jothi Charles for reviewing all the transcripts and typed text and editing wherever essential. We appreciate his suggestions for titles, shortening of some articles and profiles and for transcribing Dr. Kireet Joshi's interview. We thank R. Ganesh, M. Manimaran, M. Velmurugan and M. Muthukumari. We thank Kamban offset printers for typesetting and printing.

On 6-11-06, Dr. Prema Nandakumar wrote about "Darshan", "..An appropriate title for it gives us Darshan of the Mother and also explains the core elements of the Aurobindonian Darsana. It is not easy to accept a way of life that takes you away completely from the familiar, but launching oneself on an ocean towards an unknown destination is the mark of a hero. I salute all of - heroic precursors of a marvelous Dawn...


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But when the Mother is our leader, we should not worry. With affection, Prema" This time we are privileged to have her foreword for this venture, which is a remembrance by itself. "What marvellous splendour! Now we have only to learn to live the new life."

Varadharajan and Syamala

Prarthna, Auroville

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The Meeting (Dr. Beena R. Nayak)

- Dr. Beena R. Nayak

From Kashi with gangajal, the sangha, to complete the yatra started for Rameshwaram, guarding the sacred water for abhisheka. In a burning, fiery track southwards, the sangha panted in the hot dusty plains where even the earth heaved sighs in vapors.

I and the sangha, with scorched faces chanting harinaam labored on with the fierce will, unfazed, to fulfil the yatra. Suddenly, across the road, we found a donkey, dying of thirst, panting, his eyes rolled upwards, as if begging for water.

The lead, chanting harinaam, diverted the sangha making sure, not to stop for this minor obstacle, even a moment. But for one of us, a humble harijan, looked at the poor creature lying in our way, eyes bloodshot, tongue lolling out. The pilgrims cried, "Han Hari" and ran forward, not sparing a glance, not missing a step, in carrying on their holy pilgrimage. The harijan just could not go forward, and taking the head of the poor animal on his lap, slowly, drop by drop, fed the holy water. The donkey, revived by the holy waters, stood up, and with a look of gratitude, went onwards on shaky legs, saved from sure death. Then upon joining the sangha, he was greeted by ironic comments -especially by a wise man, " Lo and behold! Now that your pot of gangajal is emptied into a donkey, what is there to offer at Rameshwaram !"-

The poor man said, bowing his head in humility,

"All I have to offer is my abhishek of tears in repentance".


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Poojalal, one of the poet educators of Sri Aurobindo Ashram, Pondicherry in 1926, published this poem titled ' A Successful Pilgrimage', in his Gujarati poetry collection, 'Parijaat.' He was inspired to write this poem in meter after he read a true story from the famous saint of Maharashrashtra Eknathji. I came across this as I tried to put together words to explain what is this remembering, of the Mother and Sri Aurobindo, that we began in the early 2000s in Auroville. Why? Just as these links of remembering that started from the late 20th century reached to you all in the early part of the 21st century, with the meaning and significance intact, indeed, in the same way as in the remembering, through kirtana, harinaam, remembering in the form of the accounts of those who had met the Mother and Sri Aurobindo, helps bring the experience of the meeting alive. Thus this story, the poem, and the meaning they carry, all become a metaphor -that the Divine is in front of you, the Divine is in all, that the means to the end of a holy pilgrimage or your spiritual journey is remembering; that which you meet on the way, is also that which you seek on the fulfilment of your long, arduous trek. Similarly, through the program of remembering, where we collectively hear from one of us meeting with the Masters, what we experience is the process of searching and finding, of questing and discovering, the recognizing of the essential oneness through the memories of many lives edited to some moments of truth carried forward to that moment of remembering; bringing alive the lost teachings and learning in conscious bursts of recapturing and recreating of timeless moments of truth; those that happened before and those that will happen, in the meeting with the Masters. Again and again and again.

Infinite cycles of going forward, going backward, to uncover more dross covering the gold of that treasure of memories, across time immemorial, across thousands of miles of circumambulation of many lives, searching for that, the gold, the true, needing synthesis of all those vague hints and dusty recall not yet lost in


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the sands of material details, to remember that moment of the meeting of the soul with the Supreme, the learner and the teacher, the child and the Mother. Again and again and again.

Quoting the Gita, Shri Manoj Das Gupta from the Sri Aurobindo Ashram points to the importance of remembering of the message in the divine dialogue between Shri Krishna and Arjuna:

samwadmimadbhutam keshavssrjunayoho

punyam hrishyam cha muhurmuhuhu

(Srimad Bhagwad Gita Ch-18.sh-76.)

"Remembering the wonderful and sacred dialogue, I rejoice again and again and again"

Also, remembering is the act of reliving that experience which signifies the lesson given and cherished and shared with others on the same journey, until it becomes wisdom eternal, an indivisible whole of the Self. In his correspondence with Sri Aurobindo, Nirodda, asks, "Where is the higher Being that I had met with? " The Master replies, "Everything once gained is there and can be regained."

Remembering is this golden key that helps find the lost treasures within one self, symbolizing the mystical finding and losing and finding again, in one's spiritual journey, that often serves as an ignition to jumpstart the moving forward, on a very exhausting journey. Often one finds a fragment and then there is a 'loss' and we need to refind that which is 'lost', as the mind suffers many natural disasters in the long inexplicable travels through the vicissitudes of one's life. As Nirodda says in a poem " ..a deep glimpse of a memory, behind the veil of time, when my soul was with Thee.."

Further, signifying the consolation that we experience on listening to one of these remembering, inciting flames of inspiration that burn the dross of doubts along the way, as those deep-seated golden memories have a transfiguring touch on the resisting cells of hardened sanskaras, old habits,


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"..No more I ask of thee

What I have gained or lost,

What shadow-veils wrap me,

What distance I have crossed,

I feel within my soul

Crowding like gold fires

The hidden scroll,

The word that for thee aspires." (From 'Fingers of Light')

These events of remembering, using speech, language, sound use the process of multiple loops of knowledge, learning and memory creating the necessary wisdom to serve the tripod of Sri Aurobindo's Yoga - towards the essential synthesis, as in the kirtana, japa, harinaam, sumiran and other time honoured traditions of Indian paths of devotion. The speech used to remember the name of the Lord; the sound of the name of the Lord; the rhythms of accompaniments all produce a most complex result of an elevated emotional atmosphere within, rather like the vapors of an incense burning, overcoming even the physical laws of nature. All these form the ritual, the magic, the sacred space where a welcome to the Wonderful happens, of itself, as a natural consequence.

Also, in the Synthesis of Yoga, at several places Sri Aurobindo has said remembering is essential to - the process of surrender of ego, the aspiration to rise above the day-to-day function, the rejection of all that stands in the way - the foundation tripod of this Yoga. Maybe as in the japa, the sound rich with the emotions purified by the memory, connects to the primordial collections of sound stored in the inconscient as of the mother's voice in the child before the birth or, as in the devotee before the separation from the Master happens. Maybe the emotional charge of the heart filled with joy and wonder stored as memories recharges the tired cells to an awakening of an all experience anew. Maybe these links connect the soul once more to the Self as when forgotten memories come alive like a lightning across the terrible lonely dark terrain of the inconscient. Just a moment of truth is needed. A spark across


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the aeons. Thus confirming the knowledge that memory underlies ail learning, the link of remembering, to That, which has no end, no beginning.

The Mother remembered what an old European mystic, Giordano Bruno had to say, while illuminating a point to Huta in the collection of sayings of timeless wisdom, Gems, "..Time is nothing else than uninterrupted succession of the acts of Divine Energy, one of the attributes or one of the workings of the Divine. Space is the extension of this soul.. " The meeting, remembered in the act of sharing with others, is brought alive as a solid fact on the grid point of Time and Space, recharging with the Energy and situating in that Place, putting those who are listening to themselves, onto the timeless voyage once again.

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(Message for the Inauguration of Auroville)

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PART I

CHAPTER-1

From Savitri:

THEN suddenly there rose a sacred stir.

Amid the lifeless silence of the Void

In a solitude and an immensity

A sound came quivering like a loved footfall

Heard in the listening spaces of the soul;

A touch perturbed his fibres with delight.

An Influence had approached the mortal range,

A boundless Heart was near his longing heart,

A mystic Form enveloped his earthly shape.

All at her contact broke from silence 'seal;

Spirit and body thrilled identified,

Linked in the grasp of an unspoken joy;

Mind, members, life were merged in ecstasy.

Intoxicated as with nectarous rain

His nature's passioning stretches flowed to her,

Flashing with lightnings, mad with luminous wine.

All was a limitless sea that heaved to the moon.

A divinising stream possessed his veins,

His body's cells awoke to spirit sense,

Each nerve became a burning thread of joy:

Tissue and flesh partook beatitude.

Alight, the dun unplumbed subconscient caves

Thrilled with the prescience of her longed-for tread

And filled with flickering crests and praying tongues.

Even lost in slumber, mute, inanimate

His very body answered to her power.

The One he worshipped was within him now:


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Flame-pure, ethereal-tressed, a mighty Face

Appeared and lips moved by immortal words;

Lids, Wisdom's leaves, drooped over rapture s orbs.

A marble monument of ponderings, shone

A forehead, sight's crypt, and large like ocean's gaze

Towards Heaven, two tranquil eyes of boundless thought

Looked into man's and saw the god to come...

Book III, Canto 4,The Vision and the Boon pg (334-335)

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"What you are experiencing is the Divine

Mother"

- Bhaga

My own memories with the Mother are of a quite different kind, I imagine, in fact than of most people who have been actually living with Her, at least for some time. I myself came to Auroville in 1972, in a very peculiar state of consciousness. Throughout my childhood I had always been a very mystical type of person. But then when growing up into adult age I had discovered the awful condition of the world and the horrible societies that we have created and the horrible ways we human beings are treating each other most of the time. I was absolutely horrified, scandalized. My whole understanding of God's presence in the world and my entire perception of the Divine collapsed around the end of sixties. I was unable to bear life the way it is now and go on anticipating my own life in that old scene of the world, as it is now, because I couldn't understand what was going on, what the purpose of it was. What the hell was going on? And I couldn't see anymore the Divine, you know, acting in this world. And so I went my fist to the sky and I said, "If you actually exist, you have to explain to me what this is all about. And quickly! Because I'm not going to remain here for long! If I don't know why - first of all why things are the way they are, which is horrible. And second question: how it can be changed? Because if it cannot be changed, I'm not going for it, sorry." So luckily, the Divine doesn't mind an ultimatum although it is not an approach to the Divine that they would recommend you in most religions. Apparently the intensity of the aspiration or of the need is quite enough for the Divine to listen to you and to take you into consideration. So within a few months


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the Divine had sent to me one after the other exactly the right books to make me aware first of all of such key things like consciousness, evolution - things like that, you know, that I couldn't put together yet clearly, but which were correlating like that and indicating something so strongly - and then finally it was "The Life Divine". And I read only the first chapter, and that was it. At last everything made sense, such incredible wonderful sense! And this at once gives fantastic dynamism to the whole thing: instead of having a static world where things are the way they are - things stuck, you know. And the only way out is out, precisely somewhere else, to another dimension. But why is the Earth? Why is the world? Why ascetical life? Nobody had any idea. Some people will even tell you that this is Maya, they don't even exist. Nobody can tell you why there is a Spirit who had invented such a lie. Why do spirits ever get trapped in that? So at last in "The Life Divine", all the answers were there. I think I had the first illumination in my life. Suddenly I saw a kind of innumerable pieces of a gigantic Cosmic Puzzle falling together and together making the fantastic picture of the future towards which we are going. So I just sat down and said to the Divine: "Now, if this is what it is all about, I am staying." And that was a turning point in my life. After that things unfolded quite naturally. I found more books by Sri Aurobindo and I discovered that there was also somebody called the Mother who was part of the overall picture out there in Pondicherry. There was an Ashram something -I had no idea at that time of what an Ashram was or anything, I knew nothing about India. And when I heard that this Auroville was in India -oh, no, no, no, why do I have to go out there to India, why they don't make Auroville in some normal place, somewhere I knew of.

So I came very grumbling to India and when I arrived in Auroville I still had a lot to learn about Integral Yoga. I had understood the big thing: that one has to become conscious again of being the Divine because that was what everyone and everything really is. Because that was all my life was about, but beyond that


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I had not read much at all. The whole Bhakti aspect was something quite (not there). I have had the feelings that the whole openness and feeling of the Divine presence everywhere - in the sky, in the stars, in the little birds and the butterflies and the flowers and all. I was practising only in my mind I had a quite a good mind, but an iron mind built in the Western way, and everything that would come into me, had to come now only through that mind. So I came in that condition to Auroville, as I said, entirely for the yoga that I had started practising already when I was in France. So I was coming to Auroville not exactly to practice yoga but to be part of the collective experiment that Auroville was, which was the plus which made me decide instead of simply continuing my doing the yoga alone in my corner where I was teaching to come here and participate in that collective aspiration which would someday become a whole very beautiful township, shaped like a galaxy.

So when I arrived I knew nothing about the lives of Sri Aurobindo and the Mother as persons, nothing. I arrived on the 2nd of August. On the 15th of August I was very sick with a fever - like many people who arrive, their body has to adapt to the climate. And then it had to be another lady Aurovilian, who was also quite sick in the same Nursing Home but who was an old timer. She told me: "Look, we are on the 15th of August. Today is the darshan day! What? You don't know what adarshan day is? Today is SriAurobindo's birth anniversary. Let's go to the balcony, we might have the chance to see Mother from afar. " And from one corner of that Ashram Nursing Home we leaned and we looked from our small balcony and then there was another street, there I could see a silhouette in the distance on a high balcony. Well, I cannot say frankly it had much effect on me but okay at least I knew what the darshan was. At least I had the beginning of the notion that some beings have so much Divine Presence in them it might be good for you to be near them or see them - that notion was totally absent in my life before.


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And so later on I did have the chance to be at a collective Darshan when Mother would come out at her balcony. This time I was down on the street. That was quite an extraordinary event. There was actually a huge crowd. The streets flooded with kids, street dogs and all and quite noisy. And then suddenly everything silenced. Total silence when that being was standing there for a while and after a while retreating back. And the sheer impact of those few moments was incredible.

Still when I discovered that it was possible to come even closer to the Mother and to be with Her in a personal, individual manner - even if you did not speak, and at that time it was possible to do that for your birthday - I was not really interested. "What do I need to go to see Mother for?"

And then at that time my closest friends in Auroville were a sister and brother, also from France, about my age but who, had been in Auroville since several years. At that time everyone in Auroville was functioning on cycles - no bikes at that time, nothing. And once in a week it was a big outing for us - cycling to Pondicherry and have lunch in a restaurant, which was Indian Coffee House. So the three of us plus another friend - would every week on the same day find each other there and have our lunch there. Then one day I was at a normal rendezvous and I see the sister, I see the other friend but not the brother. So I ask, "Where is he?" and she tells us: "Today is his birthday and so he went to see the Mother." I didn't say a thing about that anymore. And I happened to be sitting with my back to the big entrance door there. Suddenly, without knowing why I start turning around and there he was standing at the entrance door, immobile. It was him but at the same time - I couldn't believe he had light around him. It was as if, peace, a solid peace was emanating from his being. And Peace was there entering Indian Coffee House with him.

Slowly he started walking and came to our table and sat down. He didn't utter a word and I couldn't stop looking at him. It was so strong and so strange - I've never experienced anything like


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that. So when I went home, I was feeling, "Well, this lady, She has quite an effect on people, it seems. Maybe I should go." So I inquired and asked my two friends, "Ok, if I want to go see the Mother for my birthday, what do I have to do?" "Oh, it's so simple: you go to the Ashram, you ask your name to be put on the list." "What?! Even in the Ashram, to see Mother, you have to have lists? What is all that administrative business? I don't want anything to do with lists! Come on! I'm not going to do this! I'm not going to put my name on the list. "And I forgot about it. And then you know, people who are from Europe like me will know if you really don't have the same experience- In Europe birthdays were not a big thing. For most people you don't celebrate it anymore, it is not so important. So I was also not thinking of my birthday at all.

In fact, the birthday came, and I was not even aware of it. Just one day I woke up, I was doing my usual way of things and suddenly I start feeling the need, something pulling me towards the Ashram, towards Pondy. I said, "No, what's happening to me?!" I had to get my cycle and only on my way I realised it was my birthday. So I said, "Ok, I'm meant after all to go to see Mother for my birthday. Ok, let's see what happens." I arrived right at the Ashram - I arrived at the secretary's office - came to the table and the lady there told me, "Oh, today is your birthday. Wonderful! So I assume your name is on the list? What is your name?" "Well, sorry, but my name is not on the list." "Oh, that's the real problem because if your name is not on the list you cannot see the Mother." I was stunned and then I got angry. I must have cried. Nothing doing, I just couldn't go and see the Mother. So in the end I just embarked on my cycle and went home. And I told myself, "Ok, you stop being a stupid little girl. Next year you are going to put your name on this damn list. Don't be a fool, and you'll see what happens." I reassured myself like that and forgot about it.

And my birthday happens to be at the end of February. I had missed my birthday for February 1973, which was my first birthday here, and so I was counting to see Mother for my birthday in


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February 1974. At that time I was living in Aspiration which is more towards the sea. There was a community kitchen but it was used for another purpose and everybody from Aspiration area would for their meals come to the place where "Douceur" and Bakery now are. It was quite a deserted place like almost everything in Auroville at that time but with a big circular hut in the middle of nowhere. In fact it was as usual a dining-room with community kitchen with the kitchen aspect at the back of it. And on the dining-hall side a counter where you had the pile of trays and then the dishes. You serve your food on your tray and you go and sit on the small individual mats around with small tables in front, eat your food out of the tray, then wash everything and go home again. I was always an early bird, so as usual one morning I would arrive for breakfast. As usual I go to the counter with the intention to get my tray and then, just next to the pile of trays there was a slate with something written on it. It read: "Yesterday, 17th November at 7.30 pm the Mother left Her body." Nothing happened to me in my mind, in my emotions - nothing. But I never picked the tray.

Without knowing why I turned around and started walking towards the area just outside of the kitchen where there was a kind of small open garden under the sky. And then the strangest thing happened. Standing there normally with my eyes open, I felt literally that my head was splitting open into two halves - I describe it exactly how it felt. And suddenly what my senses perceived -what my eyes, my ears - all my senses perceived was not anymore the normal world around me. I was actually in an infinite ocean of Light, of total Peace, of total Calm and it was like an immense body of an infinite being. Bliss and Delight that I could feel going through my being, through my body. It was a fantastic experience that I was living. And in the corner of my mind - my mind was shrieking: "Hey, what's happening to you?! Mother just left Her body, and you are in this bliss? Are you going crazy?" And the rest of my being was saying, "Shut up! Shut up!" You know, just enjoying this incredible thing I was experiencing. And then at some point - you know, you loose all sense of time in such experiences


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at the level of my heart I heard a voice, a strong, almost stern voice, more masculine, which was speaking to me, speaking to my inner being and it was telling me: "What you are experiencing now is what we call in India the Divine Mother. And this is what the person who died yesterday embodied upon Earth". And these words imprinted themselves like in gold fire letters in my inmost depths. And then after some more time the strangest thing happened again. It was as if this ocean, unlimited thing around me - it was the only existing reality like the only real thing - started going down. Not going up into some ethereal realm - nope! It went down into the earth and down, and down. And then my eyes would start seeing normal reality again, and my ears would again hear the normal sound around. And I find myself just like before, still standing.

Again no emotion, nothing moving in my brain and again without knowing why I find myself turning around again, going back towards the kitchen. I had no thought of breakfast but when I was close again to that pile of trays only then I saw that on that slate there was an announcement which said: "Those who want to have the last Darshan of the Mother can take the bus which will come at 7.15 (or something) and bring them to the Ashram." And then it hit me. The last Darshan? I'm never going to see Mother for my birthday? This is my last chance. And I could understand the incredible gift I had been given through that experience which was not even wanted, not even desired, not even dreamed of though I needed it so much - it was totally granted. And I'm still trying, you know. All my pride and my mental arrogance had been shattered in one blow by this contact with the true reality of things. So you know I have become totally humble and I knew that I knew nothing - not even what was good for me and what was not good for me and that only the Mother knew. And I knew also that physically there was not enough time. I was in the kitchen and still had to walk back to Aspiration to dress up. How could I be ready in time to take that bus? So inwardly I told Mother, "Ok, you know if it is good for me that I see you, - if it is good, - you do


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it. I cannot possibly hurry." I walked back to my little hut, dressed up and it was the first time in my life I dressed up entirely in white. I was feeling just like a newborn baby. When I was ready I went out and that bus was there. And even that was so strange. Everybody in the bus - all those people from Auroville who have been collected from everywhere - everybody sobbing, sobbing. Most of those people were not like me. They all have had physical contact with the Mother, and they knew Her. It was the blessing of their lives. And now She was gone physically and that contact they wouldn't have anymore. So I could see, you know, I could feel their distress. But I was in a kind of bubble of blessedness, of total peace, of quiet joy, of total trust. And I reached the Ashram and there was a long queue in the streets around which I joined along with everybody else.

And I suddenly found myself downstairs from Mother's room where they have put the bed of the Mother with Her body lying on it. And probably still fresh from the experience of early morning, my subtle eyes, my spiritual eyes, my inner eyes must have remained open somehow. What I saw was not what the photographs on the walls showed, what the people used to see. I saw a body there which was a splendour, a glory of power, of light, of something incredibly beautiful and powerful and a kind of orange mist was there all around it and was the very substance of it. It was so strong, you know, the shock, I just couldn't take it. I fell on my knees and started sobbing and sobbing and sobbing - people had to take me away and put me up on my feet. And I found myself back in the street and immediately went without thinking back into the line. Again my turn came and I arrived in front of Mother's bed and again She gave me so much but it was all spilled out, it was all lost. I just could not remain calm enough. So things happened in the same way again: up, out, and back into the line again. But then during all the time I was in that line again, I prayed to Mother: "Mother, I'm too emotional. Give me your peace. I must be able to receive what you are trying to give me. Give me your peace. Make me able to receive you. Make me able to receive


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you." So I arrived the third time. And that time I could stand there without getting overwhelmed but I was worried - you couldn't stay there, you know, there was always somebody else. I was already looking forward to getting in the line fourth time. And then I felt on me a strange look and I looked up and there was one of the people in the Ashram who had as a duty - you know, there are a bit strong and impressive people who are there when there are big crowds like that, - to make sure everything happens correctly. So this man, an Ashramite (who was on duty like this) was looking at me quite fiercely. He couldn't openly, you know, shout at me but he fiercely said to me: "But I have seen you already! You already came! It's forbidden to come two times!"

I understood that the Divine was telling me through that man: you have got what you needed. This is enough. It is not like a little sweet (that you get second time - things like that) - it is not like that. And also how I had been protected by my ignorance. Because by nature I tend to respect the law and all those things. And if I would have known that it was forbidden to come two times, that would mean definitely that I would not have tried or dared to come. Because I didn't know I was just able to follow my inner instinct and come as many times as was needed for me. And the Divine allowed it to happen. And only the last time that guy noticed me and objected the next time. So I went out feeling happy and so grateful. I noticed on my way out for the first time, all the pictures of the Mother smiled to me, and I knew She must indeed be happy with me.

So this was my first real contact with the Mother. I thank you for listening to me. (a talk in 2005)

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We happy to include here the concluding lines of the poem written by Bhaga herself:

... Mother, Mighty Mother, "death" is no more a must:

Our bodies bathed in the slow blissful Wave

To the Almighty rhythm of the Supreme Lord's Wings,

Our cells as well now are learning Happiness!...


(Bhaga has been living in Auroville for 40 years and is the Founder of Laboratory of Evolution and its Head Researcher.) (http://labofevolution. wordpress. com/author/aurobhaga/)

* * *

Rose of God

Rose of God, vermilion stain on the sapphires of heaven,

Rose of Bliss, fire-sweet, seven-tinged with the ecstasies seven!

Leap up in our heart of humanhood, O miracle, O flame,

Passion-flower of the Nameless, bud of the mystical Name.

Rose of God, great wisdom-bloom on the summits of being,

Rose of Light, immaculate core of the ultimate seeing!

Live in the mind of our earthhood; O golden Mystery, flower,

Sun on the head of the Timeless, guest of the marvelous Hour.

Rose of God, damask force of Infinity, red icon of might.

Rose of Power with thy diamond halo piercing the night!

Ablaze in the will of the mortal, design the wonder of thy plan,

Image of Immortality, outbreak of the Godhead in man.

Rose of God, smitten purple with the incarnate divine Desire,

Rose of Life, crowded with petals, colour's lyre!

Transform the body of the mortal like a sweet and magical rhyme;

Bridge our earthhood and heavenhood, make deathless the children of Time.

Rose of God, like a blush of rapture on Eternity's face,

Rose of Love, ruby depth of all being, fire-passion of Grace!

Arise from the heart of the yearning that sobs in Nature's abyss:

Make earth the home of the Wonderful and life beatitude's kiss.

Sri Aurobindo - collected poems, pg. 584


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A Journey to Conscious Conception (Clare Fanning)

- Clare Fanning

'My best and most intimate work with Mother that She encouraged, protected, guided and blessed began in March 1971 and took two and a half years to accomplish. I will tell this story based on my correspondences with Mother.

Vincenzo, (who came to AV in 1965) took me to meet Mother and sit quietly on the 7th of March, (he had Mother's authority to come to Her room at any time without appointment). After leaving Her room I wrote Her this letter in Pondicherry. March 7, 1971

"Dear Mother, Since a week now I have been having a very strong experience but only when I am alone with Vincenzo. Every day on and off, I feel someone enter the room but when I turned to see who has come in, no one was there. I didn't mention this to him but I was beginning to have some intuitions.

On the fifth day I sensed someone enter the room when Vincenzo turned to look behind him - only to turn around confused. I smiled and said, 'Did you just think someone came into the room? 'Yes.'He replied. Then I told him that I had been experiencing that every day since five days at different times but only when I was alone with him. I said, 'I have been having intuitions and that I think it is someone who wants to be born of us... how did he feel about that?' He said he felt fine but I would have to handle the child-raising the first five years as there was so much work to be done. He also said the doctors in France had done tests once and said they thought he could not have children. I said I would write to you to have clear guidance. "


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"I was not expecting to think of having a child as I had never lived with a man before coming to Auroville and I would not mind to be that channel as long as it is someone who is coming for the Work If this is correct would you please help Vincenzo that this may be possible? "

We gave the letter to Maggie, Mother's secretary, due to its very personal nature. The next day we went to see Maggie for Mother's response. When we asked Maggie Mother's reaction, she gave us a big smile and said "Carry on!" We all smiled, laughed, parted, got married...and carried on. Eight months later we conceived and I notified Mother.

" Thank you Mother, we have conceived and the child is due the third week of August." She replied with blessings, "C'est bien!"

Six months later I went to Madras for the final touches for the baby's room etc. and waited impatiently three days for the Auroville van to come and go back. Rounding a bend in the road after the airport at 80 kilometers an hour there was an unannounced road block with a car and lorry stopped and a full lane to the left. The brakes didn't work.

I was in the front passenger seat. As fate would have it Roger Anger, just arrived from Paris and passing the partially demolished van asked who the Aurovilian, sitting where the motor went into the seat, was. He and Ramanathan sped back to Pondicherry and went straight to Mother, to tell her I needed help. Roger said, "She concentrated within and then looked at him and said 'I will see what I can do. '"

In the meantime my body was panting rapidly in the intensive care unit of the General Hospital of Madras. Vincenzo, Mr. Khaleeli and Azzez Khaleeli and doctors waited by my bed not knowing if I would make it or not - my heart rate was 180 and the blood pressure was 0 since four or five hours. Unbeknownst to them, I suddenly became interiorly conscious of 'glowing' and being infused with a 'glowing and loving warmth' spreading into me. It made me feel so relaxed, warmed and loved - yet it was pouring with firm force into my chest.


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The pressure was so strong I opened with difficulty my heavy eyes to see what was going on. I beheld a beam of intensely pulsating white light approximately 8 inches in diameter, gripping my chest. With my eyes I followed the expanding light beam to the right corner next to the bed. There, standing behind a curtain of this white glowing light, was someone who was condensing all this light into me. It was transparent enough for me to see through with concentration. It was Mother! Vincenzo was standing at the foot of my bed in the middle looking so sad. My alertness caught his eyes and shifting my gaze over to him I smiled and said sighing happily, "It's alright! Mother's here!" and closing my eyes, returned to my bliss filled 'temporary coma'.

After some days I was ambulanced - from the sweltering 110 F. May heat of the 92 bed ward of the General Hospital, with no fan overhead - to a private nursing home with an AC room where I would lay flat on my back in traction for two months. It was heaven. After a couple of days my strength returned. I asked for a clipboard with paper and pen to write Mother. I then related to Her my total experience.

"Dear Mother:

"You know that I am well and happy and very grateful for this experience. There have been so many interior and exterior experiences. I will describe them as best I can. "

"I had gone to Madras to get all the layette for the baby and was impatient to come home since several days but was always told to wait for the van. The day we finally returned we were a group of Aurovilians having lunch at the restaurant before the four of us left. As I rose to go to the Ladies room a friendly voice said "Oh Clare, we can't go back today because we have to fix something on the van... Just kidding" Why I didn't know then, but my eyes welled up with tears and I said "It doesn't matter, it's too late... " As soon as I closed the bathroom door my body pressed against it and went into convulsive weeping. I started to sink towards the floor crying in gasping breaths.


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I had no control over the depth of sadness, anguish and tears that caused this sudden emotional breakdown. "

"While observing interiorly the event I kept hearing a part of me saying, "Don't go back inside! Go to the bus station and take the bus!" It kept saying it over and over and it felt like it was pulling me and I was tempted. But it was the quick speedy voice within that I had been practicing to not respond to. I stood up and bent over the sink still sobbing. When I lifted my head I was shocked by this dramatic change in my behavior and face. I calmed down by pouring cold water into my hands and rubbed my head and neck. Then ...the quite voice within said, "Go back inside. " I knew that was my higher consciousness so I composed myself and returned to the table. Luckily I had sun glasses. Then we all left for Auroville together. "

"Obviously a part of me knew what was coming. In hindsight I realized whoever might have been in my seat, had I listened to that speedy voice, might not have pulled up their legs and put their feet on the glove compartment before impact. That reaction kept them from amputation. "

"Leaving Madras, we rounded the corner after the airport and I heard a tapping noise. Turning to look at Jean Claude, who was driving as to what the problem was, his eyes grew large and he yelled out, "Attention les freins ne marches pas!" (Attention, the brakes don't work!) I turned to look before us and saw what we were heading into; I made a short breathy laugh and thought, "Either this is the 'moment' or you 're protected! ...It's in God's hands!" And after that thought my feet lifted to the glove compartment and my arms went around my knees with my head down on my thighs. Although the movement had to be instantaneous as we were seconds from crashing it felt like I did it so calmly and gently as if in slow motion. I did not hear the crash nor feel it. "

"Immediately after the crash was over I was conscious and could hear everything. I was in a space not in my head but felt situated about six inches behind my heart. I was basking in an


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indescribable ecstasy. I overheard someone say, "We must take her to the hospital in Madras. " When suddenly like an arc of light it was if it was Rob s prediction that he ran to tell me the year before - it continued in a arch of light from right to left: "They are going to take you to the hospital in Madras...!... Everyone will think you are going to die but you won't; it will be wonderful. There was an accident; I saw it!" (At that time he said In 24 hours they would take me to the hospital.)

Even though I was already feeling 'wonderful' this 'clairvoyant reminder' made me think, "Oh, it's just a question of patience. " And I relaxed knowing I was not to be involved in the drama of what was happening. "

"When they withdrew the lorry that pulled off the front of the van now attached to it, they found me in this foetus position against the back seat. The van was full of insulation material so the seat couldn't move. Vincenzo and Stephen were lying down on top of the insulation for the ride back Luckily they could hold onto the bars that ran along the top two sides when Jean Claude yelled out."

"Now the most amazing part began. I heard a discussion outside - 'Should we pull her out or lift her up?' Then, from behind my heart center, a strong, calm and very clear man's voice said, 'Tell them to lift you up. 'To their surprise I spoke for the first time so they knew I was alive, 'Lift me up!' Vincenzo came and took me around the shoulders and under the knees and lifted me up, holding me against him. There was a physical moment of agony as he picked me up but as soon as he held me still I flipped back to the ecstasy place.

Then this man's voice calmly said, 'Tell him to lay you down immediately. 'I said slowly, 'Lay me down immediately' Vincenzo held me in his arms. Then the man's voice again, more authoritatively said, 'Tell him to lay you down immediately.' I looked up at Vincenzo and said breathily, 'Lay me down immediately. 'He held me in his arms.


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Then, like a jolt of energy and intensity his voice demanded, 'Immediately!' It was an order! I started to repeat as the last two times but was gasping for air. I took my left hand and pushed my right hand to quickly guide my elbow with all the force available to me into Vincenzo's chest. With my last breath I choked intently, 'I.. mme.. di.. ate.. ly!' He reacted and laid me flat on the ground.

I nearly passed out from the excruciating pain and agony of being moved but once again as soon as I was flat and still, I flipped back to the wonderful inner space of conscious ecstasy. Agony-ecstasy were my companions for awhile. Once lying down, my body grew with air - like I had been a deflated balloon. I was yet to learn the lung was punctured and my pelvis come apart"

"The couples whose car we knocked to the side before impact into the lorry, insisted they take me to the hospital. On the way to the hospital, although I remained in the ecstasy inner dwelling behind my heart, I felt the need to spit a lot of liquid building in my mouth. I was embarrassed to ask but I said with effort, "I have to spit. " They turned, 'Madame no problem please if you have to spit you must.' So I tipped my head on Jean Claude s shorts and bare knee and blood poured down his leg... When I saw what was flowing I thought, 'This is really dramatic! 'and I felt sorry for Vincenzo watching helplessly from the end of the seat where my feet were on his lap.

Then, after I turned my head back a powerful energy centered on my abdomen and was funneling out of me like a sucking vacuum. It pulled away in a long, intense stream until it was gone like a break-off point. As soon as the energy detached itself I felt a drop of the foetus in my belly. It was the physical collapse within me that made me understand the baby's body was dead and the presence who was coming had left. It was the separation of body and 'spirit or soul'. I had a moment of panic, 'The baby!' but was calmed by the voice 'It's alright there will be another. 'I was comforted and haltingly told Vincenzo at my


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feet, 'I'm sorry about the baby. But there will be another.' (My body released a dead little girl three days later). " When we got to the hospital..."

I won't repeat the hospital story but I did tell Mother about her visit that I certainly appreciated!.. .of course I ended my letter like this. 'Mother, if it is true there will be another, what must I do?' Mother told Maggie to tell me "Ecute les conseils des doctors. " (Listen to the advice of the doctors.) They said I could give birth again but to wait six months. I was so happy.

In July, I could finally leave the wonderful place, Lady Wellington's Nursing Home, where I had rested and healed so well, - and read a lot of Sri Aurobindo. We went to Pondicherry so I could be with Mother. Now I was 'on a mission', no hostile force would interrupt this next pregnancy (Mother had told that to Satprem after the accident.) After returning to Aspiration, I read everything I could find that Mother had written about Conscious Conception. This time I wanted to do it the best I could. Mother wrote that people should be respectful of their energies around pregnant mothers. (In those days when a pregnant mother entered an area where there was loud conversation of people there would be an immediate hush, smile and quiet conversation).

She said that it was ideal if the mother could stay out of the vital vibrations of sexuality during both pregnancy and nursing in order to help the child stabilize harmoniously the layering and settling of all their different 'bodies' into one.

She told how during pregnancy mothers should call into the child the talents and gifts it plight use.

She said one in a hundred thousand conceptions were conscious and how much better if there were more and how at the moment of conception you should open and welcome the spirit/soul coming into your body with love and joy.

She said the soul could enter the body immediately at the beginning of conception or during pregnancy or at the moment of birth; that it was more the decision of the soul and sometime souls will withdraw if the body is not strong enough.


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There are more wonderful insights to be had but these left the greatest impression.

In August I had an intimation that I would conceive in November. I wrote Mother about it and gave Her a date, Nov. 15th that I had too quickly calculated. She wrote back that ' Je croix il faut attendre.' (I think you have to wait.) And She sent me a Blessing Packet. The Blessing Packet was 'special'. I had a leather cover made for it and a strong leather cord and put it around my neck. I told Vincenzo that if he didn't mind I wanted to abstain from all sexuality until the day I conceived but I didn't know if it would be months or a year or more and that would also extend into the pregnancy and nursing duration. He agreed and was so kind to allow me this special experience in Conscious Conception that lasted 21 months. November 30th I awoke and sat up in bed. A swooping pressure and clear thought came down over me, "Tonight you go to Vincenzo." I didn't say anything and wondered during day if it was my vital, but that seemed calm enough so that night a surprised spouse welcomed me and conception was the immediate kind.

"Dear Mother:

"Thank you again for your help. I wore the Blessing Packet you sent me around my neck until conception. Immediately after being with Vincenzo I lay beside him. My consciousness began descending behind my heart again like in the place I found myself after the accident. Getting there was like physically going down an elevator shaft at a 45 degree angle from the head to this heart-place that seemed behind my back.

Once there, this connection to the infinite poured into my body's mid-center, pressing and pulsating so physically like a hole into me that I was conscious of the deep dark vastness of the universe and absolute infinity. As if the roof above my head and room around me had disappeared, I saw only the infinite night, the stars and felt the vastness and stillness of space. In that vast eternal silence the presence poured into me from this infinite place. It was like an old friend I was so happy to meet again!


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Quickly I opened my conscious self to 'Welcoming 'with joy, like you said to do. I stayed still in this 'Welcoming'concentration until the funnelling presence stopped and the feeling of infinity stopped. All was still; I was aware of the room again. I squeezed Vincenzo's hand and said, "She's come. " In the morning Vincenzo didn't remember anything as he had gone into an immediate and deep sleep. So I told him we conceived and would have our child again in the third week of August. Merci Mere. " Mother replied, "C'est bien!"

Nine months later on August 15th, Mother's last Darshan day my first contractions began. After 36 hours of labor our little girl was born. Mother named her Aurotaranti. In Sanskrit this means 'she who is crossing over.'

Conscious conception is something to be truly valued and experienced by any parent. I have even met men who told me they experienced this reality even though their wife did not (although not the same physical experience). One fellow said, I told her every time we conceived. It is not some impossible experience for someone truly and sincerely aspiring to do it. It is a perfect way to master those vital energies though temptation may be great. I can't thank Mother enough for all Her guidance, help and love.

Understandably there are many out there who realize it is something that should be encouraged in the world today. For those who doubt that spirit/soul inhabit the body and that we are only finite manifestation with total endings, I say, "Cheer up, we are all on an incredible adventure and it is throughout the universe". (a talk in 2006)

(Clare Fanning came to Auroville first in 1970. She initiated the creation of "For All/Pour Tous, " Auroville's financial and distribution service and is presently residing in Auroville.)

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Privilege of meeting the Divine in (Francois Gautier)

a human body

- Francois Gautier

A little bit of background on how I came here. I had just turned 19 in Paris when I heard there was a caravan of cars driving to Auroville - Pondicherry in India. In my conscious mind, I was least interested about Auroville and India but I had an urge to go around the world and see the world and 'something' in me compelled me to go. And maybe this caravan was an opportunity to start my journey around the world. It is funny how fate or chance, or whatever you call it picks you up and brings you to your destiny. Actually in Paris I tried to read Sri Aurobindo because I thought maybe I should know something about Auroville but it didn't click that time - it might be two months before I set foot in India. So then I decided to take this caravan and got my parents' permission because in those days - as I was just 19, I was still a minor to leave for a year - upon the pledge that I would come back and finish my studies and settle down as a good Frenchman.

This caravan was a mixture of very-very different personalities. I didn't get along with all of them so well, though there were some great people in that caravan. There was Gerard. You know Gerard Marechal, of course, who has remained a friend till today. There was Krishna, the black Krishna who died a few years ago, who was my protector during that caravan and remained a close friend for many years. It was very adventurous, because the cars were very old and people were so different. Some people knew already about the Mother and Sri Aurobindo and they had the tendency to show off and kind of put us off. They would put the Mother's photo in the van, where we used to eat. I didn't mind but some


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people minded. So there were a lot of tensions in that caravan - it was not a very happy journey actually. It was not like as if I was - you know - coming home to my destiny. It was a difficult journey. There were 5 vehicles - in bad condition. Two of the vans, that were old and both second hand, gave up and we had to pull them with the cars. It was a difficult journey. So lots of adventures, we crossed lots of countries. I'm not going to tell the whole story of that caravan though it is an interesting story too, which I recounted in a French book, the Inner Caravan (La Caravane Interieure, Les Belles Lettres, Paris). Finally, we drove from Lahore and reached Delhi in the morning. It was end of September 1 969 and I didn't feel anything yet. Delhi was then a very beautiful place - it was green, which is not so much anymore. And I remember that Roger Anger and Navajata had flown from Pondicherry to meet us. There was a meeting in the Lodi hotel, I think. I was still not interested. I felt I didn't belong at all to that adventure.

And then we spent the night in the Ashram - what is now Sri Aurobindo Ashram in Aurobindo Marg, Delhi. In those times it was amongst fields - can you imagine that? There was a main building which was a house in the ancient styles with high ceiling and wooden beams which has been broken down since then. I immediately found the place very beautiful. There was huge pictures of the Mother and Sri Aurobindo and it touched something in me. It was evening, sunset time. So I took one of the books of Sri Aurobindo - it was the Life Divine, I think - and I climbed on top of one of the vans. I opened it at random and read a few lines and suddenly something clicked in me deep down. As I said, I didn't know anything about India and about spirituality but somehow in those 4-5 lines I read I understood so many things -like you know in a flash, in an intuitive flash. That this was my home and India was my place. I had come home and I was going to be with the Mother. And I understood concepts about India which today seem very complicated - like reincarnation and karma. So all these things flashed in my mind like a home coming. I felt that I was home and that is I know was very subjective and even now


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it seems like a dream - though a very gifted, very privileged experience.

But we still had to drive of course from Delhi to Pondicherry. It was a long drive and the vans and cars were in a bad condition but my whole life had changed. I decided that my life in France was over and I wrote to my parents that I would not come back. Then we reached Auroville. I think we reached on 2nd of October 1969 - I'm not sure about the date actually. We straightaway went to Promesse - there is a photograph taken of all of us by Barun Tagore in Promesse. We didn't meet the Mother immediately actually. We settled in Aspiration in Auroville. Aspiration even then was a very beautiful place - though it was very bare of course, you could see the sea from everywhere in Auroville, including from the Matrimandir. There were no trees of course, except palm trees. Yet, it was a very beautiful place - there were canyons everywhere sloping towards the road, including this huge Utility one and another in Forecomers... There were fantastic sunsets -I don't know why I don't see those sunsets today that I saw then. And so we went to meet the Mother one by one - it was left to us. I wanted to read a little more. I didn't know anything about Sri Aurobindo and the Mother. So I read for a month and a half, many, many books. And I had a mystical frame of mind already; I was not a very sociable person. So I spent a bit of time alone. I discovered the Samadhi and I spent a lot of time at the Samadhi. I felt closer to the Ashram than to Auroville. As I had cut off with my French past, I felt that in Auroville there was still so many connections with my western atavism and I wanted something very Indian. So my inclination was towards the Ashram and I spent a lot of time there.

So, finally I met the Mother, I think in November and again as you know I was totally unprepared, as my experience in Delhi. I was young, innocent and only knew now that I wanted to stay there all of my life. I was not really ready for what happened to me when I met the Mother. I didn't know what a guru was, what an avatar was. She was the Mother okay but you know... after all


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who is the Mother, I thought? So those of you who met the Mother knew how it happened in those days. One would have an appointment, would climb the steps and then you sit on the terrace where you go for Darshan now, that outer terrace. And already you felt an atmosphere. Of course when you climb it was through the silence of Sri Aurobindo's room. And then it became more compact ... (I feel very emotional .. .I never cried before when I gave a talk. I have given many, many talks.) I was like a child - I was very innocent. And it was such an experience because I didn't expect anything. I mean I expected that She was 'Someone' but that Presence when you are on the Terrace - it was so compact. And when I entered the room, She was ... you know the Mother was always kind of stooped. I don't know, I guess from meeting so many people. So She was looking down, She was alone. There was only Nata, myself and I guess Champaklal and it was an extraordinary atmosphere, so compact and so strong so that my whole being froze. It was like something was happening to me and because I was so young I didn't expect it. It caught my heart, instead of my mind. Usually when I have experiences, the mind starts analyzing, observing. So it was so strong that my mind was frozen too. Then of course I knelt down - I was a bit wobbly, so someone took me and helped me kneel in front of Her. And then She looked at me. I mean, how to . . . how to recount that? When She looked at you it was so deep. They say that you should look in to the eyes to see the soul. "She looked at me and I fe lt She was penetrating me very deep. So again I didn't understand what was happening to me - it was so strong and so beautiful. I was so dazed. I don't know how long it was - maybe 2 minutes, maybe 10 to 20 minutes. She spoke in French a little bit. That time Her voice was already - you know - a little trembling ... But She spoke clearly in French. And then someone helped me get up and somehow I made it out of the room. I sat at the Samadhi for a long time afterwards. This was · an extraordinary experience which changed my life totally. She was already 90 plus - it was 1969.


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So I did meet Her many times. You couldn't meet Her as much as in the 60's. But I did meet Her maybe 5 or 7 times for my birthday and on other occasions. Of course there were Darshans 4 times a year which were powerful experiences because She would appear on the balcony. Not only you could feel Her presence but it was as if She was looking at people one by one. You could feel in those who were below the aspiration going up towards Her. That first meeting was a very powerful experience. My mind was unprepared so I fully opened myself to the Presence and the Power as much as I could within my limitations. I always had a powerful experience with Her but not like the first one when it was so powerful and so overwhelming. I guess when you meet the Divine upon Earth this is how you should meet Him or Her - with an unexpected overflowing and freezing of your entire being under the influence and the power of the Divine.

Of course Auroville was starting - it was a wonderful adventure. I didn't feel connected; I felt very Indian, you know what I mean. Of course I was brought up in France but the moment I had this experience in Delhi I felt very connected to India. My first guru was India. And that experience in the Ashram in Delhi -today if I look at it, it was Mother India It was actually like Mother but in a different form, not as I met Her in a room. I have met again Mother India over the years. Even now I do in some ways, though less, - as one ages you know, less. But I do still, in the Himalayas particularly, or once in Pune. Unfortunately I came in 1969 and the Mother left in 1973 - there were 4 years, a very short time. But they were wonderful, wonderful years. I asked Her if I could move to the Ashram and She agreed in beginning of 1970.

And I moved in a beautiful garden - She put me in the beautiful garden, which is called Mare garden, which is 2 to 3 kilometers outside the city beyond the railway station. There were 600 coconut trees there and we cultivated the flowers that used to go on Sri Aurobindo's Samadhi and I felt extremely happy there. I was alone; I didn't have friends. I used to meet Satprem very often but otherwise I didn't have any friends but I felt extremely


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happy. Everything was possible. It was like a second childhood, a true childhood, like blooming. Everything was blooming, everything was beautiful and I spent a lot of time in the Ashram. I used to sit at the steps that go up to the Mother - I used to sit there for hours and just prayed to Her and wrote to Her. She sent me beautiful things. Once I sent Her a flower and She sent back a plate with different flowers of different meanings put in a certain manner. Once I had a strong experience with a photo of young Sri Aurobindo which is at the entrance. It is the one you see when you enter the Ashram - in the room there is the big photo of Sri Aurobindo in black and white - and I had very strong experience. Again I felt overwhelmed; my mind went blank. Then She wrote to me: 'You had the experience of the silent mind but you were not able to keep it because you started thinking '. So, wonderful years, - say from 1969 till 1 972 - they were the best years of. my life. We all thought that the Mother would never go, of course. Those of us who were young or innocent or who had faith, thought that She would never go. And some of us even thought that we too would never go. (That is another matter.) After 1 972 - of course you know that She was not well so we were worried - some of us a little bit. For a long period She would not see anybody. Then She would come out again looking more frail. When She left in 1973 . .. I don't want to sound negative. Recently I was interviewed for the Auroville Radio and I didn't feel I spoke negatively but then I was told afterwards that it was very pessimistic and very negative. When the Mother left something left from our life. I mean I saw myself, and this was what I believed - it might sound pessimistic. Something went out of our life, of everywhere, of the Ashram, of Auroville and even of our personal life. Ok, the presence of the Mother is still there, Her Grace is still there, but what we lived . . . Those of us who knew Her.. . I can speak for myself: the extraordinary Grace of the Divine upon the Earth, that went away. I never thought about this with emotion like that because it happened. But yeah, for me it was a dramatic event. And I feel that we all suffered from it, whether it is Ashram or Auroville. It is


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true that Auroville today is not what it should be. The Mother told us it would be .... We know that when She was there sometime She would despair and said: "Oh, it will take 300 years, you know. These people, they..." But then everything was possible when She was there. Everything was fast, everything was immediate. Everything was possible. When She left, I don't know whether it was a defeat because at that time it sounded like a defeat for all of us. And we felt responsible in some ways that She left but immediately, practically in life one could see around us and in us the effect of Her withdrawal. How things started going haywire and people started fighting whether it is in the Ashram departments or the trustees or in Auroville. And the dream looked like it was receding away.

You know there were such wonderful people in the beginning of Auroville. They were great souls. It was clear that She had called whether directly or indirectly people who were instruments, were connected. I mean I was connected, recalling now how I came here without knowing why I have come here. These great souls either left Auroville or died. And that happened very quickly after She left, I think. Every time the Divine incarnates upon Earth the same thing happens. There is blooming, there are instruments who come, wonderful dreams that seem to be getting materialized. Then slowly the disciples are not up to the mark or the avatar dies because He or She takes the human body and plays by the human rules. But in our case - of course because the Supramental of which nobody can doubt the inevitability, but one could doubt the timing now - we thought that She would stay.

Of course when She left, I think for those of us who were either young or had faith, it was a. terrible trauma that I never understood till today. Actually those who don't know the Mother maybe are more fortunate because they can find the Presence without having known Her. They have to find the Presence and they do find the Presence. And She is there in many ways. Directly as a Mother who manifested Herself as a Divine Mother - many of Her aspects whether they are personal or impersonal. So She is


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there for everybody to reach. But for us, for me it was very traumatic, Her going away. She said that She would ren1ain with us and why did She go? And also what happened after She left? So one ages and in one's life one does things. I did things in my life. Now I'm married to a wonderful person here- Namrita - she brought so much in my life. India has brought so much in my life also. After that I started doing some journalism and writing. I traveled all over India and met so many wonderful people. And I am still in some comer or the other of India. I feel that She is present, it is happening. I hope this is not a talk that is going to make you sad and I hope I was able to convey the extraordinary Grace of meeting the Divine. Very few of us had the privilege of actually meeting the Divine in the human body and feel that Divinity. That is something extremely unique and I feel very privileged for that and I'm happy that today we had the occasion to talk about it. Thank you very much. (04-11-2007)

(Francois Gautier is a noted columnist in prominent national newspapers in India and France and has authored several books. He is living in Auroville.)

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Presence of a Warrior

  Richard Pearson

- Richard Pearson

I hadn't intended to say anything, but when Francois was talking about the Mother's departure I had a feeling that I'd like to share with you my experience of the moment. For that I'll have to take you back to 1950 when Sri Aurobindo passed away. It so happened that I was not in Pondicherry on that day. Somehow for some reason - I do not know - my father had arranged to see professor S. at Annamalai University who did experiments with the effect of music on plants. This had been approved by the Mother and we were to leave on 5th December. At four o'clock the photographer friend of ours, Venkatesh, knocked on the window and said, "I don't feel we should go today" . But my father said, "Well, Mother had given the blessings. I will go but do what you feel". And when we came to Chidambram near Annamalai University we had something to eat. There was someone in the restaurant who asked: "Is there something new? Anything happened in Pondicherry?" We said, "No, everything is normal. Sri Aurobindo is not well, but ... " So we went on and when we reached Annamalai University we were received by Dr. Singh. There was a student who was working with a radio - and he had made his own radio - who said, "I hear that Sri Aurobindo has passed away." So this was a big shock. As Francois said, we believed that Mother and SriAurobindo would continue their work, that they would be able to finish everything that they wanted to do. Shall we go back? What shall we do? Doctor Singh said, "Well, you have come this far, you might as well spend a few more hours with me and then go back in the evening." And that is what we did.


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When we got back, I just took the kuja (an earthen water pot) as usual. I go to the Ashram to take water - that was my part of the housekeeping with my father. When I went to the Ashram I couldn't recognize the place. It looked as though there was a stampede. The newly planted trees outside the Ashram - they were quite big, they were planted in 1 94 7 - were all as though bent over and the Ashram rockery looked like a mess. When somebody passes away, in India, everybody is welcome to pay their respects and since it was Sri Aurobindo who appeared so rarely in public there was a kind of a stampede. I am not going to go into details because many of you have read and many of you knew a little about the 4-5 days that passed when SriAurobindo lay in state in the room. I just want to tell you how surprised I was that I wasn't even in Pondicherry. Somewhere in me I knew that something perhaps could not bear that. And my friends told me, "Oh, you missed! What you have missed!" A whole town came crowding into the Ashram. I am rather by nature a sensitive person. I cannot bear mistreating or cruelty or harm, particularly with regards to plants and animals. But inside me I had this question: Why was I outside Pondicherry? And we didn't know. This was answered when the Mother passed away (on 1 7th November, 1 973).

We knew that Mother was very weak. We had heard painful cries in Her room and we knew that She was undergoing a lot of suffering, physical suffering. As with Sri Aurobindo, we didn't expect Her to leave. At 4 o'clock in the morning somebody comes to the window and knocks on the window and says, "Come quickly to the Ashram! The Mother has left Her body." In a flash the thought that came to me was: "The Mother remembered my wish, that I should be informed. Probably Mother is so gracious She even sent somebody to tell me." I went to the Ashram. I also called out at Kailas' place. She was living near the French institute. So I just passed on the message as soon as I had little time in the duty of controlling people who were coming. There was hardly anybody at that time - just a few boys at different points. And it was an extremely peaceful arrangement and well organized. But this


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thought was constantly in me: "But why did She leave?" You have all seen the Mother's couch in the Meditation Hall where Her body was laid to rest. Mother never lay completely flat. She believed that to lie flat was going to Inconscience. So she preferred to sleep or rather rest or whatever you call it in an inclined position - just resting back like that. In fact, She often said: "You see my posture? It is like that because I never lie down, so I got a hunchback. But I want to be straight!" Well, She was in the Meditation Hall and after our duty was over and things were more smooth I took my chance in waiting to go before Her, - too difficult to describe the emotion - before a Person with whom one has interacted, with whom one has been quite close. And to see just... as one would say, just a body .... Everything in the Mother is unexpected. Absolutely unexpected. When we went before the Mother what I saw was a living Presence of a Warrior, of a Fighter, a grim determined person whose work was not finished, who was constantly battling, physically battling with a grim determination to bring the final Victory! It was so powerful! So intent! We often say here: "A peaceful death, he looks so peaceful...." I was so surprised it was just the contrary. Something strong, something powerful, something that would never give up, which was that.... Each time I went back to witness this, it was always the same impression.

As Francois said we would sit in the Ashram and look into ourselves, trying to understand. But what I am trying to say is something I cannot even explain to myself. This question "Why did She leave?" went on sort of nagging me - prodding me - but insistently I wanted to know the answer. I started to become clear with the answer the more I began to realize that She was there, She was present. And the feeling when sitting in the Ashram was simply that She has now entered into everyone, everywhere. There is no corner, no place that could be hidden from Her, from Her Presence.... It was an inaccuracy to say that She has left, and yet She is there, you know? The more I was assured of the answer, the more I knew that She was, She is and She will be always present.


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It was also a very moving experience on the 20th of November when Her casket was taken - what we call in English the coffin although it is a terrible word, but here in French there is no better, - it was really Her Grace that I was called to be one of the bearers at that time. A notice had come out in the Ashram announcing who would be carrying the casket. I read it and just thought, "Well it will be nice to be there, but it doesn't really matter. "And I was busy with hundred and one things to be done. Go to Harpagon to see if everything is ready. Is the box going to come? Because it was done in those 4 days. And then little errands around that had to be done. Suddenly somebody came up to me and said: Go and get ready. You are also going to carry the Mother's casket. So I went home and fortunately I had a white short already ironed. I put it on and came back. I just like to share with you a rather amusing incident at this bearing of the casket. There was another boy also who was called Sumantra, another friend of mine, whose name was added. And we were outside when the Mother's body was placed in the coffin. We could only smell the perfume. And I have a feeling that when some great soul, the Avatar decides to leave the Earth it is as though the heavens opened up. You know that at the very last Darshan of the Mother - the August Darshan, I believe, - it poured Light. Heavens really opened up. There was such a torrential rain in which everybody was just spellbound as the Mother came to the Balcony. But this small incident or reflection went on in my head as we were taking the casket into the Samadhi: the coffin was not light at all. Yes Mother is completely unexpected. And everything happens in a way where we don't even know why it happened or how it happened but of course the result is that we become a different person. I may go on and on but I just thought it would be nice to talk of these things.

Thank you.

Before I read this I would just like to mention. Yesterday I was reading what Mother said to Mona about "Savitri" - the value of "Savitri", the importance of "Savitri". The part that struck me was when She said: No one in the world has ever suffered like


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Sri Aurobindo. He has borne sufferings that mankind cannot even imagine. And then of course She describes the future that He reveals in "Savitri" and that we are perhaps not yet even ready to understand all that he has put. She said that of course for those who do not know. It is His and Mother's full yoga.

To Thee

who hast been the material envelope of our Master,

To Thee our infinite gratitude.

Before Thee who has done so much for us,

Who has worked, struggled, suffered, hoped, endured so

much,

before Thee who hast willed all, attempted all, prepared, achieved all for us, before Thee we bow down and implore that we may never forget, even for a moment, all we owe to Thee.

(Mother had Her above words engraved on Sri Aurobindo's Samadhi - Ed) (04-11-2007)

(Richard Pearson joined the Ashram in 1946 where he is now working as teacher, in physical education. He brought out the book 'Flowers and Their Messages'- a compilation of all the significances given by the Mother to flowers. Auroville has published a book of his interviews with Mother on selecting on the 'Central flowers' of Matrimandir gardens: 'Matrimandir Gardens and flowers')

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She was looking at everyone one by one (Buvanasundari Sudharsan)

- Buvanasundari Sudharsan

Just two days before, on Thursday, we were reading - every Thursday we are reading "Savitri" during Shraddhavan's classes-and this Thursday we were reading a line from "Savitri": All these inventions of the mind is just pebbles collected by a child on the sea shore. In the same way I feel that before this strong gathering I am a very small person. But even then I am Her child and I am proud that She had poured Her Grace on me when I was a teenager. Though my family was in Madurai, we were forced to move here by the higher Grace which made my father to move to Pondicherry for construction of JIPMER. He was the manager of a construction company and we came here. I was studying my high school here at Immaculate Convent. And although Ashram was very much close, coming from a very orthodox Brahmin family we children were prohibited to go beyond the canal. We were made fearful. "Don't go there, Ashram is there." And because something made them to say like that, my parents were telling that. Though my father was busy here in building, my mother used to say, "You go to school, come back and be here." And something in the teenager mind creates the question: "Why shouldn't I go?" In those days the school was from 8 to 11 and again it started at 2 o'clock in the afternoon. During the break, myself, my brother - everybody go home, take lunch and come back to school. I decided to take my lunch with me for a few days. I told my mother that I wanted to be in the school to study with bright students - I told some lies like that. And one of my friends was also interested to go and see the Ashram and Samadhi. Our only attraction there was the beautiful flowers. Beautiful! We've never have seen such roses and other


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flowers, and very good variety is there. So the Samadhi was decorated with nice flowers. And fragrance! Before even entering the gate, what a nice smell! So we would finish our lunch quickly. Just take only curd rice, eat it quickly and keeping everything in the class room we ran but slowly because we were afraid also. We slowly stepped into the Ashram and just saw how nicely decorated flowers were there. One evening both of us went after 4' o clock. People were going very fast and we thought, "Oh, why don't we also go?" And then, the people were telling: "Mother is appearing in the Balcony. She is giving Darshan." I was not even knowing what Darshan was. She was giving Darshan - that was it. So everybody went. And we also - both of us - went and stood opposite the platform. Very few people were there - maybe 100 or 150, not more than that in the evening time. She came and just put Her hands on the balcony railing and She was looking at one by one slowly from that end to this end. And the atmosphere was so dense - I can feel that even now. And She was very slow. I was not knowing what was happening there, what was the significance of that Darshan - nothing. I knew that the great person in the Ashram was coming up and giving Her Darshan. (Buvanasundari is living in Auroville since 2005. She teaches basic English to village youngsters at Savitri Bhavan and also music to differently-abled children at Deepam School, Auroville.)

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"From Divine Mother to Richard"

- Narad

I would like to begin with a few lines from Savitri.

Always we bear in us a magic key

Concealed in life's hermetic envelope.

A burning Witness in the sanctuary

Regards through Time and the blind walls of Form;

A timeless Light is in his hidden eyes;

He sees the secret things no words can speak

And knows the goal of the unconscious world

And the heart of the mystery of the journeying years.

(Savitri, Pg.49)


Alive in a dead rotating universe

We whirl not here upon a casual globe

Abandoned to a task beyond our force;

Even through the tangled anarchy called Fate

And through the bitterness of death and fall

An outstretched Hand is felt upon our lives.

It is near us in unnumbered bodies and births;

In its unslackening grasp it keeps for us safe

The one inevitable supreme result

No will can take away and no doom change,

The crown of conscious Immortality,...

(... Pg. 59)

I have so many things to tell you that I had to write them out, so that I wouldn't forget some of these very special moments with Mother. This is a talk similar to the one I gave on Feb. 14th last year in the Hall of Harmony. Mother had written to me, through


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Pavitra, not to try to reconstruct my inner experiences as it would bring about a deformation that would render them quite useless. So I can only say that 12 years after Sri Aurobindo left His body, in a very short period of time I had His Darshan twice - Mother confirmed it - and again on 9.9.99. I had my first experience of the mystical at a very young age - perhaps when I was five or six years old. My mother was dying and the doctors were unable to cure her of an extremely high fever. As there was nothing more they could do, and they had given up on her, her brothers decided to bring a monk who had lived on Mount Athos in Greece to our home in a small town in New Jersey in the U.S. His name was Father Afanasi. He was a healer. I remember bis black robes, none too clean, and his tall yet humble presence. He entered the room where all of us were standing around my mother's bed. He said nothing, but held a dish of holy water in his left hand. With his right hand, he threw the water three times on my mother's face. Almost instantly she got out of bed, said she was fine, and went to the kitchen to prepare food for the family.

My father was a Roman Catholic, who converted to my mother's religion, the Russian Orthodox faith, when my little brother was dying and the local priest demanded money to pray for him. Although the music of the Russian church was to me more beautiful than any other choral music I had ever heard, I revolted against religion at an early age, feeling there must be something more. So I studied the philosophy of Rudolf Steiner, including his bio-dynamic practices, and shortly thereafter met a Pandit and began the study of Raja Yoga. At the same time I was preparing for an operatic career for the Metropolitan Opera, on a scholarship from one of the leading mezzo-sopranos of the day, Regina Resznick, and I began taking voice lessons from her teacher, Rosalie Miller. At Hunter College I met the writer and philosopher Rene Fulop - Miller, who befriended me and through him, I met Dmitri van Mohrenschildt who was to become a lifelong friend. To quickly conclude this introduction: I was offered a scholarship to Shantiniketan by the Pandit I had been studying with since my


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late teens. I worked two jobs at the same time to earn enough to come to India, and I followed him to California. I waited week after week and he kept delaying, and finally, as my funds were dwindling - after working 16 and 18 hours a day! - he said, "Everything has fallen through. If you truly want to do yoga, go home to your family and practice samata - equality." I looked him in the eye and said, 'No! I am going to India.' And almost as if by miracle, within a day or two I met Jyotipriya, whose name was given to her by Sri Aurobindo, when at a very young age she travelled alone to India to find the secret of the Veda. She told me of this extraordinary journey. She had been a theosophist - her whole family was in the Theosophical Society in California - and she went to Benares to find the secret of the Veda. But the pandits said there was no secret. Then, in a few days a man came to her and gave her a typewritten manuscript - it was a copy of Sri Aurobindo's Secret of the Veda long before it was printed. The man was Arabinda Basu. And she said, "I have nowhere else to go, I need not seek anything else." She came immediately to the Ashram, and Sri Aurobindo gave her her name Jyotipriya. Her name was Dr. Judith Tyberg. She was a professor of Sanskrit. When I met her, at the East-West Cultural Center - one of the focal points of the Mother and Sri Aurobindo 's work in America - I saw the photos of Mother and Sri Aurobindo for the first time. When I was nineteen perhaps, I heard in that Pandit's group, a man who said, "Oh yes, I know Aurobindo -_he's that man who can say things in 20 words when he could have used one." I was twenty-two years old, and Jyotipriya said, " you must contact Mother." In those days one had to send a photograph and a sample of one's handwriting - not just a photo. Mother's reply came back very quickly by telegram: "Tell him he may come and stay as long as he likes." Oh, can you imagine that for a young man?! So I boarded a Japanese freighter bound for Japan, with a Blessing Packet from the Mother and we ran into a typhoon. The deck was loaded with redwood logs, 200-300 feet long, and I watched them break off like toothpicks in the sea. Nothing was left on the deck. The captain


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said, "If we go one more degree we will capsize." Knowing nothing, I still knew that Mother would not allow this ship to go down. And I said, "We won't capsize, I have to go and see Mother." Then the seas calmed, they all prayed on their knees, and we made h through to Japan. Then, because it is not easy to get to Mother, we had two weeks in Tokyo and then Kyoto, where while waiting for another ship to come, I visited the gardens that Mother had seen. I went to one garden that was so magnificent, and there I met a monk who took us around to each building, and speaking in the most perfect English I have ever heard he told us the entire story of how each building had been prepared. So I asked him if I could come back the next morning, and just ask him a couple of questions. I had seen a tree, just outside, a huge pine tree, maybe 90 feet tall, and it was wrapped in straw to about half of its height, and I wanted to know about this. He said, "Yes, come." So I returned at 8 o'clock sharp, I knocked on the door and as I knocked it opened, and he was there. "Come in, come in." I said "Sir, I'm so very happy to ..." "Slow, ...no English." No English? He had memorized, from an Englishman, each plaque that was on each building, and since that fellow had perfect diction, he also had perfect diction. So I had to go very slowly. I said, "Tell, me about that tree." He said, "Tree sick - give medicine. Two hundred years more, OK."

So I got on the ship. It was delayed one hour, then another hour.... I was wondering, "When am I going to get to Mother?" Suddenly my name was called. I was down in the hold, hot and smelly. I had not filled out the proper exit permit and they were going to put me off the ship. There were some French sailors who said, "We can stow you away." They got ready to stow me away, and then I had this feeling from Mother, "No, you must stay in Japan." And I stayed for another few weeks, and I had an experience that was so beautiful. As I was singing for people, they asked me to come to a Children's Orchestra and to sing for them. You see, this was all the Grace, all the Divine Grace. I went there: every child was blind. They had formed an orchestra of blind children. They played for me, and I sang for them. Then I got a flight, I was


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helped, and I made my way from Madras to Pondicherry - after many, many adventures in the South China sea - and the bus from Madras to Pondicherry cost me three rupees, and I had about ten rupees left. Dayabhai took me in at Park Guest House. I arrived on November 23rd 1961, I had turned 23. On the morning of November 24th I had my first Darshan of Mother. The old balcony or what we now call Balcony road - was so close, and I have seen in the exhibition where people felt that Mother looked at each one individually... there is no question about it. Each of us knew the moment She looked on us. In fact, one time, She looked at me and Her eyes turned into diamonds and the diamonds hit me right here in the heart and I fell back, three feet. I told my friend Marilyn about these spinning diamonds that bored through my heart and she said, "Oh, that's not such an interesting experience - Janina has made a painting of it, it's in the Ashram Library, go and have a look at it." So I went to the Library and had the experience again, because there it was, in the painting. Mother's eyes were absolutely spinning in that painting. So I guess many people had that experience, but for me it was very special. When Mother saw that I was having difficult time with the food She sent me a large brick of Cheddar cheese. The cheese was wonderful, but what She put into it, and the fact that She thought of me,....

Each time I went to see Mother I had the same experience, of entering a room without walls. Another friend of mine, Bob Zwicker in the Archives, also has had this experience. I recall that it was a very large room, and one had to walk some distance to reach Mother's feet. But now I see that it's a tiny little room, and not even a step and a half, you could be there. My first meeting with the Mother lasted about an hour. When you go to Sri Aurobindo's room, and you are coming out and you see where They sat together to give Darshan, and when you turn to go out, there is a chair there and that is where we had our interviews with Mother. Today no one stops me when I put my head on Her footstool. Mother, spoke to me for some time about music, and She asked me, "Is the music with you now? " I said, "Yes Mother,


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it is always with me." It was recurring music that came all the time. Mother looked at me and smiled and said, "Not always. " And then She took it away, for many years, to work on other aspects. And so for a long time, the music went into the background, although I kept listening. Mother spoke to me further about Chopin, which-was very interesting. She said that Chopin's music is that most often heard on the subtle planes, but, She said, "I don't know why. " Then She said, "You must bring down a new music!" At the time, I was studying opera and more than opera, concert lieder and art song. So poetry and music were very much intertwined. I said, "Mother, I don't know anything about combining words and music." Mother said, "No, no, you must go far above words and bring down the pure music. " After more than 40 years of listening to thousands and thousands of works of music, seeking the new music, singing - not often, having given up all thought of a concert career, some years ago I had an experience that the New Music was to descend in a collective body - one body, in aspiration. So I began, by Her Grace, the OM Choirs in the Ashram and Auroville. There is so much I could say about the OM Choirs, but Sergey and Fabrice have recorded me last week, so eventually you will hear about that, because I have much more to tell you about experiences with Mother.

I go back to the Ashram, my first days. I became an Ashramite-Mother put me on Prosperity. I was a pretty wild fellow. Mother knew this of course. So one day, at 6 in the morning, a young man comes to me and says, "Nolini would like to see you." I went to Nolini, and he said the most extraordinary thing to me. He said, "Mother wants you to know that She gives you complete freedom in the Ashram... but with that comes total responsibility." At the time, because my vital was little too active, I went back to the U.S. in 1962. From there I wrote some notes and questions to Mother, and She wrote underneath Her answers. So I would write, "To Divine Mother from Richard" and She would cross out 'To' and 'From' and write "From Divine Mother to Richard." My parents were devastated. I was virtually disowned, because leaving


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the Church was a terrible thing to do. Mother wrote, "Will they not understand if you tell them simply that you have a way of your own?" The next question was about my future work - because Mother had totally up ended me. I didn't know where to go, what to do: this force that She had put in me... I couldn't go back to... I don't know, that world. So I asked her, "What should I do?" Should I carry on with training my voice, or should I form a Choir ...?" Mother wrote, "One or the other, because the most important thing is not so much what you choose, but the spirit in which you will do it. Keep living in you the spirit of consecration, and all will be all right."

Mother told me to marry: "You must marry. No doubts and no hesitation. " Then there was this wonderful young man, an extremely handsome young man, who invited me to go all through Europe with him, and of course, to meet many beautiful young ladies. His name was Ivan. Mother wrote simply, "Better not. " And you know, when I next met Her again She went through each question again in detail, without referring to anything - and She had seen thousands and thousands of people prior to that time, - in just the order I had written in my letters. The interesting thing was, at the end. She told me about this man, this wonderful fellow. She said, "It is better not to be with people who live outside of themselves, as it were. " And before I returned to the United States Mother wrote me this beautiful letter: "Go on boldly, following your way with joy and confidence, taking great care of one thing only - never to forget the Divine. "

When I returned to the U.S. I worked at various jobs to put food on the table. I married Anie, and did whatever I could for Mother's work. I took up the work of the handmade water-colour paper, which I asked Mother to name, and She gave it the name, Arvind. I made contact with the most well-known water-colour artists in the U.S, and sent them samples of the paper, and they were all ecstatic about it and wrote glowing endorsements. But although the samples were fine, the quality-control was lacking. The first ream of paper that arrived was ruined by sea-water


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because it wasn't properly packed. And the interesting thing at this point was that the handmade papers from England, the Watman Papers, had just gone out of business because of labour costs, and there was only one Italian paper, and the Ashram had a chance to make millions of dollars, so I apologized profusely to this company and said, "We'll send another ream and it will be fine." But the second ream arrived full of black spots in the paper. The rag hadn't been properly cleaned. This was 100% rag, handmade water-colour paper. So I met a man from Long Island who was an expert in making handmade rag paper. He told me that if I would get a ticket for him to go to the Ashram he would go to share his expertise and teach the people how to make handmade paper properly. I wrote to Mother and then on this beautiful card She sent me, She wrote, "This is all a dream in the air and cannot be realised. " So I had to leave it. And then She said, "If they cannot do it properly, then it has to be left. " And so it was left.

She would send me birthday cards every year, write on them with Her love and blessings, but one year She wrote - She put Sri Aurobindo's quote on there and She wrote, and it has been the source of so much of my aspiration: "It is by a constant inner growth that one can find a constant newness and unfailing interest in life. " In the mid -1960's I was working at various jobs and at one point I got a position in a record store. In those days it was long-playing vinyl records. So I thought I would write Mother, and I wrote Her a two page letter to ask Her what composers She had heard, and I put together a chronological list of composers since the time of Debussy and Ravel. Mother wrote me a beautiful letter, which has unfortunately been lost, possibly destroyed at my parent's home, in which She said She would be very happy to listen to all of the records I would send Her. She underlined the last composers She had heard, Debussy and Ravel, and wrote, "I probably have heard almost everything they have written. " But from that time onward She had not heard any of the composers I had listed. So with the help of a musicologist, who was the manager of the record store, I put together a box of fifty


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long-playing records with all the great composers from that point on. I included electronic music, and even the Doors, the rock and roll group, and Mother listened every afternoon for 1 hour until She had heard everything.

In the mid -1960's I had an accident, in a blizzard, on an icy hill. Two elderly ladies had stalled their car, perpendicular to traffic, and there was no way to stop the car, I crashed into them. Anie went into the windshield and had to have numerous stitches, but Mother said there would be no scars, and there were no scars. Finally - you know in those days one recovered very little; today it's millions and millions of dollars if you burn your tongue on a cup of coffee at MacDonald's - but we recovered 3000 dollars for medical expenses. I immediately wrote to Mother and offered to send Her the money, and She wrote back, " Why don't you use the money to come for the inauguration of Auroville? " It was 1500 dollars a ticket exactly, so there was the 3000 dollars. And Mother gave me permission to photograph the entire ceremony of the inauguration, of all the young people putting the soil in the Urn, and these have become part of Auroville's Archives.

I went to Mother many times during that period. The first meeting with a man from Los Angeles, Anie, and myself. This gentleman, Isidore, was not for this life, and Mother looked at him and smiled, then turned to Anie, and She said, "This is not the first time we have met. You have been with me many times before, many, many times. " Imagine that! Then She turned to me and said, "You don't want to come to Auroville in a few years? I feel you can do something there. " I said, "Yes, Mother - whatever is your will." We returned to America in March 1968, when I began a period of - I was in fact already working as a manager of a restaurant, and I became a partner in another restaurant, very successful, making a lot of money and then a day came when I began to hear this voice. The voice was saying constantly, "Go to California and help Jyotipriya." So I wrote to Mother. No answer. One month goes by and no answer. I said, "Surely Mother, there has to be something ..." - because the voice wasn't stopping.


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So I wrote to Mother and again, and Mother sends me a telegram: "My answer to you was so positive that I thought I had written it!" So I left immediately for California, to work with Jyotipriya. But it was not to be a few years, because Udar wrote just after that, saying, "Mother has asked me to write and tell you that She wants you to prepare to come and build the gardens of the Matrimandir." I wrote back asking Mother whether She wanted me to pursue formal studies, or practical work in the field. And Mother said, "A combination of both would be best. " So I worked during the day and went to college at night. I studied plant combination theory and other aspects of horticulture, while working with Jyotipriya as well. Now I should tell you that almost all of my life has been working with plants and flowers - since the age of eleven I was cutting grass, at a Fire House, or at a petrol station; and not knowing much about plants, my father, who was in electronics, decided that he would become a landscaper and work with another person, and so, you see I can now look back some 50 years later, and see that this was all worked out by the Divine Grace. So I began to collect seeds, and with all the young people in the East-West Cultural Center, we would go out and on weekends to all to parks and public gardens and collect seeds to plant at the Matrimandir. Now my experience with plants had been with temperate-climate plants. But the move to California to work with Jyotipriya gave me the opportunity to know sub-tropical species, preparing me for the tropical species. So again Mother had worked everything out. I thought I had three years to prepare. And in 9 months Mother writes me, "A Bientot" - See you soon. So then I had to go right away, and came in December, 1969.

We went up to Mother, on Anie's birthday, December 18th. And it was at this time that Mother spoke to me of the Gardens -and Her voice was so strong and so clear! She said, "It must be a thing of great beauty - of such a beauty that when men enter they will say, "Ah, this is it!" and they will experience physically and concretely the significance of each garden. In the Garden


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of Youth they will know Youth. In the Garden of Bliss they will know Bliss. " Then She raised Her hand, and she said, "One must know how to move from Consciousness to Consciousness. "And then She said, "It must manifest something of that which we are trying to bring down. " Mother said, "You will make some sketches and show them to me, and we will see together. " And then She said, "I would like you to begin with the Garden of Unity. "Now when it comes to Art, I have two left thumbs. I have absolutely no capacity as an artist or an architect - I'm virtually hopeless. I worked with Pierre LeGrand on certain sketches, but nothing came, and for years nothing came.

I was 31 years old, and one night I had a dream. This was in 1970. I saw "our house", and Mother said it was to be the first house built in Auroville at the place called Peace at the Centre. Of course, it was never done, as so many things were never done, but that's all right. I dreamt of this house - a beautiful house, it was round and people were sitting all around on a beautiful white carpet and there was one light coming from the centre into the middle of the house. Of course Matrimandir hadn't been started then, but I know that the Matrimandir is our house, and yours, and She gave me the blessings to see it.

Anie had a dream shortly after that, and she wrote to Mother: "I was going up into the sky because I saw a golden tree and I said I must bring a branch down to earth and plant it for Mother." So Anie wrote the whole dream out, and Mother wrote on the letter: "It's not quite a dream, and it is a very good indication of the work you are doing. "

Then Mother gave me the work of reading Savitri every week under the Banyan, and then at the Centre, where we all stayed, in the area called Peace, where I read Savitri for 10 years. When the excavation for the Matrimandir was to begin, I wrote to Mother asking if it would not be better if Aurovilians did the work of building the Matrimandir, and She replied that it would be better if Aurovilians did all the work.


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I found a good location for the Matrimandir Gardens Nursery, with a large canyon at the back, and a lower road on the south side, and the possibility of some protection from the herds of goat that would wipe out months of work in a few hours. Mother gave Her Blessings for the site.

The early 70s through the mid-seventies were a time of difficulty in Auroville. Very little food some times, almost no amenities, and there was an aspect of superiority I guess you would say, from some of the workers on the construction, looking down on the people who were doing 'flowers'. So Mary Helen wrote to Mother, and Mother replied that the Gardens were as important as the Matrimandir itself.

Now just briefly, I'll tell you what has come to me about the Gardens. I spoke to 50 people this morning. You see the Golden Chain people come out, they have been every Sunday for the few months that I have been here, and they come out every other Sunday normally, and we have worked so harmoniously together, and the moment we're together there is a joy that fills everyone with the beauty of the work, and the devotion that they bring to it. And now Aurovilians are beginning to join the work. So this is what I have experienced about the Gardens. You see, they begin in a counter-clockwise direction, with Existence - Existence is first, Consciousness following Existence, and Bliss - Sachidananda. Sachidananda, manifested on the earth. Now as a result of Sachidananda, there is Light. With Light, comes Life. So, Existence, Consciousness, Bliss, Light, Life. From Life naturally evolves Power. So Existence, Consciousness, Bliss, Light, Life, Power. Power brings Wealth. Wealth utilised properly, Usefulness, brings Progress - that is the ninth garden. Progress leads to the last three gardens: Youth - an eternal Youth, Harmony - an indivisible Harmony, and the last Garden, Perfection - perfect Perfection... which leads to Sachidananda.

More than 60 flower significances were named by the Mother from Matrimandir Gardens Nursery. All the hibiscus with Auroville names, with the exception of one, were grown here, and Mother


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would express great delight when they were brought to Her. From downstairs I could hear Her, saying thing like, "Magnifique ,.." These hibiscus were of course the Hawaiian hibiscus, huge flowers, which She has named interestingly at first "Charm of Auroville", "Sweetness of Auroville" and then later She said, "We have to give them a wider significance for the rest of the world. So we will call them "Charm of the New Creation". Auroville is the New Creation, so they bear a dual name: "Beauty of the New Creation", "Blossoming of the New Creation", "Concentration of the New Creation", "Firmness of the New Creation", "Ideal of the New Creation", "Manifold Power of the New Creation", "Progress of the New Creation", "Usefulness of the New Creation" etc. Among the wonderful names that the Mother gave that reverberate in my consciousness and will reverberate for ever, named from Auroville, and grown in the Matrimandir Gardens Nursery - just to name a few: "Remembrance of Sri Aurobindo", "Opening to Sri Aurobindo's Force", "To live only for the Divine", "Joy of Union with the Divine" etc.

I worked with Richard Pearson to update the botanical information for the first revision of The Flower Book. And then with Mary Helen, who did many of the line drawings; and Mary Aldridge on the plant descriptions, grammar etc. During this time we had the great blessing of asking Mother numerous questions on flowers and plants, and Her answers forms the basis of the current and previous books. For example I wrote to Mother, asking what effect the Supramental would have on flowers, and Mother replied that flowers would be among the first to respond the Supramental, as their entire life is an aspiration for Light. I also wrote and asked Her, "If our flower offering depends on our state of consciousness, does it help to learn the significance of flowers, even if it is purely mental to begin with?" Mother wrote back, "Yes, surely."

Then we had this cyclone in 1972. A huge branch of the Service Tree was broken off, and you must have read what Mother has said about our consciousness being responsible for that. I saw the


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young men beginning to cut the branch, and the way they were doing it, it would have torn the bark down the entire tree. Since I had worked so many years with my father pruning trees, I asked if I could help. I knew Parichand very well. He was my elder brother, in the yoga - and he said, "Yes, go up." And so I showed them how to cut it and we worked the whole day, and at the end that huge stub came off perfectly, and you can see today that it has healed completely. When I completed that, Parichand came to me and he said, "Mother has sent you this Blessings Packet to care for the Service Tree for the rest of your life."

All through the 70's I had bouts of amoebic dysentery, and I was in the Nursing Home so many times and Dilip Datta would look after me. And at one point, I was so ill that I felt I should leave the body. So I wrote to Mother, saying, "What should I do? Should I take this medicine (which was a horrible medicine called Flagyl) or should I just put myself in your hands and let happen what happens, and just pray to you?" Mother wrote back, "Take the medicine and pray to me. " I recovered!

On my birthday in 1972 I went up to Her room and She greeted me with a vast smile, and a powerful and joyous "Bonne Fete" ! After She handed me my card, I placed my head on Her feet, and knowing only a little because of the "Notes on the Way", I didn't want to take too much of Her time because I knew She was working on the cells of the body, and so many people were going to Her. So I got up and She looked at me and said, "Look at your card. " I opened my card and there was the old name, Richard, and the new name, Narad. And then I broke down in tears, and I don't know how long I stayed with my head on Her feet.

I shall close these remembrances with a few anecdotes.

One time, on Darshan day, one of the Darshan Days, the rain was pouring down on all of us, absolutely drenching people. And so naturally they put umbrellas up all over. Mother came out. And She went back in. Udar told me the story. She said, "You see, Udar, I send down the Grace and they put their umbrellas up to


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stop it!" Udar said, "I will never have an umbrella again." Gauri, his daughter told me, "Yes, so then he trudged into Mother's rooms, over Her carpets and over the floors, pouring water! So we said to him one day, "Maybe you could wear a raincoat and just keep your head bare?" And so he did from then on."

Now, in 1980, on my birthday, I went to Nolini, who had been my guide for a long time. He would come to me in the night, and teach me - I don't know what, because with this sieve for a head I couldn't understand those things with the mind, even if I tried. When I approached him once after two weeks of intense teaching, I said, "You know, you are coming every night." "What of it? Maybe its your own soul!" - He just made light of it and wouldn't say anything. And just smiled and laughed. So on that day we presented him with 100 different flowers of Psychological Perfection - colours, sizes, fragrances, a huge platter. He took them and gave them to Anima and said "Be sure to give back the platter."

Oh, I have to tell you this funny story: it was about 1978 and I was exhausted, and I went to Nolini and I said, "Nolini, I need my batteries recharged." He stood like that, and he put his hands on my head for 2 minutes, and then he said, "They are recharged." And I could have floated out of that room. Of course Anima was there, remembering my old name, "She said, Richard, recharged, Richard, recharged."

So back to my birthday 1980. I had written him a long letter about the difficulties in Auroville, and asked why did we have to go through those difficulties. Very quietly and very deeply he said, "It need not be that way. You see. She is trying a thousand ways." Then he turned to Mary Helen and he said, "Your body..." then he turned to me and said, "and your body..." and then he pointed to himself and said, "and my body, we think they are different bodies, but they are not. They are all Her body. She has put a part of Herself into each of us." Truly. (talk on 18.2.2007)


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She is the Force, the inevitable Word

The magnet of our difficult ascent, ...

All Nature dumbly calls to her alone

To heal with her feet the aching throb of life

And break the seals on the dim soul of man

And kindle her fire in the closed heart of things.

(Savitri Pg. 314)


This is the knot that ties together the stars:

The Two who are one are the secret of all power,

The Two who are one are the might and right in things.

His soul, silent, supports the world and her,

His acts are her commandment's registers.

Happy, inert, he lies beneath her feet:

His breast he offers for her cosmic dance

Of which our lives are the quivering theatre,

And none could bear but for his strength within,

Yet none would leave because of his delight.

(...Pg. 63)

(Richard, aged 23, came to Ashram first in November, 1961. The Mother gave him the name Narad and, deeply interested in music, he is working to create a new and higher kind of music through his 'OM Choir'.)

***

Sweet Little Mother

I have a sweet little Mother

Who lives in my heart;

We are so happy together,

We shall never part. - The Mother


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"To please Sri Aurobindo"

  Prof. Arabinda Basu

- Prof. Arabinda Basu

Children of the Mother, I feel very hesitant to say what I will say this afternoon because Shraddhavan has asked me to speak of my impressions and experiences. I have always been told that one should not speak of one's experiences. Impressions I can, to some extent, but not my experiences. On the other hand one will have to touch upon one's experiences a little to explain what Sri Aurobindo has to say and to comment on those. I am doing this because Shraddhavan has been a very good friend for a number of years and I like to believe that she has a soft corner in her heart for me because of my special relationship with Nirodbaran. Every time I come to Savitri Bhavan I remember Nirodbaran - every time -because he was the spirit behind it and Savitri Bhavan is what it is because of his efforts and Shraddhavan's labour. So I will say what Shraddhavan asked me to speak about, including a few experiences.

I will first start with my name, Aravindam - not because it is very important as my name, but because I was named after Sri Aurobindo. I was named by my eldest maternal uncle who was a judge in the Nagpur High Court in Central Provinces and he was a great devotee of Sri Aurobindo and a very voracious reader of all his writings. I remember when I was only twelve or thirteen he asked me to bring out Sri Aurobindo's Essays on the Gita from the third shelf of his almirah. He said, "Go and read." I opened the page and started reading, stumbling with the English. He said, "No, it's not like that." And he went on reciting about three pages one after the other without stopping. He was a great devotee of Sri Aurobindo and a great reader. Once I asked him - I mention


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this particularly because I got a very good hint about the sadhana from him - I asked him, "Uncle, you are such a great devotee of Sri Aurobindo, such a voracious reader of his writings ... why don't you go to Pondicherry once?" He kept mum for a moment and then said, "You know I very much want to. But if I do I have to give myself to him. If I go to Sri Aurobindo I shall have to give myself to him. I am not ready for it yet." He never came. He gave me my name Aravinda. This is rather unique because in my generation there are 13 cousins, all of them named A.K. Basu. I am the only one without K. I am only Arabinda Basu.

About my inner contact... I remember once in school, some friends were saying that in the olden days there used to be yogis in India who could defy gravitation and float in the air and they regretted that today there are none. I said, "Why? There is Sri Aurobindo." It came spontaneously. I was not thinking of Him; suddenly I found myself saying, "There is Sri Aurobindo." So there must have been some contact somewhere, from where I don't know.

When I first joined college in 1934 there was a Professor of Philosophy called Dr. Mahendranath Sarkar. He used to come here very often. Once I asked him, "Will you please write to the Ashram, seeking permission for me to go for Darshan? But will you also say that I know my father will be very worried about it." He wrote, and they wrote back to say, "Yes, he has permission to come but Sri Aurobindo doesn't like that his father will be worried. Let him wait." This is 1934.

The first Darshan I had of Sri Aurobindo physically was on August 15, 1941. I was behind Dilip Kumar Roy. Sri Aurobindo was told that I would be behind Dilip and I could see that He had a very good look at me.

He was there, large as life, but also He was not there. He was so expansive I could feel Him everywhere. So it is very difficult to pin Him down! He was there, sitting - and He was not there. He looked at me very intensely and I could feel that He had seen all my life since I came to the earth and when I would go out of it.


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I am absolutely sure about it. He knows every detail of my life. This is not effusion, I mean it literally.

There is an institution in Calcutta called Sri Aurobindo Pathmandir; this was the first institution dedicated to Sri Aurobindo that was founded outside Pondicherry. I was connected with it since its inception. Once there was a meeting and I was about to go there; and as I was very hot, I took a shower. It was very nice and comfortable, I started singing. In the song, the word 'Mira' came over and over again. Suddenly a ton of peace came down on me. I can still feel it. It was very comfortable. It was cool as ice but not uncomfortable at all, very peaceful. I wondered why this peace had come - I am not a yogi! I went to the meeting. On the way I suddenly remembered that Mira was the name of the Mother! I wrote to Sri Aurobindo that I had this experience and asked, "Does the name of the Mother have this power?" He said, "He has got it, why does he ask? " Very affectionately He scolded me. "He has got it, why does he ask? " It was very nice.

When I came first in 1941 He asked Dilip, "What does he want to do?. " He wanted to see what I was going to be In my career. He was very interested. In 1942 I couldn't come: there was the 1942 Quit India Movement, the whole of India was at an absolute standstill. After that I used to come every year. In 1946 I came and stayed for a long time: over six weeks. This has to do with the Mother also, because 1 am going to read a letter I received from Sri Aurobindo which has a bearing on this. I went to the Mother and said, "I am going to stay for a long time. Could I have any work, to serve the Ashram?" She said, "Well, you stay here for a long time and don't worry, I will tell you. " Next day I went to Her and asked, ' Have you thought about it?'' "No, not yet. What is the hurry ? " The third time I went, She told me, "Aravindam, you are not very used to physical work are you? " It was very true - I was very tamasic about physical work. Mother . had caught it immediately. So I laughed and She laughed and we had a joint laughter. It was very sweet.


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This letter has to do with the same thing. I had a very great experience - which I am not going to tell you about because it has been said by yogis that to tell one's experiences lessens the power of having the experience. If it has become realisation - then, yes. What is realisation? Sri Aurobindo has defined it very simply and very directly: realisation is to realise what is Real - as real as yourself. Realisation is to make real to you what is Reality itself. Experiences come and go. They don't become part of our consciousness and being, so they are not realisations. They are there somewhere at the back of the head. They can always come back, you can recall them, but they are not a part of your being and consciousness. Until they have become that you can't call them realisations. And unless it has become part of your being and consciousness one should not talk about it.

But this has to do with what the Mother said about physical work. I had a great experience. I shall not explain what it was, but it has to do with the work. That is what I am going to read out:

"The realisation of the silent inactive Brahman is no bar to the dynamic side of the yoga. Often it is the first step. One must not associate it with the attachment to inertia. The silent Brahman is attached to nothing. Your mind is associated with inertia and attached to it, tamasic. "

And He gives His own example - He is so compassionate, so anxious to help any seeker, even a beginner - He says,

"Work itself is no solution. The spirit behind the work is important. The real remedy is to open oneself to the Force. When one gets free through the silent Brahman one does not go back to the old way of work. By the liberation one becomes free from the ego. One becomes an instrument of the Divine Force by receiving the Force and feels it working. Then inertia goes away. Till that happens, one has to work in the ordinary way. "

Don't give up work, go on working: even if I have desire or if I am tamasic, fight this inertia. Get up and walk instead of sitting down, so to speak. Do something. He says:


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"By this liberation one becomes free from the ego, one becomes an instrument of the Divine Force by receiving the Force and feels it working, then inertia goes away. "

That is the way to get rid of inertia says Sri Aurobindo - to invoke the Force.

"... until that can be done, one has to work in the ordinary way."

But don't stop working. By becoming an instrument of the Divine is the proper way. This is the height of Karma Yoga. In the last paragraph he gives His own example. It is most remarkable.

"I had realisation of supreme [sublime?] Nirvana first and it left the mind completely silent. There was complete cittavriddhinirodha - all the movements of the mind were completely stunned. There was no function of the mind at all. Entire silence. Then came the experience of action, not my own but from above."

It is important what He says:

"Then came the experience of action - not my own but from above."

One has to grow into it, unless it comes easily. This is very important, not only for me but for everybody who is seeking spiritual life. This is dated 26 June 1946. This is not signed by Sri Aurobindo because by then He was not autographing His books or signing letters. So it is not to be found in the three volumes of Letters on Yoga. If you try to find it you will not find it. But it is there in a book called Sri Aurobindo on Himself and the Mother which Kishore Gandhi edited. It may be in the Archives, I do not know. Now this was very important because it gave me a new direction to my seeking and my sadhana. Whether I am doing any sadhana or not is another question - but I got the guidance, very much.

In this connection, since I am talking about sadhana, I'll give you another story. Dilip Kumar Roy came back from abroad. He came, but he didn't go to meet the Mother. Mother sent Nolini Kanta Gupta: "Ask Dilip to come and see me. " Nolini went and


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said, "Mother wants to see you." Dilip said, "I'm not going." He was like a child in certain respects. Nolini could be very harsh. He said, "If you don't go, it will be discourteous." Dilip said, "All right. I'll go." When he went to the Mother, Mother said, "How are you? " Dilip said, "I want to stay here only if I am loved as Sri Aurobindo loved me - if you love me as Sri Aurobindo loved me, and everybody else loves me too." Mother said, "Do you think it is possible not to love you, whom Sri Aurobindo loved so much? Do you think it is possible? " Then she asked him straight away, " Why do you think we are here? " Dilip was fumbling: yoga, liberation, mukti..., so on and so forth. Mother said in three words the one single thing: "To please Sri Aurobindo."

That is our sadhana. "To please Sri Aurobindo." Dilip came back - I was staying with him - with tears in his eyes. "Do you know what Mother said?" 'To please Sri Aurobindo.' This is something connected with Sri Aurobindo. That is why I am relating it today. It gives a clue to the sadhana: "To please Sri Aurobindo." That is all - but the most difficult thing is to please Sri Aurobindo. Every fibre of your being has to be surrendered - completely, no reserve, nothing held back. Give, give, give. Sri Aurobindo Himself gave His own example by saying, "My way - surrender. " So if one is to take guidance of Sri Aurobindo one has to accept the way of surrender, as Sri Aurobindo Himself did.

I remember one letter that Huta wrote to the Mother. I think it was in 1966. She asked, "Can you guarantee that the work will be done?" Mother wrote back to say, "The Lord has not decided it yet. But I am doing it because I have been asked to do it. If it were somebody else I would not ask anybody to do it. It is so painful and so difficult. But I am going on doing it. Why? Because the Lord has asked me to. " This is the height of Karma Yoga. Mother was not young any more in Her body - this was in 1966 -but She said She would go on doing it until the last moment. Incidentally, I will mention something that Sri Aurobindo has said in this connection later.


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Once in Calcutta I heard certain people discussing the Mother. They had certain doubts about why the Mother was there at all -She is not Indian, nothing was known about Her sadhana, etcetera. Why is She here? There was a certain amount of scepticism about it. So I wrote to Sri Aurobindo. "I have heard this about the Mother, observations and enquiries. What do you have to say?" He gave me this message:

"The Mother is not a disciple of Sri Aurobindo. "

In fact I have read it somewhere printed that the Mother was the first disciple of Sri Aurobindo. It is not true. The Mother never had a Master. Abdul Baha, who was the grandson of Baha 'Ullah was very much impressed by the Mother and asked Her to address a meeting of his followers - of which Mother was not one. She said, "I don't know anything about it - your teaching, your sadhana. I know you, I respect you and admire you." He said, "Go and speak on my behalf." Which the Mother did, but She never had a Master, never had a guru. So this is the very first sentence:

"The Mother is not a disciple of Sri Aurobindo. " And the last:

"She has had the same realisation and experience as myself. The Mother s sadhana started when she was very young. When she was twelve or thirteen every night many teachers came to her and taught her various spiritual disciplines. Among them was a dark Asiatic figure. When we first met she immediately recognised me as that dark Asiatic figure whom she used to see a long time ago. "

So there was an occult connection, though She was in Paris and He was in India.

"That she should come here and work with me for a common goal was, as it were, a divine dispensation. "

It was not an accident, not a chance happening - a divine dispensation. Then He goes on to say:

"Mother was an adept of the Buddhist yoga and the yoga of the Bhagavad Gita before she came to India. Her yoga was


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moving towards a grand synthesis. After this, it was natural that she should come here. She has helped and is helping to give a concrete form to my yoga.

This he has said also in a letter to Barin: "My yoga was all theoretical" - this is not speculative, but practically put - "but when the Mother came she gave concrete shape and form to the yoga."

"She has helped and is helping to give a concrete form to my yoga. This would not have been possible without her cooperation. One of the two great steps in the yoga is to take refuge in the Mother. "

This is Sri Aurobindo's message. This was dictated to Nirodbaran. Nirodbaran read it back to Sri Aurobindo, and He said, "Send it to Arindam. " So this is it.

There is a little more which I have not made public. Once I was asked to take a class on Essays on the Gita - for adults. My method was that each student had to read one paragraph, and if she didn't understand anything she should stop and ask me. Once, it was Kumud who was reading - she was part of the class. She suddenly stopped and asked "Arindam-da, what is the meaning of this word?" I looked at it. I had never seen it, never heard of it. Immediately, lo and behold, I heard a male voice, right here [indicating behind his ear]: "That which cannot be made smaller. " He thought, 'This one is in the professor's chair and he doesn't know the meaning; I have to tell him.' So He knew that I was taking a class; He knew that I had never seen the word; He came and helped me. The word was 'imminuable'. It doesn't occur in the English language. It was coined by Sri Aurobindo Himself. I came back home, looked in the Oxford Dictionary - it was not there. I went to the Library, looked in the Dictionary - it was not there. Somehow it struck me, 'min' as in minimum -maybe from there. So, that which cannot be made smaller -imminuable. He has made many words like that. Another is ineffugable' 'Fugere' in Latin means 'to fly away, escape from': so, 'That from which one cannot escape.' Once in an article He


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wrote 'Churchianity'. "Christianity has now become very dry; it has all become Churchianity. " Somebody at the Press corrected it to Christianity - Sri Aurobindo said, "Who has corrected my English?" [laughter]

Once I had an experience which I will tell you about. I don't mind telling you about this. We lived in a large house because we had a large family. I used to go up on the terrace every evening, something drew me there compulsively. I used to see a figure about twelve feet tall - twelve feet or even more - with a trident in his hand. It looked like Shiva. Every evening it drew me and I went there day after day, evening after evening. I was very struck by it. So I wrote to Sri Aurobindo that I was seeing this thing every evening. 'What is it?' He answered, "It is one of the attendants of Shiva. He has come to do something special in you which you don't know anything about but will come to know when it is finished. "Then I stopped seeing the figure. Sri Aurobindo said, "Now the work has been done." I have told you about this personal experience because you may have some visions like this and you don't know what it is all about. There is a certain occult reason why these figures come, what they do in you and why. But if you seek the answer you will get it.

Now, these are examples of how Sri Aurobindo has helped me in little ways and in very big ways:

Once I was lecturing at a meeting in England, not an academic audience, a mixed audience. Suddenly about half way through the lecture an old lady stood up and said, "I see a figure behind you!" I said, "Please wait. Let me finish and we'll talk alone about it later." They saw very distinctly a Tibetan figure behind me. They said, "A Tibetan figure, about your height, a little more maybe." Sri Aurobindo was there to help me to lecture. This I am telling you openly and frankly because you can also believe that He is always helping you, whether you know it or not. Why should He come and tell me the meaning of the word 'imminuable'?

There have been cases when I have been stuck with a problem in Sri Aurobindo's philosophy. I have gone to sleep with the


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problem, and in the early morning I have the solution, without trying to find the solution or the book, clear as crystal. I wrote to Sri Aurobindo about it. 'You have got the right note' was his response. He was always encouraging, always giving help, so that you can proceed, you can carry on. He never discouraged. He never said 'No, this is not right.' If it was not right, He would say so in a very, very quiet way so that you were not discouraged. Over and over again this has happened to me. The moment you turn to Him, the help is there. The difficulty is that we don't always turn to Him, unfortunately. That is the ego: 'I can do it myself.' You can't do anything yourself. You are a puppet in the hands of Prakriti. But there is a psychic being in you which has a direct connection to the Divine through Sri Aurobindo. So, I have both the egoistic and the psychic beings and I choose the greater victory. I say "I", but most of us are like that. So, make a choice.

Mother says over and over again, "Be conscious of yourself, of each movement, each thought, each feeling, each action. Why are you doing it? " This means detachment from what you are feeling, thinking, doing. Go inwards. In a letter Sri Aurobindo says all this stress on action has come from the West. We have to go within - and within is not six inches only. Go deep down, find the self, wait till the Grace of the Self will tell you what to do -then do it. Till then you go on working in the ordinary way. Some of you at least may know that the Bhagavad Gita says that those who work with desire, let them go on doing it; don't stop them from doing their work. Your right is to the work, not to the fruit. But those who work with the desire for some secular fruit let them go on doing it. Don't disturb them. Because if you do, they will become tamasic, utterly inert, which is a reverse movement. These are very subtle points in sadhana, but they are very clearly stated, there is no confusion possible.

So my impression of Sri Aurobindo is this: that He is nowhere and everywhere.

I will end with one experience which is rather unique - this I want to tell you even though I really shouldn't. Once I went to a


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subtle physical plane where Sri Aurobindo stood wearing a headdress that was unique, beautiful, and it seemed to me that He could take the whole universe in two hands and crush it - or re-make it. So much Power! Every power was concentrated there in His two hands. The floor was very uncertain, nothing fixed. I came and told the Mother. She said:

"Yes, you have been there. The experience of the floor means that nothing is fixed there - it is subtle physical. The soil is changing. The only thing fixed there is Sri Aurobindo. "

So I know He is there.

I told somebody about a year ago that He said, "I am giving great moral protection to India. " Because all the trouble... India is going through great trouble of all kinds. But He is holding it together. But then there are other people also in the spiritual life who are doing the same. Sri Aurobindo said it - perhaps many of you do not know it - that all the great spiritual figures of India are working for the same goal.

I will end by saying one thing about which there is grave doubt in people's minds and this has to be cleared. One gentleman has written a book on Sri Aurobindo saying that Sri Aurobindo is a failure - He was ill; He died; He was a failure. I took it up. I researched. I found that He never stated that He was going to transform Himself down to the physical - never. He said, "If I did that I would call myself supramental". And when He said "I", He referred to His external nature. He meant that if He transformed His external nature He would call himself supramental. What is within the physical is ail there, intact, but the yoga is to bring what is within out. And that has not happened yet. But you will remember the Mother's message inscribed on the Samadhi. It is not addressed to Sri Aurobindo, but to the material envelope of Sri Aurobindo, His body. She says, 'You who have tried all, achieved all, accomplished all' - the body. So what He was trying to do according to His own admission was to bring down the Supermind into contact with Matter. And His body was material. He said, "If I don't succeed nobody will. " The aim was


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not full transformation but only bringing of the Supermind and putting it in contact with Matter that is all. In a letter He says very openly:

"I need neither liberation nor supramentalisation. " He doesn't need anything.

"Why am I doing it? Perhaps because I have been sent for it; perhaps to make it more possible. "

He was very careful with His words. He never made any exact claim; but: "at least make it more possible."

Not only did He make it more possible, it was actualised. The moment He left His body the supramental had come down and charged His body for 111 hours - this is the literal truth. A lot of people saw that golden light emanating from His chest area filling the whole room. How did it happen? A lifeless body vibrant with supramental energy. No sign of death anywhere. The Mother asked the authorities to send for the French doctor. Under the law they have to come and certify. They came and said, "There is no sign of death here. You can do what you like." Why?

So, one has to understand that Sri Aurobindo has fulfilled His yoga - more than 100%. And that is the one sign that the yoga is going to be successful. Don't have any doubt about it. If you are not fully convinced at least don't have doubt.

Sri Aurobindo started a new chapter in world history - the chapter is on the supramental world: a world of harmony, love, patience, amity, concord. This has started already. There has been so much trouble in the world but also you find the community of nations coming together. A lot of people are going and protesting against G-Summit meetings in favour of people who are poor. Ordinary people, common people are fighting the great powers which are concentrating their great power and wealth, possession and privilege - and the ordinary people don't want it. Why this change? This change has been brought about by the supramental power working in Matter. There is so much trouble we are suffering from but one perhaps does not know this. Sri Aurobindo said:


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"The first work of the Supramental will be to break down all the mental moulds - morality, education, culture, everything is to be shattered, because the new cannot come unless the old is completely struck. "

And the old is mental, and the new is supramental - vijnana in the Upanishadic language.

Sri Aurobindo has got a line in Savitri: A god come down and greater by the fall. And He says in an essay on the vijananamaya purusha that the supramental being is a god on earth. Who is the supramental being? You may know evolution is going on, if even within one person. Mother, once on a birthday of Nolini Kanta Gupta wrote, "Towards the Supermind." He was in the Overmind, and not only Nolini. There is a Parsi mystic Meher-baba - She said, "He is in the Overmind". So evolution is going on, not only amongst disciples of Sri Aurobindo but outside also. It is a universal phenomenon. The supermind is nobody's personal property. You can't claim it for yourself.

There was a group in Benares where one woman, said to be the world's greatest Sanskrit scholar, said, "My gurudev has revealed something to me. I would like you to come and listen to it." I was staying with this scholar myself. He said, "When she told me what it was I found it was consistent with my own guru's teaching, so I went and the whole thing started, the whole movement." He said that it is very similar to Sri Aurobindo's. Once a woman came to this scholar's house where we were staying and said, "Why don't you come to me once?" I had no business to go. I was not their disciple, J did not belong to the group, so I didn't go. But she came and said, "Why don't you come once to my place?" I thought perhaps I should, so I went. This developed into very great things. She told me that once they had a theory about 'bija' - some seed falling into a human being. I asked her humourously, "What kind of seed - gram beans?" She said "No - something else." I said, "You are telling of this bija, and Mother is a foreigner; Her body has not been Indian." She admonished me, "Don't speak like that - these are golden beans. The Mother is


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Herself the Supreme Shakti, the original Shakti, come down here for a particular transformative work." This is a Brahmin woman talking about the Mother.

Then she wrote a letter to Sri Aurobindo and asked me to post it. Afterwards I wrote a letter to Sri Aurobindo and asked about what was happening there, saying it seemed very similar to His idea but the technical terms were different. He said that I should make inquiries. So I went and probed and became very close to this woman. She was a great yogini both in knowledge and in power but absolutely egoless. She came here twice - she couldn't see Sri Aurobindo, of course - because she was interested in the movement. She sent inquiries through me. So this evolution is going on and also other movements similar to Sri Aurobindo's.

But, I will add this: these people have got somewhere some kind of intuition. One gentleman, a great scholar, thought he was going to be transformed. The woman who was guiding this group told me it was not to be. She said he would not get it, their guru would not get it, they themselves would not get it. It would be achieved by someone outside their circle. She told me this in so many words.

I was surprised at their procedures. For example, she had asked this great scholar not to take any bath, - in the Benares heat! - and not to eat salt. A great tapasya! but he went on doing it until the last of his days.

I asked her, "What are you doing? why are you putting restrictions on him? He is a very old man." She replied, "Our work is only the cleaning of the path. We are doing only the preliminary work. The real work is with Sri Aurobindo; He is the only one who knows anything about it." She told me that at the end of the day He would have achieved what He wanted to achieve. She said 'Don't have the slightest doubt.' That was her foresight: that Sri Aurobindo would achieve what He had set out to achieve even if He leaves the body.

But I should add that His aim was not personal transformation on the physical level. His pursuit was only to bring the supermind


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and bring it into contact with matter, that is all. And therefore I remind you once again of Mother's message to His material envelope: "You who have tried all; achieved all..." It is a miracle that it should happen at the very last moment when He left his body. That is the divine dispensation. Nobody knows why it should have happened then and not a moment before. That is the divine in itself; no one else knows about it.

Sri Aurobindo said there is a divine calendar with a fixed day when this will happen. So we are waiting for it. Meanwhile we are to give ourselves as much as possible with humility, with surrender, with the conviction that it will happen. Why? Because it is inevitable. The last word of Sri Aurobindo about the yoga is: "IT IS INEVITABLE." We must go on patiently, with humility, conviction and aspiration. That is all we can do, because the sadhana is: "To please Sri Aurobindo." (A talk at Savitri Bhavan on 25th April 2009)

(Prof. Arabinda Basu (1918 - 2012) had first darshan of Sri Aurobindo and the Mother on 15th August, 1941. Several important letters on the Mother were written to him by Sri Aurobindo.)

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Blessed are those - 0088-2.png

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Never saw but always remember (Rama Narayana)

- Rama Narayana

The whole universe remembers the Mother, because She is the Universal Mother. The whole world remembers Her because She is the Divine Mother. Amongst all I remember Her because She remembers me. Though She is in me and responsible for my becoming I know only when it influenced my surface consciousness. I was then a student of eighth class in 1971. I got the information about Sri Aurobindo and the Mother, got the address of Sri Aurobindo Ashram, Pondicherry and I started writing to Her and receiving blessings. An immense joy was sown into my integral being and the course of my life took a new direction. A back-bencher in the class came to the front. All my attentions gradually turned from external to internal, studying books on spirituality and self development became my passion and sustenance. I learned about integral education and integral yoga; I studied them regularly besides my books on academics. Prayers and meditations became part of my life. The raison d'etre, the purpose of my life became clearer. It revealed before me newer, broader, higher realms which are to be attained. The path appeared ever progressive. Now I feel, remembering Mother can be casual; but it becomes altogether different when She remembers you and takes charge of you. It is like a goldsmith choosing a piece of gold. The piece of gold becomes completely under the control of the goldsmith. He puts it into fire, hammers, chisels, carves and drills until a beautiful ornament is made out of it. I am grateful to be chosen, I remember Her every time I am subjected to a process. Of course, it is difficult to say when I am not a subject. It reminds me of the following from Sri Aurobindo:


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"He who chooses the Infinite has been chosen by the Infinite. "

Synthesis of Yoga, P-53

I was attending Sri Aurobindo Study Circle weekly twice. Then I became instrumental in opening a study circle and its activities, in my teens, in my native village. My participation in Sri Aurobindo Study Circles continued for long time wherever I was there in Odisha till my late thirties. I started participating during my teens in seminars and conferences on Sri Aurobindo's philosophy and education and I still like to do it. Collected Works of the Mother and Sri Aurobindo were my real source of knowledge, inspiration, strength and sustenance and they are still. My nature became Her tool and was subjected to change and transformation. I am grateful to Her for all that She is doing with me and in my being.

In my early twenties, social obligations became stronger on me to go for a job with good salary, to get married to take care of my aging parents and looking after the ancestral property and to do some business. I could not give importance to any of these. Listening to the inner voice and leading an inner life was my soul pre-occupation. The following verse from Sri Aurobindo was pre-dominantly occupying my integral being then:

"Let Fate do with me what she will or can;

I am stronger than death and greater than my fate;

My love shall outlast the world, doom falls from me

Helpless against my immortality.

Fate's law may change, but not my spirit's will. "

Savitri p-432

I could pay least attentions to suggestions, advices, from my parents, relatives and friends. After my college study, I decided to join Sri Aurobindo Integral Education Centre as a teacher. It was a voluntary job. It was my sincere choice. I was receiving Rs.150/- per month to maintain myself. It was a joy to live in a classroom of the school and work tirelessly. Entire day and night was dedicated towards the chosen work. The entire being was


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charged by Her energy and consciousness. Her voice and inspiration from within were the only things to be heard and lived up to. The work of teaching and all ancillary works of the school were my sadhana. I dared to consent to take the responsibility of a Principal of another Sri Aurobindo Integral Education Centre at the age of twenty one. It was fully clear to me that She will be guiding me at every step of any job provided to me to deliver. I need not to be worried; after all, it is Her work and we are the instruments. Gradually it became clear that I came down upon earth as a being through my human parents, but I do not belong to them. I am a part of this humanity upon earth irrespective of the country in which I am born. The narrowness of religion and the caste and sub-caste of my parents did not interest me. Neither had they bound me.

I grew with the children (students) and teachers of Sri Aurobindo Integral Education Centres in Odisha. I became the Principal of three different Integral schools in different times at the time of their need. It was also a need for my progress. I learnt a lot from students and their parents, colleagues, managers and different officials while leading the schools. The outputs from the educational experiments, done then are still effective today after 30 years. The following statement of the Mother became a mantra for me:

"It is not for our family, it is not to secure good position, it is not to earn money, it is not to obtain a diploma, that we study. We study to learn, to know, to understand the world, and for the sake of the joy that it gives us. "

June 1967/CWM Vol-12

During the third year of my teachership I became very interested to learn and experience the Free Progress system of education. I lived two years in Sri Aurobindo Ashram, Delhi Branch and worked in Mirambika dedicated to Free Progress. I got a glimpse of it by living in that conducive atmosphere. I am grateful for having given me the opportunity. Since then my insight and


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approach to education, life and world got properly orientated - as I believe.

It is worth noting that the Shramashibira programme visualized and pioneered by Prof. Chittaranjan Das (Chittabhai) in Odisha geared me to work for the society in true spirit. The programmes are happening twice a year each for ten days in any one of the integral schools or institutions dedicated to the ideals of the Mother and Sri Aurobindo. More than a hundred of participants (sometimes more than two hundred) live together for ten days. They study together any one of the works of the Mother or Sri Aurobindo for four hours, physical labour offering for four hours and open discussion for two hours per day. This programme has led us deep into the teachings of the Mother and Sri Aurobindo and helped us to do yoga in the world while leading an ordinary life. As Sri Aurobindo says in His aphorism:

No. 107 - "Hard is to be in the world, free yet living the life of ordinary men; but because it is hard, therefore it must be attempted and accomplished".(CWM- Vol 1O-Pg l94)

This aphorism became another mantra for me till today to lead life in the world for Her. Mother's explanation with questions and answers on this aphorism, the essence and consciousness that is conveyed by this aphorism penetrated to the depths of my being. The cells of my body resonate with this. It makes me free from the result of the work that I do. Thus every work becomes an aid for inner growth. I was one of the executive body members in the "New Life Education Trust" (named by the Mother), Odisha for a period of twelve years. It was an opportunity to do Her work with a wider perspective through all the hundreds of Sri Aurobindo Integral Education Centres and study circles in Odisha. Prof. Prapatti and Sri Ramakrishna Das (Babaji Maharaj) being the instrumental leaders.

I got married in 1993 with Uma, who was also a teacher in one of the Integral Schools. Our marriage was an act of battle against present social institutions as stated by Sri Aurobindo in His following statement:


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that She was with us. Financial and material requirements followed us though we did not have enough resources to support ourselves. We were literally happy in spite of uncertainty of a house and finances as if we were not affected by the absence of money or its affluence. We were showered by Her grace to experience the following words of Sri Aurobindo for some stretch of time.

"The ideal Sadhaka in this kind is one who if required to live poorly can do so live and no sense of want will affect him or interfere with the full inner play of the divine consciousness and if he is required to live richly, can so live and never for a moment. ...

... "The Divine Will is all for him and the Divine Ananda. "

In due course of time funds were arranged for a house in Auroville. Certainty in living in Auroville, to become Her instruments in realization of the Dream became clear. I joined Auroville as a science teacher in Transition school. Later I got an opportunity to see the functioning of Auroville with a wider view by working in SAIIER and being a participant in different working groups.

Now I am passing through a phase where the following appears very significant:

"Nothing could satisfy but its delight:

Its absence left the greatest actions dull,

Its presence made the smallest seem divine. "

Savitri-Pg 305

(Rama Narayana came to Auroville in 2001. He has been working in the administrative team of Sri Aurobindo International Institute of Educational Research (SAIIER) since March 2007.)

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My closest Friend

  Loretta

-Loretta

I was never interested in the usual daily life. From the age of five I only wanted to be an artist and create beauty. I received a Bachelor of Arts degree in Sculpture and I was working on a Master of Fine Arts Degree in ceramics when Indian yogis started teaching in America. I became interested in meditation, so on January 11, 1969, I went to India for a six week vacation.

The India I came to was very deeply peaceful and spiritual. I met people who were deep and wise. I had never met people like this before. I loved everything about India, especially the idea of personal progress, called sadhana in yoga. I forgot about America. Instead of going back, I went to the Himalayas to do sadhana in different ashrams. I learned to speak Hindi and I put on the white saree of a spiritual seeker. I was given the name "Sadhana".

After three years I thought I had better return to America. But I had never done any travelling, only sadhana, so first I planned to travel down to Kanya Kumari at the Southernmost tip of India, and then go to Bombay and fly home.

On my way South I had an experience of the immortality of my physical body. I had the realization that my body didn't have to deteriorate and die. Death was not inevitable. It made me very happy. It seemed so simple and I wondered why I never thought of it before. I went around telling everybody, "Listen, you don't have to die. Your body doesn't have to fall apart. Isn't that wonderful?" Someone told me, "There is a lady called "The Mother" in the Sri Aurobindo Ashram in Pondicherry who is doing this work."

I was staying in an ashram with a good library, and I found Mother's book, "Words of Long Ago". .After three years of sadhana


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I had many spiritual questions and Mother answered all of them in Her book. I wanted to go and see Her, to tell Her about my experience of immortality and to learn more from Her. I could see Her in my imagination. She was beautiful, graceful and loving in a long white gown. I was sitting at Her feet, telling Her everything in my heart.

I wrote Mother a postcard, telling Her all about myself and that I was coming to see Her. I planned to follow my postcard to Mother by continuing down to the tip of India and then going up to Pondicherry. On the way I came down with hepatitis and by the time I arrived at the Vivekananda Puram at the Southernmost tip of India, I was too sick and weak to go further. All I could do was lie in bed. An American girl named Christy came through, looking for a friend. She said she was going to Pondicherry on the train.

I couldn't think about how to take a train but I asked her to take me along because I was going to see Mother. The two days on the train are lost out of my life. All I can remember is arriving at the Ashram gate in a rickshaw pulled by a coolie.

It was 22 February, 1972 and the Ashram was in the midst of the Sri Aurobindo Centenary celebrations. Mother had come out on Her terrace to give Darshan on the 21st. People said that She would give Darshan again on 29 February. The Ashram and the streets were crowded with thousands of people.

We went to the Ashram Reception Room to ask for a place to stay. At that time, the Ashram Reception was divided into two parts by a partition. I was too weak to stand up, so I lay down on the floor. On the other side of the partition I could hear Christy telling someone that I was sick and we needed a room. I heard him say that there wasn't any possibility of getting a room because of the Centenary celebrations and terrible overcrowding.

Christy brought the man around the partition to see me. Suddenly, I stood up and in a most formal and polite manner I explained our difficulty and asked for a room. Miraculously he gave us a room. It was in the Auroville Guest House which was an old Tamil house with walls over 18 inches thick. Our tiny


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windowless room was only large enough for two small beds. I lay on my bed, unable to do anything. I was a weak empty shell without a personality. Christy went into the bazaar and brought me fruits and curd to eat.

One day I took a rickshaw to the Ashram and sat at the Samadhi. As I leaned against the marble wall of the Samadhi I felt something come into my body from deep inside. I knew it came from Sri Aurobindo and that He had healed me of the hepatitis. From that moment I gained joy, strength and health. One by one I could see the parts of my personality comeback. I started visiting various places in the Ashram. It was full of white light. I breathed nectar in the streets. Beauty was everywhere. I hardly noticed the great crowds of people. I felt completely at home.

I heard about Auroville and that Americans were living there. I wanted to see them after living in the jungle for 3 years. I didn't know anything about Auroville. I got on the Auroville bus and I got off at the Matrimandir in the center of Auroville and walked around to look for Americans.

In February, 1972, the Matrimandir was just a huge hole in the ground with steps carved into the red earth on all sides going down to the bottom of the excavation. Tamil workmen wearing only loincloths and turbans were coming up the steps carrying earth in wide shallow containers on their head. The people I met were concentrating on their work and did not want to stop and talk. There was nothing else to see except a small Banyan tree and the Matrimandir Worker's Camp, which was made of a rectangular woven palm leaf panels laid on tall thin poles which were tied together at the top to form high triangles. Viewed from the window of the bus, Auroville was a vast, empty desert. I couldn't see a blade of green grass. The earth was very red and the sky was very blue and very big. There was nothing else to see.

I returned to Pondicherry to wait for February 29, when Mother would give Her next Darshan. Because of the hepatitis I forgot about my experience of immortality and why I had come. I forgot about the postcard I wrote to Mother. I was in a hurry to go across


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India to Bombay and fly to America and I planned to leave right after Mother's Darshan.

The news came that Mother was too ill to give Darshan. Instead, there would be a special meditation in the Ashram Playground. During the meditation they played Mother's organ music. Then there was a great silence. As I sat in the silence I saw a wide flame on top of my head. I thought, "What shall I do with this?" Then it occurred to me that because I was in Mother's Ashram, out of respect, I should place Mother in the flame so that I would be at Her Feet. As soon as I did that, the flame vanished into my head, and suddenly everything was much clearer than before, as though my consciousness had greatly increased.

After that I wanted to see Mother very much but, because I was leaving for America, I wanted to see Her as soon as possible. I was told to go and ask for pass from Madhav Pandit, one of Mother's secretaries. I sat down at his desk and said that I wanted to see Mother. We had never met, I was one of thousands of visitors and I had not spent much time in the Samadhi during the week I had been there. I didn't mention my name. He said, "We have your postcard." How he knew who I was, I will never know. Then he told me it would take a long time before I could see Mother, because there were many people and Mother was very occupied. I said, "Then I will have to forego having Mother's Darshan because I am leaving for America the day after tomorrow," and I got up and walked out of his office.

The next day when I came into the Samadhi someone I had never seen before came up to me and said, "Madhav Pandit has got you Darshan with the Mother for the day after tomorrow. Go to see him and get your pass." How this man knew who I was, I will also never know.

Instead of preparing to leave, I got my pass and prepared for Mother's Darshan. I made a painting of my experience in the Playground to give to Her. I started to dream again that I was sitting at Her feet and opening my heart to Her.


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On the appointed morning I joined the line of people going up to Mother's room on the second floor and waited my turn, sitting on the terrace outside Mother's room. When my name was called I went in. It was not at all as I had dreamed it would be. I wasn't going to be alone, sitting at the feet of the gracious, beautiful, loving person I had dreamed of. The room was full of people and, once again, I had joined a line. At first all I saw was Mother sitting on a chair in the centre of the room: She was very small and She appeared elderly and frail, and Her head, which I saw in complete profile, was bent very far forward. In an instant, all of my cherished dreams were dashed to pieces. It was a powerful physical shock. Suddenly I couldn't understand where I was or what I was supposed to do. Looking back, I know that I was overpowered by the tremendous consciousness and force in Mother's room.

Desperately I tried to collect myself. With great effort I focused on the people in front of me, so I could copy their behavior. Each person knelt down in front of Mother and looked up into her eyes very intently. They seemed to want to look into Mother's eyes as much as they could. Then they put their head on Mother's lap.

When my turn came, I knelt down in front of Mother and looked up into Her face. My earlier impression of age and frailty disappeared. Mother was the youngest person I ever saw. She was shining as though there was a light inside Her, coming through Her. Her skin was as white and smooth as a baby's. She looked extremely alive. Her eyes were blue and very alive. There was an atmosphere of clarity and consciousness around Her. I gave Her the painting of my experience in the Playground meditation. She asked, "For me?", and I said, "yes." We said other things inside. Her voice was lovely, light and musical. Somehow She knew I spoke English. The attendants kept telling me to put my head on Mother's lap so I did and She blessed me with a strong touch on my head which I feel even today.

For the first time in my life, I was home. I was going to stay here forever. Everything that I ever wanted was right here. I would not get up no matter what anybody said. In fact, I was never


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going to move again. Then, without my knowing it, some force pulled me back and up off my knees and out of Mother's room. I was not conscious of what I was doing or of moving on my own energy until I was halfway down the lower flight of stairs, near the Meditation Hall.

As I walked through the Samadhi, and out of the Ashram main building, I felt free, completely free, like a flying bird. It was a wonderful feeling. I told myself that I was now free to return to America. I could feel that Mother had taken away whatever it was inside me that had bound me like some kind of glue to my old ways and habits.

The next afternoon, I found myself living at the centre of Auroville in the Matrimandir Worker's Camp. I could never remember how it happened. Rooms were scarce, and people had trouble finding any place to live, but after a short while, that room was given to me permanently. I walked around thinking of Mother all the time. Everything that was America faded away for the second time and I didn't remember anything about my life before I came to India.

The second night I was there, at about 2:00 a.m., I was lying in bed and I became aware that someone was speaking to me. A beautiful, graceful, loving woman in a long, white gown was leaning over me and asking me, "Are you doing all right? Is your room all right? Are you happy? Are you comfortable? Do you have everything you need?" I knew it was Mother. Thirty five years later I learned that Mother told people in the Ashram that she was so busy during the day that She had to go out to see people at 2:00 a.m. Following Her usual schedule that night she had come to see me in my room at the Matrimandir Worker's Camp.

I could feel Mother's interest in me and Her love and care. I never felt so much love or saw such beauty. I had never experienced anything even close to this before. I was so touched by someone who loved me more than anyone else had ever loved me. Then and there I gave myself to Mother and accepted Her as my Guru.


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I spent my first days in the Camp looking around. Among other things I saw that the Matrimandir Worker's Camp kitchen needed organization. Through my mind went a single thought: "Maybe I should do something to fix this kitchen." I don't know why I had that thought. I liked giving people food, but I never learned to cook. I had always avoided kitchen work. I wanted to be an artist.

I wrote to Mother to ask for permission to live in Auroville. I didn't ask for work. Mother sent back a message: "If you want to be an Aurovilian, first you have to fix the kitchen at the Matrimandir." I wasn't surprised that She had heard my single thought about fixing the kitchen. With nothing but my faith and my ego and Her help I started to "fix" the Matrimandir Worker's Camp kitchen. The most important thing for me was Mother. My life was an endless conversation with Her.

There may have been about a hundred and fifty people living in Auroville at that time. Our kitchen fed about fifty people who worked on the Matrimandir, in the Matrimandir Nursery and at the Camp. We came from many countries. The requirement to join Auroville was that you had to want to "work for human unity". It seemed like a simple idea but living close together we had to get along in difficult and primitive living and working conditions. We didn't care about that, but there was no choice except to try to work for human unity with people from other countries we didn't know. It seemed that the simple words "human unity" encompassed every part of Sri Aurobindo's yoga.

The atmosphere of Auroville was full of vibrating promises. I never thought about what it meant to build a real city, but I could feel beautiful atmospheres rising out of the earth and vibrating in the air in different colors. They are still here. From time to time in quiet moments I experience them. I believe this is what Mother and Sri Aurobindo were doing to create Auroville, not the Auroville that is buildings and roads and water systems, but the Auroville that is the many and varied pathways of human evolution and future development.


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Looking back, I can see that the Matrimandir was already here, complete in its entirety, even though it just looked like a hole in the ground. I experienced its presence then just as I experience it today, forty-two years later, only now I can sit in the inner chamber.

The bottom of the excavation was my special place. In the early days I loved to sit there for long periods of time. I was sitting there one very early evening in the first week of June, 1972, when I heard a high, beautiful voice singing celestial sounding music. The singing filled the excavation but I couldn't see anyone. After listening for some time I heard words in my mind, "Who is this person singing?" Then I saw someone swooping and flying around in the air, high above the pillars. It was a slender, supple, very active woman in a long white gown. She had white skin and green eyes and long red hair, like Mother. Her gown and hair floated and billowed in the wind as she soared above me. She looked like She was having a wonderful time. The air was filled with joy as I watched her flying up and down in the Matrimandir construction, looping in and out between the pillars, singing and soaring around in the excavation. It never occurred to me to think about whether I had a vision or if I actually saw Her. Sitting there, a poem came to me.

Mother makes music in the Matrimandir,

Delicate, soaring celestial sounds;

Red hair, white skin, green eyed being

Transforming us by entering us.

Was there any choice? I do not know.

Lo! I have offered up my being.

Years later I saw Huta's painting, named by Mother "The Spirit of Auroville". It is a picture of the woman I saw flying in the Matrimandir excavation. The only difference is that Huta's painting looks slightly blurred, not in sharp focus the way I saw her that day.

The kitchen work was very hard for me. I had never managed anything before. Food supplies were sparse and scarce and


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everything was much harder to do than it would have been in the West. Without Mother's concern and involvement, I couldn't have done it. When I had been there for less than four months I wanted to escape from kitchen work and work full time on the Matrimandir where I thought everybody else was having a lot more fun than I was. I wanted to go back to being an artist. I thought it would be easier to do something I already knew how to do.

By then I had read of Mother's connections with ancient Egypt and I remembered that I had a passionate interest in ancient Egypt during my childhood. I was reading stories, about Mother giving Ashramites work for their inner progress in the yoga. I knew that traditionally a guru gave a disciple work for the disciple's growth. So I wrote to Mother,

"27 August 1972

In April you sent a message that I should fix the Matrimandir Workers' Camp Kitchen. The kitchen now works well.... I feel that centuries ago I worked at decorating pyramids and that I was close to you and served you. I would like to know if you remember this. I am ready again to decorate your temple, if you feel it is best. Wherever you want me to work, I will work.

Your loving child, Loretta"

My note was returned with Mother's dictated reply:

"28 August, 1972

It is now time to work. We are not here to copy the past, but to exceed. Your work is quite satisfactory. I send you my love and blessings." I stayed in the kitchen.

I sent a letter to Mother whenever I had something to write to Her. She always answered my letters. I could feel from Her answers that She took what I said very seriously. I asked Her if I should keep my Indian name and She said no.

About a year after I came, I wrote to Her about some inner experiences that I had and asked Her for training. Shyam Sundar, who took many letters to Mother, only told me that Mother said, "What She says is true." By then I already knew that the training would be received inwardly.


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Decades later I read Her exact response in Shyam Sundar's book, Down Memory Lane. "17.2.73 = For a person asking training on a certain matter, Mother said that she cannot give it mentally, it is to be received inwardly." I still receive this training. It is part of working for Mother and Sri Aurobindo.

I wanted to see Mother all the time but that wasn't possible. She was very busy. I decided that at least I wanted to see Her in between public Darshans as long as I was at a place in my own progress where I would benefit from Her help. She always allowed me to come to Her room when I asked. It was pure heaven to prepare for Her Darshan, to climb the beloved stairs and to sit again in the rarefied air on the terrace outside Her room, waiting to be called.

Each time I entered Her room, I entered again into the clarity of the consciousness around Her. Each time I saw Her incredibly young, fresh and alive. I would kneel at Her feet and She would look deeply into my eyes. My consciousness wasn't developed enough to know what was happening inside me, but seeing Mother was all I ever wanted. Once She smiled at me. I went into bliss. For days all I could say was, "Mother smiled at me!" "She smiled at me!" Someone I said it to replied, "Yes, I know, She smiled at me once." -One day She looked like the most beautiful tiny pale pink rose bud and that soft, tender beauty stayed with me for weeks. One day She gave me a Mantra. Every time I saw Her I was transported into a state of light and joy which lasted for days. I tried to hold on to it as long as I could but eventually it would somehow fade away. Still, looking back, I realized that all the time everyone here was living in a wonderful atmosphere which carried us through our days.

One morning while sitting on Mother's Terrace, I had a vision. I knew it was Mother's universal consciousness. I was peaceful and comfortable and I looked to my left. It seemed as if everything that could possibly exist was on my left side, pouring down in a never-ending stream. I saw landscapes, worlds, people, animals, houses, cities, mountains and more, moving and changing. I could


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sense entire worlds behind the things I saw. It went on pouring down for some time. Instinctively I knew that it was only a very small part of Mother's Consciousness.

Mother gave Darshan from Her second floor terrace four times a year. I always tried to prepare myself to be open to Her. When I stood in the street below, one among thousands of people, no matter how far away I was, I always knew when Mother looked at me. I went into bliss and the feeling stayed with me for days.

Mother left Her body at 7:25 p.m. on 17 November, 1973. I was staying in Golconde Guest House in the Ashram. I couldn't leave my kitchen duties often and I hardly ever stayed overnight anywhere, but by Mother's Grace, I was in the Ashram that night. I slept deeply and woke feeling very rested. I was on my way to breakfast in the Ashram dining room and I had just passed the main Ashram building when someone stopped me and told me that Mother left her body the night before. He said that Her body was downstairs in the meditation room. I didn't believe it. The words had no meaning because I never thought Mother would leave. But as I always wanted to see Mother I decided to go into the meditation room to see what was there.

I turned into the Ashram main gate. The Samadhi area was quiet and peaceful. Everything looked the same as usual. I went quickly to the meditation room. Mother was there, on Her bed... Her body had been placed in a sitting position and Her head was bent down in a manner that made me think of total surrender. The only way I can describe how She looked is to say that She looked completely empty, as if there was nothing left inside Her physical body. I tried to feel something in Her, but I could not feel anything in Her body at all. There was no one in the room only Mother and I.

In Mother's periodic reports in Her Agenda on the work of the transformation of Her physical cells, She speaks about different things She learned on the subject of taking the conscious cells out when the body dies. She never said that She would do any


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particular thing, but, standing there with Her, I was sure that when She left She had taken everything out of Her body.

There was a feeling of fullness in the meditation room and I was aware of Mother's light. The room was very quiet and at the same time it was vibrating with strong energy which continued to increase. I could hear it humming. Miraculously nobody came into the meditation room for what seemed to be an endless amount of time. I stood and looked at Mother, feeling the energy increase. I heard two words: "Eternal Contact". I repeated them to myself, over and over, Eternal Contact, Eternal Contact. Finally, I quickly went for breakfast and returned again to stand as before. I expected to see a lot of people there but the room was still empty. There was only Mother and I. The room was vibrating strongly. The humming was very loud. When people started coming, I went quietly home. I never thought of staying to see Her body be placed in the Samadhi. Mother was no longer in Her body, in Her room, but else nothing changed for me. Mother was still my best and closest friend. I continued working in the kitchen always thinking of Her and talking to Her and receiving Her guidance and help. One day, I found white paper lamp-shades to cover the naked light bulbs hanging in the Worker's Camp dining room. After that I began to feel that there was someone or something up inside the roof. This feeling persisted for weeks. I finally decided it was an angel.

I went to see Madhav Pandit and asked him what it could be. He told me, "When Mother gives someone a work to do She puts an emanation there. If the work is successful, it comes into manifestation. It is the emanation that Mother put for the work She gave you that you sense." I had completed the work that Mother had given me three years before and had "fixed" the kitchen at the Matrimandir.

Soon after that, I left Auroville and went to the Ashram. It was a sudden decision and I left the next day. In fact, it was Mother's Grace. The day after I left marked the first outbreak of the violence which opened a long period of violence and hostility in Auroville.


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It involved almost everyone I knew, but I was virtually untouched. I only heard about it after I returned to Auroville years after all the trouble was over.

Thirty seven years after I first came to Mother, I was sitting in deep meditation and I had the memory of a conversation with Mother when I was still too young to walk or talk. I remembered being unhappy with my life then, and Mother came to see me. She promised me that I had taken birth because of Her and Her work, and She also promised me that I would receive what I came for. It was a very profound confirmation of my relationship with Her and with Sri Aurobindo. Soon after I first came to Mother I realized that life had no meaning for me outside of Mother and Sri Aurobindo and their work. The more I have been able to completely surrender, the more I realize who I am and the more I am with them and working for them and with them, they are so close and so caring all the time. There can be nothing else more wonderful in this life.

As time goes by I realized more and more the living truth of everything They said and everything They did. It is clear to me that They are still here, still working for humanity and the earth. I believe they are with everyone who is sincere about wanting to grow and progress. I see the results all around me and I believe that everything that They said would happen will come to pass. (a talk on 2.11.2011)

(Loretta had her first darshan of the Mother in 1972. Later, leaving Auroville and the Ashram, she went to law school and became a lawyer with Mother and Sri Aurobindo's guidance and help as training for her Auroville work. Loretta lives full time in Auroville where she has researched and presented 16 large photograph exhibitions, published four book compilations and gives lectures all on Mother and Sri Aurobindo and their work. She has made a two hour documentary video on Mother s life and work called, "The Teachings Of Flowers ".)

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Doubly blessed by the Mother (Dr. Susil Kumar Pani)

- Dr. Susil Kumar Pani

Actually for the first time I am going to share something absolutely personal. Many of the things are very interesting ways of the Mother's work. Trying to recollect something when I was 8 or 9 years old is a very difficult thing but certain things have remained crystal clear even today. I vaguely remember it was probably the year 1972. My birthday falls on 1st August and I have got a brother whose birthday falls on 7th August. I have a sister whose birthday also falls on 7th August. We are 10 brothers and sisters - big family. So in August, 3 out of 10 of us had our birthdays. I used to say we, with our parents, can form a cricket, football or hockey team and play. Certain aspects I was not aware till actually my father demised. He never told certain things. He divulged to certain persons who are close to me of the extreme grace of the Mother on me. As for my experience ... I remember I was very upset because we were starting after my birthday on 1st August to Pondicherry. And Mother had given permission for my sister and brother for Darshan on 7th and we had to wait for 15th August also. I was not aware whether I was given permission or anything. We were starting late, that's all I remember.

The only thing I could vividly recollect is reaching the Mother and not knowing what to do and later on I knew that Champaklal who was next to Mother put my head on Mother's lap and then Mother puts Her hand on my head. And then reluctantly I looked at Her eyes and of course that is a blessing light. It is very difficult to describe. How long it lasted and how we came back and rest of the things I don't recollect, frankly speaking. I vaguely remember once or twice the balcony darshan, along with the crowd.


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But the presence of the Mother in certain incidences in my life is very interesting in the sense that as I progress, I have learnt that Mother's presence is always there. Surendar writes that you always behave as if Mother is looking at you. I will describe just one or two incidences.

I was working in Madurai as medical officer and had come with a new team to do eye camp to Seerkazhi which is about 60 to 70 kms from Pondicherry. So whenever I come all this far, I used to stay back. Because my brother was here 1 used to stay back, spend the Sunday evening, take a day's leave and then go back. It was in the year 1992. I was the medical officer so I was leading the team and there was a very young doctor who was doing philosophy programme in Sri Aurobindo Society and those days we had 'Standard 20' vans. 16 to 17 people were in that camp. We came and did the camp after an 8 hour drive from Madurai. Because there were young doctors who had come to the camp for the first time I decided to return back with the team instead of staying back. We started on Sunday evening, post lunch around 3 o' clock. The driver was also very young and dynamic and he was driving fast. It was nearly getting evening.

Between Pattukottai and Pudukottai there are two places with lots of trees on both sides of the road. It was a state highway and so not so wide like the national highway. Our small vehicle was going at about 70 Kmph and there was a man coming by cycle in the opposite direction. He was on the left - probably he was drunk but was coming to the centre of the road. If he would go to the left it seemed the cyclist would also be coming to the same side. The driver wanted to avoid an accident and save his life. As the driver went on the right, suddenly in the last moment, the fellow again came back to his left side. So in a split second I could visualise the vehicle crossing to the right side and both the right wheels going off the road. The driver swung it to bring it back and I knew something was going to go wrong. All that I remember is that I loudly called 'Ma' and that was all. The van circled in the air 360 degrees back. We crossed to the other side of the road, between


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Trying to know the way of the Mother's work is extremely difficult from the level of our mind. What was interesting for me to learn was that it was by Mother's grace that happened. Even if one wishes to do certain things one cannot do unless it is the Mother's wish. I didn't understand the meaning of Surrender at that time. Looking back I understand that he meant it was time for him to go. So these are just a few incidences to remember the Mother's way of work. My father used to write to the Mother for every work he had to undertake. Mother used to personally write Her blessings and send. He also used to send many prayers to the Mother which She used to sign and send back. Incidentally my father has composed a song on the Mother. This is actually to understand the glory of the Divine. So those are different aspects. (talk on 2.11.2011)

Hai prabhu poorana natha hamaa rai

Knoona knoona goona kahai thumhara

Hai prabhu.....Dayaa teri Hari aparam paar

Tuu hee prabhu hai dayaa bhandara

Hai prabu.....

Oh lord, the lord of my whole being

Who all can describe your attributes?

Oh lord..... Oh Hari (Vishnu/Krishna) your grace is limitless

You are the source of all compassion and grace

Oh lord.....

(Bom into a family of traditional & cultural prominance and academic exhuberant - Dr. Susil Kumar Pani is a specialist, practicing eye surgeon at 'Raghu eye clinic' (in Puducherry) named after his father Dr. Raghunath Pani. A creative artist, author, photographer (connected with Ashram and Auroville).

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"Today is a day of great Grace for you"

- Varadharajan

I have been staying in and working for Auroville from 1969 onwards and participated in some of the Aspiration talks with the Mother. Coming nearer and nearer to Her, I like to recapitulate my Pranam to the Mother in March, 1973.

I had asked for the time, had gone to the terrace near the Mother's Room and was waiting to go to Her. Three or four persons were there along with me. Champaklalji told us that Mother will not be able to see us that day. Somehow he went into the Mother's Room, came back and said that She may allow us, but he was not sure. It may take some time to know the answer. He said that we can go and attend to our work and if somebody wants to stay, he may do so. After some time all except me went away. I decided that I will wait till something definitive is known. After about 10 or 1 5 minutes, Champaklalji came and told me that I can go inside and do Pranam.

When I went inside, Mother was on Her couch, in deep trance. The silence was vibrant. I stood near Her for a few minutes silently, did Pranam without touching Her. Mother, myself and Champaklalji at the door were the only three people. As I came out, Champaklalji told me "Today is a day of great Grace for you." Indeed it is so, I felt that Mother had come out of Her trance to indicate to Champaklalji that I can be allowed and it was extreme kindness on the part of Champaklalji to have facilitated this. It was Her last physical act towards me in Her overflowing Love and there are no adequate words to express my gratitude to the Supramental Avatar when She came in Her physical body to bless me and all of us. Something in me feels that what I received at that


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time is going to all others who are in the same state of consciousness.

(Varadharajan is a resident of Auroville since 1969. In the early years of Auroville he was the contact person for the local people. Now he is a faculty member of SAIIER, Auroville, conducting Auroville Outreach Educational Programme.)

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Meeting with the Mother:

A remembrance from my childhood

Dr. Beena R. Nayak

All can be done... .and the flame.

The above lines of Canto One Book One - The Symbol Dawn from Sri Aurobindo's epic poem 'Savitri', expresses the whole and the sum total of the experience of meeting with the Mother at the Sri Aurobindo Ashram Pondicherry, signaling the end of a dark night into a beautiful dawn, of my spirit.

I met Her at the end of my fourth standard in the summer vacation in 1970. My maternal grandfather, Bapa, who had become Her follower in the 1940s took me on a flying visit to Her for the April 24 Darshan. I was a student at the local convent and I was my Bapa's pet who had recently arrived from Zambia. He had Sri Aurobindo's darshan in the 1940s and since he was at India he was keen to attend a darshan each year. His maternal cousin, Shri Ambelal Mehta, Bhai, had joined the Ashram in the early 1900s. Their family traditionally were devotees of the saints of the Avdhoot tradition under the auspicious deity, Dattatreya.

I had already been introduced to the Mother's signed picture to which my Bapa used to offer his pranaam each morning before starting his day. She, in the black and white photo, looked like a white lotus to me, which I later learnt was indeed Her form in flowers, Aditi. I of course was equally attracted to the offer to go to Pondicherry because it would be my first flight in India, since I could remember. After reaching Madras, now Chennai, and speeding along the old Madras Road, I remember looking at the


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coastal beaches and falling into a deep sleep from which I only woke up on reaching the Ashram dwelling on Chetty street which Bhai shared with two young men, Deepak and Hrishi. I felt all of them as warm affection and they first suggested we visit the Samadhi before the doors would close before the night meditation.

I was still drowsy as we entered a beautiful perfumed flower garden with dim lights where people were sitting around mostly in white shirts and khakhi shorts. My senses but suddenly came fully awake as I entered a dreamlike moment as we were standing near the Samadhi of Sri Aurobindo, a white marble slab with heavenly incense filling all my senses and with the smoke fringes of the incense my eyes lifted to a room with wooden shutters where I saw a lady in white, mostly Her great eyes looking upon me. I came fully awake. I was suddenly Her child and all the distance had disappeared. I felt so awake, alive and at home. The wonderful in my life had begun. From then on the Smile only widened as my awareness of that Wonder grew in the light of my life.

On the next day we were part of the small crowd, looking up at the balcony where the Mother normally appeared. People were not sure if She would be there. Suddenly a light rain began, but the crowd stood hopeful, looking up and slowly She appeared. I do not remember how She appeared but can only remember the feeling of gratitude, joy and love that swept upon the crowd at the moment. I did not think of anything and only felt a part of the One.

Since we had arrived Bapa was putting in small notes of request to the Mother for a personal audience, but until the morning of 25th we had no reply from Her. Then, after a nice breakfast at Park S'Bonne on the sea, we sat at the Samadhi and my Bapa said "still no answer. But maybe She will listen if you ask Her?" So in my ugly handwriting I simply wrote to Her, "Mother, will you please call us to see You?" A group of people were already in an inner courtyard who had received the permission for Her audience.

We were not one of them, I could really feel the same disappointment as my Bapa and Bhai, that we would not get to


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meet with Her. Then Bapa suddenly saw one of the inmates calling him and he rushed me and my father inside. So really we were at the end of a slow que of people who went forward with a prayer almost palpable mingling with the jasmine and rose scent of flowers arranged beautifully everywhere in symbolic patterns and the heavenly incense once again. I was very nervous and feeling shy as I followed my Bapa and father upstairs to the room above the Samadhi.

Space, time as a continuum of my consciousness was concentrated on one point - what must I do when I meet Her, how must I bow to Her. Because of a father who was always inviting sadhus to our home and taking me to see renowned spiritual teachers of the time, I was not new to the concept of Darshan, pranaam and ashirvaad. But somehow because of all the wonderful experiences since our arrival and listening to the loving records from the memories of Bhai and his two roommates, I felt like I really belonged in that space, I was in my space and I was about to meet someone who was mine or someone who was not a stranger.

As we entered into a room filled with beautiful things in all corners we first bowed to the photo of Sri Aurobindo but that was really not the point. I felt as if I was now being carried along on a great wave of love and compassion forward and finally in a space near the balcony I saw people bowing to someone in a chair, receiving something from the great man standing near Her in a flowing white beard, later I came to know as 'Her lion, Champaklalji'. Then my Bapa's turn came, then my Pap's and then it was my turn! I can still remember how it felt inside but even now cannot find the right words to describe that whole experience. I first knelt in front of Her and then bowed with all the feeling in me and overwhelmed as I was by Her brilliant Smile, found myself totally embraced with my face on Her lap. I do not remember how long was that moment! How to measure that Time encapsulating the golden memories of all lifetimes into that one true moment, when all the prayers and yearnings were answered in one signal moment of Her touch! But then I was standing up


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smiling with my hands folded and then Champaklalji gave me lots of flowers, cards and sweets and took me through to the door. Later as we climbed down he was sent again with some more things for me and he asked if we had visited the new township of Auroville. And if we hadn't we should. As we had hired a taxi to Bangalore the next day, we agreed that it was a great idea to take a ride down to the new township of Auroville. As we sat for a brief moment at the Samadhi I realized in my overflowing heart that I had met my true Mother. In that same new identity I overflowed on that same big wave of love and joy into Auroville, where we visited the beginnings of Matrimandir, the school at Promesse, the school and the community of Aspiration and my first ride through the red sands under the cashew topes of Auroville. But somehow all that was significant was the Blessings that made me feel like I had now Everything! All that was sad was now joyous, all that was lonely in me was now filled with Her majestic Presence. I was someone now. I was the Mother's child now and forever. I was Home.

(This second edition is corrected for some factual errors in the first edition in Darshan published in 2006.)

(Dr. Beena R. Nayak is a medical practitioner with an MBA, residing in Gujarat, India. She has been connected with the city of Auroville since 1993 in the capacity of a physician. She had the great fortune to have the Mother's Darshan in 1970 with her grandpa, Balvantrai Durlabhrai Desai well-known in the Ashram as Kalubhai a devotee of Sri Aurobindo since the 1920s.)

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The united Two began a greater age.


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CHAPTER - 2

"India will not be overrun, because the

Supermind has descended"

Extract from the book 'A Divine Life in a Divine Body'

by Navajata Bhaiji

I first heard of the Mother and Sri Aurobindo in 1929 when I was only seven years old. Even then something in me, in a childlike manner, spontaneously accepted Them as my masters. Physically, Sri Aurobindo was not accessible to us except on Darshan days or through correspondence, so it was usually to the Mother that we referred problems and experiences - spiritual and material - of ourselves and of others. Her guidance invariably brought a ray of Her Divine Consciousness in our everyday lives.

Let me share with you a few - very few - of these reminiscences as far as I can recollect them, spread as they are over a wide span of forty-four years. In this brief talk I will try to cover some aspects of Her multifaceted personality. It is enjoined on us not to narrate our spiritual experiences, so I shall confine myself to some of those events which can be spoken of and which occupy a permanent place in my heart.

Long before I joined the Ashram, I used to visit here very frequently and seek Her guidance on a wide range of apparently difficult matters. For example, one day I asked Her, "Mother, is everything predetermined? What freedom has man and to what extent? In my own life I do not see any freedom. It is as though some forces beyond us always govern our lives and yet it is not possible to believe that life is just mechanical." Quietly and slowly came the reply, "One has several destinies. The plane of


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consciousness in which you dwell determines the destiny which becomes applicable to you. When you unite with the Divine Consciousness you are free. Prayers also change destinies. It is like a fruit falling from a tree to the ground; if you put a hand in the way, you can stop its fall. " I was satisfied but returned to this topic after some days and asked further, "Is the putting out of the hand itself predetermined?" She explained, "It depends upon the plane of consciousness from which you see it. " Again, on another occasion She remarked "I tell you things can change. "

Her answers to our questions despite the incomplete information placed before Her were invariably correct. One day I was reading a letter while waiting for Her. She came and I prayed, "Mother, a relative of mine is ill. The doctors are unable to diagnose what is wrong." She remarked, "It is the medicine ", and walked away. The family sent for another doctor. He found that, indeed, it was the medicine that was harming the patient. The medication was changed and the patient recovered completely. This took place in Calcutta. She would sometimes see the photographs of persons who were to be given responsible positions for work. At other times devotees sent photographs of couples proposed for marriage to enquire whether a particular match had Her approval and Her blessings. So I queried, "Mother, how do you judge a person by his photograph?" She replied, "There is no written rule about it. When I hold a person's photograph or his hand, the past, present and future of the person come to me. "

I worried that I was taking too much of Her time by asking such questions. So I prayed to Her, "How do you always give the right answer? If I had this capacity I would not bother you with so many questions," and for the first time She taught me how to quieten the mind and seek guidance from deep within.

Her way of working was unique. Once, some work of the Ashram had to be attended to in Bombay. The Mother instructed me to tell a friend of mine to look after it. This friend was in Calcutta, while I was actually going to Delhi and had no plan to


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meet him. In those days the Delhi plane used to stop at Hyderabad. When I landed there, I learnt that my friend would also be landing at Hyderabad ten minutes later, though his plane had been scheduled to arrive much before ours. I was surprised, if his plane had been on schedule, he would have gone into town and I would have missed meeting him at the airport; if he had arrived later, my plane would already have left for Delhi. It was amazing how the Mother had arranged the meeting! We met and I conveyed to him the Mother's instructions. He already had plans to go to Bombay, so everything just fitted in. Experiences of this type were very common in our working with the Mother.

When the Auroville project was approved by Her, we had neither money nor manpower. In answer to questions like who was directing Auroville, who was financing it, She wrote: "The Supreme Divine "! One day in answer to a question on Auroville, She took a paper, drew a circular design and marked a spot on it. Everything was finished in two or three minutes. The architects however, designed the town on the pattern of a square. After one year and much research, they found that the circular design was more satisfactory. They were intrigued that the Mother should have given in two minutes this design to which they arrived at after so many trials and errors. As a result they decided to learn to get inspiration from a deeper plane. Once when our chief architect took the design of a model village to the Mother, She remarked, "He got it exactly as I saw it. "

At one time, many years back, in my sadhana I was not sure whether I should meditate on the Sakara, the form of the Divine, or on the Nirakara the formless. So, as usual, I turned to Her for guidance. I asked Her, "Mother, on what should I meditate - your physical body or the Nirakara, the formless Divine?" She answered, " What is the difference? If you think this body is the Mother, you are limiting my force to twenty-five percent. When people ask me questions, they get conveyed to the Supreme Consciousness and the answers come from there."


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On another occasion I pleaded with Her, "Mother, please tell me my defects so that I may improve myself." "No, no, my child" came the Motherly reply, "I shall show you your qualities so that you may improve yourself. " I wish all parents and teachers would apply this key to progress.

She sometimes assigned me duties which entailed travelling outside Pondicherry. So I enquired if I should return during the Darshan days. She replied, "It is better to come. But if you cannot, you have only to concentrate and you will see me there. "

She knew all that was necessary to know about us. At an international photography competition, the judges requested the Mother to select the photographs for the first three prizes. They had already made a preliminary selection and the selected photographs were arranged in a room. The Mother was giving us Her blessings before going to this room. I was keen to be present, but was too shy to ask Her. She quietly came to me and without my having asked, whispered, "You can come." Later I enquired, "Mother, how did you know?" and She replied, "I always know. But I keep quiet when it suits me. "

Just before the Chinese attack, an Indian yogi conveyed to the Mother his apprehension that China would attack and overrun India. The Mother asked me to tell him, "India will not be overrun, because the Supermind has descended. "

A few days before She retired, I told Her that it had come to me in meditation that we should have a world magazine in all languages. She nodded, and Champaklal gave Her a paper and She wrote down, the Next Future, and then asked for another paper and wrote in French, Le Prochain Avenir.

And now when She has left Her physical body, I feel that, as in a drama, She has only gone behind the curtain, so that the next scene, the next future may follow. What this next future is going to be depends on Her Grace.

The Supreme Mother personified Herself in the physical body as the Mother of Pondicherry and manifested the Divine Perfection possible on earth.


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Blessed is the earth that Her Feet have touched.

Courtesy: Sri Aurobindo Society, Puducherry

(Navajata Bhaiji (1922 to 1980) : With the Mother as the President, he started Sri Aurobindo Society. He was its General Secretary and Treasurer till 1973 and after the Mother s passing, became Chairman. As a man of vision and action he was instrumental in launching many projects for Ashram, Society and Auroville)

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A mighty guidance leads us through all...

Andre Morisset, from Sri Aurobindo Circle Magazine

My earliest remembrances date back to the very beginning of this century and lack clearness. They centre round two spots. One is Beaugency, a little town on the river Loire where I lived with two aunts my father's sisters, my grandfather and my nurse. The other is 15 rue Lemercier in Paris where my mother and father had a flat and their painters' studio which I considered the most wonderful place of the world.

Beaugency is still vivid in my mind for the garden which was at the back of the house and separated from it by a small courtyard. I also have a recollection of my foster sister: Genevieve; but what struck me most were the visits which mother and father paid to us in their motor car. It was a Richard Brazier and had not to bear a number plate because it could not do more than thirty kilometers per hour. I cannot remember if I took this fact as a big advantage or, on the contrary, the sign of an irretrievable inferiority. My parents used to carry with them a couple of bicycles "just in case." As a matter of fact, on the first hundred and fifty kilometers trip to Beaugency, the steering gear broke after fifty kilometers, at Etampes, and the car stopped inside a bakery. They stayed there overnight, used the cycles to visit the place and left the next day, the car having been repaired by the local blacksmith.

In Paris, my parents leased a flat on the first storey of the house, a fairly large garden at the back of it and a big studio in the garden. The studio had a glass roof high enough for a foot-bridge to link the flat and the studio at first storey level. An inside staircase climbed from the studio ground level to the foot bridge. It was therefore possible to reach the studio from the outside either through


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the hall of the house and the garden, or by climbing to the first floor of the house and getting in the flat, crossing a small drawing room and catching the foot-bridge. It was in this drawing room that Mother introduced me to Madame Fraya who was to become a very renowned seer. She appeared to me a very pretty lady with a very big hat and a pleasant way of talking.

While Mother was still living at 15 rue Lemercier, I was brought to Lausanne, in Switzerland, to meet my great-grandmother : Mirra Ismalun. My grandmother, Mathilde Alfassa, was to introduce me to her and I was rather impressed by her "service" given to Mirra Ismalun at Grancy Villas, a good residence ,in Lausanne. I was duly introduced to my great-grandmother who then addressed me more or less like this: "Bonjour, mon petit Andre, tu me trouves bien vieille, n'est-ce pas?" ("Good morning, my little Andre, you find me very old, do you not?"), to which I replied with all truth in my voice: "Oh! Oui!" ("Oh! Yes!") The interview did not go much further.

Later, my father and mother divorced, and mother married Paul Richard. They came to live at rue du Val de Grace and I used to go and have lunch with them every Sunday. After lunch, especially when the weather was bad, we went to the studio, Paul Richard stretched on a couch, lit his pipe, and they started working. That is, my mother wrote in her own handwriting what he dictated. I could not help but notice that mother was rectifying most of Paul's dictation. This small house, at the back of a garden, or more precisely of a fairly large courtyard, with a few trees, stretching in front of a big apartment house, was strikingly cozy and very comfortable.

Then the Richards went to Pondicherry and came back in 1915, Paul Richard having been called as a reservist at Lunel, in the South of France. When he was freed from military service, they settled nearby, at Marsillargues, where I came to stay during the school holidays in July and August. There I heard of Sri Aurobindo for the first time and I learned to play chess with Paul Richard.


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The First World War was going on; in the spring of 1916 the Richards went to Japan and I joined the army in October. From then on I always felt protected and the continuous play of "luck" was amazing. Letters from my mother came regularly from Japan but the military rule forced me to destroy them soon after they were received. Otherwise they would now be a priceless collection. I shall only mention two cases of this amazing "luck" which are probably important as regards their consequences but are only two cases out of many.

First, I caught the flu in May 1918 and was treated, as several others, with a heavy dose of aspirin, and we all fully recovered after forty-eight hours of rather high fever. None of us caught later the Spanish Flu for which aspirin was not any more a cure. It seemed that we had been more or less vaccinated by the first attack of what was not yet called the Spanish Flu.

The second case is more directly linked with the War. During the night of the 15th July 1918 the battery of 6" howitzer in which I was serving was submitted to a very heavy gunfire. The way from the Command post to the battery was limited to a narrow footpath by rolls of barbed wire. While I was walking there I was caught in one of the rolls which had been thrown on me by the explosion of a shell. As I was trying to extricate myself from the mess, a further roll, thrown by another shell, was dropped on me, then some more, during about two hours. Three months later, when we were progressing some two hundred and fifty kilometers on the North-West of our 15th of July site, we found a German battery which had obviously been left in a hurry. In a batch of maps I found one of La Main de Massiges - where we were in July -and the location of our battery shown as a target, but with a mistake, the four guns being shown at both ends of the footpath so that the very place where I had been pinned to the ground was shown as the actual target.

Then there was a period of at once high relaxation and heavy intellectual work. I was admitted to the Ecole Polytechnique and


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stayed there from December 1919 to August 1921 and started my industrial career immediately after.

In the meantime, my mother went back to Pondicherry and resumed Her real work with Sri Aurobindo. She kept me regularly aware of the development of the Ashram and of their Sadhana. I was thus more and more interested until the Second World War broke out and the collapse of France cut all relations between the Mother and me ... and this lasted until the liberation of Paris.

Then the opportunity arose for me, in 1949, to make a round trip to India which the Mother monitored through Bombay, Delhi, Agra, Calcutta and Madras, eventually greeting me at the room 3E1 at Golconde.

After this, my recollections are more or less one with the life of the Ashram.

Courtesy: Sri Aurobindo Circle Magazine, Issue No. 34, Dt. 14.11.1977

(Andre Morisset (1898 - 1982) was the Mother's only son. He visited the Ashram first in 1949 and was one of the members of the Comite Administratif d'Auroville (Committee for Administration of Auroville) approved by the Mother in 1970.)

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An electrifying presence (Dr. Karan Singh)

Extract from the book 'Meetings with Remarkable Women'

Dr. Karan Singh

Along with my mother and wife, I visited Pondicherry for the first time in 1956, six years after Sri Aurobindo passed away. We had the privilege of a fairly long meeting with the Mother, who we were later told, specially readjusted Her programme to meet us. At the very first meeting I came under the spell of Her personality. The gravitas of Her persona was undeniable. It was soothing and yet electrifying. Her face lit up in a soft smile but Her eyes were penetrating. I met Her on two other occasions, once along with Nolini Kanta Gupta and once with Udar Pinto. On the last occasion She looked at me for a long time and then said a prolonged 'yes'. Sri Aurobindo himself was a most remarkable figure, and His evolutionary philosophy is still being studied around the world. His birthday is on 15 August and in His final message He said: "August 15 is the birthday of free India. It marks for her the end of an old era, the beginning of a new age. But we can also make it by our life and acts as a free nation an important date in a new age opening for the whole world, for the political, social, cultural and spiritual future of humanity."

As I see it, the Mother acted not only as a spiritual collaborator but also as a bashyakar or interpreter of Sri Aurobindo's writings, explaining and clarifying them to the Ashramites and the world. In fact, Her luminous comments are of tremendous help in understanding the complex and profound philosophy of Sri Aurobindo. This was clearly one of the great spiritual partnerships


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of all time. The only parallel I can think of is St. Francis and St Clara of Assisi.

Courtesy: Palimpsest Publishing House, New Delhi - 17 Year 2014

(A versatile, eminent and remarkable personality, Dr. Karan Singh has been the Chairman of Auroville Foundation from 1991 to 96 and also presently, since 2004. He is a member of the Rajya Sabha.)

* * *

WHO

In the blue of the sky, in the green of the forest,

Whose is the hand that has painted the glow?

When the winds were asleep in the womb of the ether,

Who was it roused them and bade them to blow?....

In the strength of a man, in the beauty of woman,

In the laugh of a boy, in the blush of a girl;

The hand that sent Jupiter spinning through heaven,

Spends all its cunning to fashion a curl....

We have love for a boy who is dark and resplendent,

A woman is lord of us, naked and fierce.

We have seen Him a-muse on the snow of the mountains,

We have watched Him at work in the heart of the spheres...

All music is only the sound of His laughter,

All beauty the smile of His passionate bliss;

Our lives are His heart-beats, our rapture the bridal

Of Radha and Krishna, our love is their kiss....

In the sweep of the worlds, in the surge of the ages,

Ineffable, mighty, majestic and pure,

Beyond the last pinnacle seized by the thinker

He is throned in His seats that for ever endure....

It is He in the sun who is ageless and deathless,

And into the midnight His shadow is thrown;

When darkness was blind and engulfed within darkness,

He was seated within it immense and alone.

Sri Aurobindo - Collected Poems : pg 40 - 41


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Imagine somebody greater than the universe (Prof. Kireet Joshi)

Transcript of an interview with Prof. Kireet Joshi

Interviewer: Kireet Bhai, this interview is really to ask you to speak about the Mother. First because you were there at that time and we were not there and we feel like asking you what was it like to be there at that special time in that special place and to be there in this atmosphere that surrounded the Mother.

Prof. Kireet Joshi: I used to go to the Mother every Sunday from the 18th May 1969 up to 30th of March 1973. The question that you are asking is as to how I used to feel. It is a very difficult question because it is inexpressible, ineffable. How to express the ineffable? You felt completely comforted and surprisingly one never felt that you are in the presence of some very very great Presence. It was as if in the lap of your mother - so comfortable, so easy and so happy. There was all the time available; in fact She never seemed to be in a hurry. I used to ask many questions to the Mother about the Centre of Education, about Sri Aurobindo's action and Auroville and every time Her answer was immediate. There was no gap between question and answer, as it were. You never felt that She has now to think over it. The answer was almost ready. It was ready and coming forth as if the answer was before my question. Well, there was absolute concentration of the Mother. Such concentration I have never seen anywhere. When I spoke a word, it was completely heard by Her. Of course some people used to say that Mother doesn't hear but I contradict fully because up to 30th of March, 1973 whatever I spoke to Her She heard fully well. She corrected things which I spoke and I had complete assurance that She heard, She replied, precisely to the question that I asked and there was no mistake about it at all and there was


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no hesitation in answering any question at all. Well, I can only say that I was in the lap of the Mother and I am congratulating my left arm because She used to caress my left arm several times during my visit to Her. It was full of Love, and the most joyous time of my life - in fact the most privileged, golden time.

Let me tell you some of the internal experiences that I had. I met the Mother for the first time in 1952. When I went to Her, I was introduced to Her as a pupil of my teacher who had taken me to Her. Then for seven days I stayed in Golconde and I used to go every day to tennis ground when Mother used to play tennis. I always used to feel that when She used to throw the ball, as if She was playing with the universe. That was the feeling in my heart. That She was playing with the universe. She was throwing the ball. Every ball was, as it were, the universe and She was beating the universe, as it were, with Her racquet. On the last day, 7th day, when I was leaving - I had gone to Her, at the playground in the room where Sri Aurobindo's portrait is still there. She gave me a bunch of flowers of Purity, jasmine flowers. So many, both my palms were full and I remember that when I went to the train I felt the same Mother standing before me and for seven days thereafter I had the same experience - as if Mother was everywhere-wherever I looked around I felt Mother was there. That was my first experience of the Mother. Then later I had come one day to have an interview with the Mother - I prayed to Her. She said, " I am so busy. For two months I am completely booked." I could not meet Her personally but I had written a letter to Her and She replied to me, not in words but in actions. All my problems which I had put before Her, they came to be resolved one after the other. In 1955, I had come here. She had remarked to somebody, "That boy is a nice boy. " And then 1956 when I came, to remain here permanently - next day Her secretary told me, "I have never seen Mother so happy as when She said, 'Oh, he is so nice, so nice'. " I feel ashamed to tell you this because it is concerning me but I was very very happy. I am very encouraged by the Mother. Even


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today I feel - encouraged - when I feel that I am now feeling, I am going away, - I still feel encouraged by the words She had spoken at that time. First work She gave me was in the press, then in the library and the library time was a very good time for me. I had used to spend a lot of time in my meditation and one day in the evening I had an experience of my witness Self. I cannot say that was me but there was a Self which was watching and a prayer was rising from my heart and I said, "Mother, I want to teach." I myself did not know this but I was witnessing my prayer: "Mother, I want to teach." I hadn't spoken to anybody about it, but the very next day Pavitra came in search of Kireet Joshi. He had never known me but he found me in the library and he told me, "Mother wants you to be the Registrar of the Centre of Education but she wants to know whether you would like to be." So I said, "Whatever Mother wants me to be, I shall be." This is the answer I gave and he went away but next day he came again and said, "Mother is not satisfied with your answer. You would certainly like to do whatever Mother says but what do You want? Would you like to be a Registrar?" So I said, "Yes, yes, I will." And that was the time, it was in November 1958, I think. December 16th the school was opening and within one month we were changing the entire system of education. I did that work very happily with the help of my friend Prof. Joshi, even now he is there in the laboratory, one of my greatest friends. With his help I could do the work within one month's time to open the school with a new system of education which I will not discuss now. That was the beginning of my work, as it were, with the Mother because although I never went to Mother personally but in about two years later Mother said to Pavitra da, "Now you are my post office between me and Kireet. " I used to refer many questions about the Centre of Education, about the development of the school and so on.

In 1969 Pavitra da left his body and thereafter on the 17th May evening - I was standing at the Samadhi - Champaklal came to me. It was Saturday evening. He said, "Grace, Grace, Grace of


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the Mother." So I turned to him and he said, "Mother has said every Sunday morning She will see you first. So 8 o' clock in the morning be present, at the Mother's room." When I went to the Mother the first time She was so gentle. Oh my god! She said, "Would you like to sit on a stool? " She offered me to sit on the stool. I said, "No, no, no. I will sit on the floor." And then She said, "Is there sufficient light? " She told Vasudha ben, "Bring the light here. "Lumiere", She said. Then I said, "I don't need the light, I can read quite well." I must tell you that I used to write down everything that I had to ask the Mother on every Saturday night. So that I don't have to waste my time in order to find the right words and so on. So I used to read out to Her all my questions and She used to answer every question separately, one by one, and very quickly. Well, this went on until the month of September, 1972.

In the meantime many things developed in our Centre of Education. You know the first thing that I had to do was to write a letter to the Prime Minister of India, when I joined the school. What had happened I do not know but I was asked by Pavitra da to write a letter to Prime Minister describing our Centre of Education and asking for support. So I wrote that letter which was read by the Mother. Mother liked that letter so much that She printed my description of the Centre of Education in the Bulletin. That means within one month I had mastered, as it were, the entire philosophy of education that Sri Aurobindo ... Of course I was reading Sri Aurobindo's books much earlier so it was not a big effort on my part.

Well, there were three events which were very important during the time ... before ... in the time of Pavitra da ... when we were working ... Actually I used to meet Pavitra da every day twice. Once in the morning and once in the afternoon. Every day, whatever questions came, he used to take from me and next day there were replies from the Mother. Again in the afternoon I had many


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questions and again (I) used to refer to the Mother. By next morning I had the answers to the questions.

Interviewer: It must have been that sometimes you had questions and the answer.... How could you explain... I mean the answer must have been from the Divine Mother and also from the physical Mother. No, I mean....

Prof. Kireet Joshi: Well, I had never felt that the Mother was the physical Mother. It was always the Divine Mother.

Interviewer: But you see it wasn't so like my Mother.

Prof. Kireet Joshi: Yes, I was in the lap of the Mother. I used to feel as if... so comforted, so joyous ... There was no restriction of any kind at all.

Interviewer: No, but sometimes She must have given answer that maybe you did not understand and then later on ....

Prof. Kireet Joshi: No, it did not happen like that. I think I understood what She said because She said so clearly and so beautifully it went straight into my heart.

Interviewer: But was there, sometimes, surprising answers?

Interviewer: Or decisions or ....

Prof. Kireet Joshi: Yes, for example there was X.. who was a disciple of the Mother and she had written one letter saying that she was not able to find the money because she has to take the permission of her board. She was a very favourite woman and I had a great respect for her but Mother, when I told her that she had to take permission of her board, She said something. She said, "It is humbug. " Something like that. "All the members of the board are her own yes men. So where is the question of taking the permission of the board." But this is quite a surprising answer from the Mother and She spoke as if She was tearing off this whole idea that she could not send the money. In fact I must tell you that, with the Mother, She was happiest whenever anything was offered to Her. This experience of mine that our whole being should offer to Her entirely, more and more and more and more. She was very happy with that.


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Interviewer: Some people I talked to . . . they say . . . like X . . . for instance, he said that when Mother looked at you She recognised

you, She knew exactly who you were.

Kireet Joshi: Yes of course, it was understood. Actually I was never surprised about it at all. I knew that She knew me more than anything else in the whole world (laughs). Fully, She knew me very well (laughs). She knew my weaknesses... whatever I was...

I'd narrate to you three experiences of mine when Pavtira da was still there but I had an opportunity of going to the Mother when the first Commission of Education came to meet the Mother. And I was present at that time. She said to one of the members of the committee, "Were the children of my school timid - I mean answering your questions? " The lady in charge said, "No, on the contrary so bright and so forthcoming that the poems which I had forgotten your children remembered them so well - from Keats, Wordsworth and Shelley. They are extremely good students." And Mother was very happy. She said, "Yes, my children here you know." She said, "When you see the children developing their muscles, gives you such a delight. " I feel very happy to hear these words. That to see the children developing their muscles and to see the Mother delighted when the children developed in that way.

Second time was: One Diwakar who was the Governor of Karnataka - he had come to visit our school as a commission from the Govt. of India. I saw that Mother was so kind, so gentle ... First of all She folded Her hands and did namaste to him. He was a disciple yet Mother was so gentle and then I was standing with Her and then She and I and Dr. Diwakar went to Sri Aurobindo's room. She took him to the whole of Sri Aurobindo's room, we came out and then She sat in the next room in the seat where She used to give, afterwards, darshan. Then She talked to him about the Centre of Education and so on. This is the second time when Commission of Education had come and I had the opportunity of meeting the Mother at that time.


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Third time was when I had visit of a few teachers from the country. Government of India had sent them here to see our school and I arranged the whole program. When I went with them to the Mother, it was a wonderful experience for me because Mother looked at me for 15 minutes, at a stretch. It was so marvellous that all other teachers were surprised. They were all left out as if the meeting was only for me. For 15 minutes at a stretch without any wink of Her eyes. She went on and on. There was another experience which I should narrate. You know I was in charge of all the boardings of the school and I used to give to the Mother, on a previous day, the date of the birthday of the given boarding. Once I made a mistake and gave a wrong date - six months earlier than the real birth date. Now, I was waiting that the people of the boarding will come. First they will meet me and then I will take them to the Mother. They did not turn up because it was not their birthday. So I realised that perhaps I made a mistake. Then I called the children, I went to the boarding, I brought the person in charge of the boarding. "Please come, today is your birthday." They said, "This is not our birthday." (Laughs) Then I went to Pavitra da and said, "I made a terrible mistake and I have given a wrong date to the Mother." He said, "What can I do?" I said, "Please tell the Mother." He said, "I won't tell the Mother. One doesn't know there will be bombardment or what kind." Then I went to Vasudha ben and said, "Please tell the Mother." She said, "I won't tell the Mother." (Laughter) Then I made myself bold to go to the Mother. I went inside and said, "Mother, I wish that the whole earth may burst out so that I may go down. I made a big mistake, please pardon me. She was so kind ... so kind . . . She looked at me and She said, "But this is the birth date. " "This is the birth date, correct date," She said. "From now onward this is the birth day." She said. She changed the birth date of the boarding. Then She said, "Bring them all inside". I brought them all inside. She was so kind, so kind . . . I've never seen such kindness anywhere in the world.

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Interviewer: Kireet Bhai, you used (words indecipherable) to see the Mother quite often, no?

Prof. Kireet Joshi: Quite often but not very often - birthdays and so on.

Interviewer: Could you tell us a little bit of Mother....

Prof. Kireet Joshi: Mother was very kind to everybody actually. I cannot tell you anything because my mind is so full of kindness of the Mother. I can only say that it is unsurpassable kindness on the earth. She was so kind to everybody, so sweet. Really, when we say Douce Mere, it is really a correct description of the Mother. Douce Mere.

I used to go to Delhi almost every year to bring the money from the Govt. of India grant. In 1966, when Indira Gandhi had become the Prime Minister of India, the Mother had given me a work to get the recognition of Ashram - not Centre of Education, Ashram as Centre of Yoga and Education so that (there is) no division between the Ashram and Centre of Education. I had written a letter to Indira Gandhi and I wanted to give it to her - but through whom was the question. I spoke to one of the members of the Parliament - who was the deputy leader of the Parliament - (first name not decipherable) Ghosh, who was a disciple of the Mother. He said, "I will take the letter to the Prime Minister." Then I happened to meet Dr. Karan Singh the same day and I told him, "This is the letter that I have to give to Indira Gandhi." He said, "You give it to me, I shall give it to Indira Gandhi." Then I was in a kind of a dilemma. To whom to give the letter? So I wrote to the Mother saying this is the dilemma. She sent me a telegram: " You give yourself to her. " (Laughter) It was 18th of February that year and 21st February was coming very soon and I wanted to be here for the darshan on 21st February but I didn't get the appointment with the Prime Minister. So I wrote to the Mother saying the time is now running out. So Mother sent me a telegram: "Persevere. Love and Blessings." Persevere, go on trying. I got the chance only on 21st February. So I gave the letter to Indira Gandhi. Of course that letter had a good fortune. Ultimately


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Ashram was recognised as a Centre of Yoga and Education. And that was a very useful letter. Mother said, "Keep it very carefully. "

(There) was another experience also. Whenever I used to go to Delhi it was my feast time because every day I used to report to the Mother of my efforts and every day I used to receive a telegram from the Mother: "Love and Blessings." Every day. Sometimes I used to stay there for 15 days, 20 days but every day I used to write a letter to the Mother and every day She used to reply through telegram: "Love and Blessings."

There are so many crowded memories in my mind but I will tell you two or three other things. One day I read out to Her a message to the youth which I had written down and She liked it very very much. She was very happy. That very evening there was a program when the Deputy Director General of UNESCO was to come here. So She said, "You read out the speech there, in the Ashram theatre." There was another occasion when I had prepared some kind of an anthology of Sri Aurobindo's action. It was a long, long anthology of about 25 pages. I had read out to Her and She had complete patience and She read out and said, "Put this paragraph here, paragraph there and so on." She minutely read it and one day suddenly in September 1970 or 71, I told the Mother, "I want to prepare a book for the youth of India. She said, "That's a very good idea. Come from tomorrow, every evening." It was a kind of a great boon to me and I took my passages which I had chosen. She said, "First of all refutation of materialism should be the first part. " Then I had my program of reading out about subconscient, conscient, superconcient and so on. She said, "No, no, no. After the refutation of materialism you come to Supermind." So I came to the conclusion the Mother wants to tell the children of India what is Supermind. I read out to Her every evening; afterwards it was every alternate evening because Nirod da in the meantime said he wanted to read out to Her a book that he was writing on Sri Aurobindo. So Mother told me, "I am now changing a little. Instead of coming every evening you will come every alternate evening." Then from the month of November X was


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also asked to come with me and thereafter from the month of December, January some more teachers also used to come and this went on up to 30th of March, 1973. Some of the conversations are there in the Collected Works of The Mother - very very interesting answers which Mother used to give to all the teachers. Two or three teachers, like X who always used to come with us. Kittu used to come with us and X and myself.

Another experience which I would like to remember is: When I was preparing something about Sri Aurobindo's action, I told the Mother that, after having understood what Mother wants to do for India's solutions for the problems, that Auroville is the content of Sri Aurobindo's action. She said, "Yes, yes it is true. " I said, "I have a great aspiration that there should be not only one Auroville but Aurovilles all over the country where there is no authority excepting the authority of the Truth and no religions excepting the Truth." She was so pleased when I said these words. She said, "Excellent, excellent, excellent. " Champaklal ji was sitting thereby and he was so enthused by this answer of the Mother he stood up and said, "Kireet, remember what the Mother is saying. Now you print this answer of the Mother - thousands of copies and distribute all over the country." So it was a very memorable experience of mine.

Interviewer: What is the most important and the most striking thing that you remember She told you about Auroville?

Prof. Kireet Joshi: She said, that I have three steps of my action. My first action was the establishment of the Centre of Education. My second action is Auroville. My third action is Sri Aurobindo 's action. This is the most important thing because I was absolutely, in my heart, completely sure that Auroville is a part of the Mother's action on the earth. I became absolutely sure. In fact Auroville has always given me great enthusiasm, right from the beginning. At one time when Auroville was being . . . just some plots of land were bought, I had taken a bus with my students of the Centre of Education - some of them - and all the way from here to Auroville we shouted, "We shall build Auroville." It was, as it were, Mother


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was all the time here in my heart and She was giving me enthusiasm for Auroville. When Auroville was to be inaugurated in 1968 -28th of February... In the month of January also - X and I wrote a letter to the Mother that we would like to offer some services to the program of Auroville. She wrote down in French: "It will be excellent. Up till now I have not told you to work for Auroville because I thought you were very busy with the school work but it will be very nice if Kireet takes charge of all the youths who are coming for the inauguration. " So from that day I took charge of all the youths who were to come and I accommodated all of them in the houses of Ashram. Of course I had taken the opportunity of taking them all to Auroville just about 9.30 or so, the time which was fixed for the inauguration and the relay of Mother's message. Of course there was some unpleasant moment on the previous day which I will not narrate now here but ultimately it went off and I came to... Mother rescued me actually from a very big problem. At 1 o' clock at night I heard Mother saying, "Go to Udar", for solution of the problem which I was facing and I went to Udar at 10' clock in the night and it was all closed. But in the morning I went to his house and he was ready at 5 o' clock and he arranged everything immediately. He answered my question and I was able to come... I must say the children of our school helped tremendously in the inauguration. At one time we had the idea that we shall start Auroville school with some of the children of our school here in Auroville but then there were some difficulties it could not be done. And then when some people's children were to be admitted to the school I had taken the applications to the Mother and She said, "No, don't take them in our school. Let them start the school there." That also gave me an indication that Mother wanted to make a new experiment in education.

Interviewer: How would you explain to new people, Kireet Bhai, that Auroville is an adventure. In what way is Auroville an adventure. How can ...tell people that?


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Prof. Kireet Joshi: First of all, there is of course a goal which is prefixed in the sense that it's going to be a social, collective organisation which will be a kind of a group which will respond to the supramental manifesation. This goal was very clear to me but how it will come about - there was hardly anything there excepting a few plots of land. One could have never imagined that Auroville would ever even come into existence because there was no money, there was no program and no way of informing the world that we are creating this (laughs). So it was an impossible thing, nothing but an adventure because without any preparation whatsoever -at least from my side I can see that there was no preparation at all. And I know how difficult was the time after Mother left Her body. Auroville would have collapsed completely and yet it is going so strong. Yesterday I was reading Auroville Today and I was reading water resources and so on. It was so interesting to read that so much work was being done which is remarkable and I bless the whole world that Auroville has been created and is continuing, it is existing and I derive so much of happiness on the existence of Auroville and every day is an adventure. I am quite sure that all of you who are living in Auroville, you have no program as if something was prefixed. It's all developing and growing, unchartered actually. So I really feel that it is an adventure of an unprecedented kind. As Mr. Tata said, "Here is one old lady sitting in one room and She says something and young people of the world are coming here. It's a miracle. How can it happen?" Mr. Tata was a great helper to the development of Auroville.

Interviewer: Suppose you would speak to children who are new to Auroville because there are some children who come to Auroville - I mean their parents come - and they come with their parents. They are 6 years old, or 8 years old. How would you tell them: "Who was the Mother?"

Prof. Kireet Joshi: I would simply say that... Look at the whole universe first of all and imagine something more than universe and that was the Mother. That was the starting point of my answer to the children. Look at the whole universe and imagine


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somebody who is greater than the universe and that was the Mother and even now She is their Mother. As far as the powers of the Mother are concerned, well, I know that any question that I put to Her, even inwardly, is answered immediately. There was a time when I was in need of a teacher to be appointed and the next day somebody would appear and Mother would say, "Take this teacher to teach in the school." So spontaneous and so easy. For everything there was complete opening, as it were. All questions were answered easily and smoothly without any difficulty at all. Smoothness is the one word I can use, completely smooth. The Mother who is your friend, your teacher, your guide and you are completely safe in Her lap. This is what I would like to say to our children. If you want a lap of complete smoothness without any worry, think of the Mother and slide down at Her feet, in Her lap all the problems are resolved.

Interviewer: Suppose they ask: How can we enter in contact with Her?

Prof. Kireet Joshi: You just tell the Mother: "I just come in contact with you and She will come because You must remember that Mother is a servant of servants. She is a servant actually. Always She used to feel that She is a servant actually, almost... Always you used to feel that She wants to serve you. It may look rather strange but my own experience with the Mother was that She wanted to help me and serve me as much as possible and to the most extent. You know one day I was in the Ministry of Education and there was one difficult financial adviser who was blocking our grant. So I went to a room next to her which was empty which was the reception room and I prayed to the Mother and had a vision, that Mother was signing that file. (Laughter). And then after 5 minutes that lady called me and said to me, "I have signed already. I like your institution very much." She was the most difficult woman to deal with.

So I would only tell the children, "Just tell the Mother: I want to be in your lap and you will be in Her lap." She answers immediately. Just as She answered my question: 'Mother, I want


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to teach' and the next day, Pavitra da who never knew me, he comes in looking for me. What an answer, immediate answer! As Mother said, every sincere prayer is answered immediately, instantaneously. And it is true to my experience and I had many many experience of this kind. I just prayed and the answer was given. One day when I went to Geneva and said, "I wished X was here." (Laughter). It is a fact, in Geneva X was there to help me and actually we typed out the first draft of the Auroville Act in Geneva. Of course it would afterwards modified several times. This is how.... Any child who wants to see the Mother you tell the child, "You tell the Mother, 'Mother I want to see you', She will do something for you and you will have satisfaction, 'Yes, I have seen.' You ask the Mother and She would answer it." The only point is that we don't ask. We want to do ourselves but we do not know how to ask the Mother. But intensity must be so great... Even here for example, in 2010 I came here. On the 8th of February, 2010, I had a very intense crisis. I prayed to the Mother: "Mother, please relieve me from this crisis", and then I had the vision - it was not a dream but a vision - in which I saw Her distributing things in the playground to many people, a long line, and in that line I was present. Then I knelt at the feet of the Mother and She said to me, "Come away to the Ashram." Then I came away here.

Interviewer: Same day, in fact.

Prof. Kireet Joshi: Not same time, I mean, you might say that same ... actually I remained for two months more because I had some work to finish but something again came and told me, "Today is the day when you should go." On the same day I left, I came here. So this is how Mother, even now, She is actively working. This is how you can tell the children that if you want to see the Mother you must ask but ask sincerely. You must be sincere. Sincerity is the only thing that Mother wants. She wants seriousness, sincerity and infinite reverence for the Divine. Even for education, I think, Mother has said that deep reverence for the Divine must be developed from the childhood, among the children. It's a part of spiritual education, you might say.


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I think we have done a lot, no?

Interviewer: Thank you so much Kireet Bhai I think we have taken enough of your time.

Prof. Kireet Joshi: Fine, thank you.

Interviewer: Thank you so much.

Prof. Kireet Joshi: Thank you so much, thank you.

15th March, 2013, interview by Christine,

filmed by Olivier Barot (Transcription by Jothi Charles,

Auroville)

Courtesy: Auroville

(Prof. Kireet Joshi (1931 - 2014) was Registrar of Sri Aurobindo International Centre of Education, Puducherry. A scholar and author, he was Special Secretary to the Government of India from 1983 to 1988 and Chairman of Auroville Foundation from 1999 to 2004.)

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Mother's Messages

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PART - II

CHAPTER-3

October 23, 1937

(A prayer for those who wish to serve the Divine)

Glory to Thee, O Lord, who triumphest over every obstacle.

Grant that nothing in us shall be an obstacle in Thy work.

Grant that nothing may retard Thy manifestation.

Grant that Thy will may be done in all things and at every

moment.

We stand here before Thee that Thy will may be fulfilled in us,

in every element, in every activity of our being, from our

supreme heights to the smallest cells of the body.

Grant that we may be faithful to Thee utterly and for ever.

We would be completely under Thy influence to the exclusion

of every other.

Grant that we may never forget to own towards Thee a deep,

an intense gratitude.

Grant that we may never squander any of the marvellous

things that are Thy gifts to us at every instant.

Grant that everything in us may collaborate in Thy work and

all be ready for Thy realization.

Glory to Thee, O Lord, Supreme Master of all realization.

Give us a faith active and ardent, absolute and unshakable in

Thy Victory.

- The Mother

Prayers and Meditations


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Nolini Kanta Gupta's first meeting with Sri Aurobindo

Extracts from the book 'Reminiscences'

It was during my stay at the Manicktolla gardens that I had my first meeting and interview with Sri Aurobindo. Barin had asked me to go and see him, saying that Sri Aurobindo would be coming to see the Gardens and that I should fetch him. Manicktolla was in those days at the far end of North Calcutta and Sri Aurobindo lived with Raja Subodh Mullick near Wellington Square in the South Calcutta area. I went by train and it was about four in the afternoon when I reached there. I asked the doorman at the gates to send word to Mr. Ghose - this was how he used to be called in those days at the place - saying that I had come from Barin of the Manicktolla Gardens. As I sat waiting in one of the rooms downstairs, Sri Aurobindo came down, stood near me and gave me an enquiring look and I said in Bengali, "Barin has sent me. Would it be possible for you to come to the Gardens with me now?" He answered very slowly, pausing on each syllable separately - it seemed he had not yet got used to speaking Bengali - and said, "Go and tell Barin, I have not yet had my lunch. It will not be possible to go today. " So, that was that. I did not say a word, did my namaskara and came away. This was my first happy meeting with Him, my first darshan and interview.

The first Pranam to the Mother

In the beginning, Sri Aurobindo would refer to the Mother quite distinctly as Mira. For some time afterwards (this may have extended over a period of years) we could notice that He stopped at the sound of M and uttered the full name Mira as if after a slight


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hesitation. To us it looked rather queer at the time, but later we came to know the reason. Sri Aurobindo's lips were on the verge of saying "Mother"; but we had yet to get ready, so He ended with Mira instead of saying Mother. No one knows for certain on which particular date at what auspicious moment, the word "Mother" was uttered by the lips of Sri Aurobindo. But that was a divine moment in unrecorded time, a moment of destiny in the history of man and earth; for it was at this supreme moment that the Mother was established on this material earth, in the external consciousness of man. Let me now end this story for today with a last word about myself.

I have said that so far the Mother had been to us a friend and companion, a comrade almost, at the most an object of reverence and respect. I was now about to start on my annual trip to Bengal in those days I used to go there once every year, and what was perhaps my last trip. Before leaving, I felt a desire to see the Mother. The Mother had not yet come out of Her seclusion and Sri Aurobindo had not yet retired behind the scenes. I said to him, "I would like to see Her before I go." Her with a capital H, in place of the Mother, for we had not yet started using that name. Sri Aurobindo informed the Mother. The room now used by Champaklal was the Mother's room in those days. I entered and waited in the Prosperity room, for Sri Aurobindo used to meet people in the verandah in front. The Mother came in from Her room and stood near the door. I approached Her and said, "I am going," and lay prostrate at Her feet. That was my first Pranam to the Mother. She said, "Come back soon." This "come back soon" meant in the end, "come back for good."

Courtesy: Sri Aurobindo Ashram Trust, Puducherry

* * *

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Amrita's first darshan of Sri Aurobindo

Extracts from the book 'Reminiscences'

In 1905 I came to Pondicherry for study. In 1910 Sri Aurobindo also arrived here. What a coincidence! He came to the very town where I had come! I was full of joy thrilled with delight.

A strong desire arose in me that I must see Sri Aurobindo. He had been there in our town for six months, very few knew of His arrival, but I knew of it in the third day itself.

***

(...) Two years passed by.

Finally one day, at about 6 in the evening, my friend Krishnaswamy Chettiar and I started from Muthialpet, a suburb of Pondicherry, - near about our present Sports Ground and proceeded towards the beach where Sri Aurobindo's house stood.

***

When Chettiar and I approached Sri Aurobindo's house we found the door bolted. We both knocked at it with some hesitation. All on a sudden the door opened and was left ajar. Sri Aurobindo had come quietly and turned back immediately as the door opened it looked as if he did not want to let us have the glimpse of His face.

In that fading twilight only His long hair hanging gracefully upon His back and His indescribably beautiful small feet caught my eyesight! My heart throbbed within me as though I had been lifted up into the region of the gods! It took me long to come back to normal composure.

***

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Sri Aurobindo's birthday was drawing near - August 15, 1913. I requested Iyengar once more. I appealed to him to take me to Sri Aurobindo on His birthday. He replied, wonderful to say, in a consenting tone. I felt an immense joy.

***

I was soon called in. I got up and approached Sri Aurobindo's table. From the ceiling hung a hurricane-lamp that served to dispel the darkness only partially. Going round Sri Aurobindo by way of pradaksina I stood in His presence with joined palms and made my obeisance to him. Sri Aurobindo's eyes, it seemed, burned brighter than the lamp light for me; as He looked at me, in a trice all gloom vanished from within me, and His image was as it were installed in the sanctum sanctorum of my being. Nothing was very clear to me. I went behind him, stood again in front, offered my homage to Him and not knowing whether to stay or go I staggered perplexed. Sri Aurobindo made a gesture with His heavenly hands to one of those who stood there. A sweet was given me once again. I felt within that He had accepted me though I did not quite know it. I left Sri Aurobindo's house and proceeded towards my own.

***

One day, it was noon. I proceeded as usual to Sri Aurobindo's house. No human voice was heard as I walked down the street. The sun was at the meridian; it was all lustre. So extraordinary was its light that nothing could keep hiding in the places lit up wide by it; all must come to light... Unaccountably joyful, I entered Sri Aurobindo's house. I found Bejoykanta waiting in the verandah downstairs and, on seeing me, he called me to him, his face smiling. I too approached him with a heart full of delight, not knowing why. He then said, "I told Sri Aurobindo about you and also told Him about your strong desire to see Him." (Nowadays we say, "to have darshan.") Bejoykanta added, "I was just thinking how and through whom to send for you. Come up, let's go..." It was for the first time I got up to the first floor of Sri Aurobindo's house. In the long verandah overlooking the wide courtyard below, there


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were big windows giving a wide view southwards... all the doors of all the rooms were open... Everywhere and on everything there fell an all-revealing light, nothing but light... nothing was seen covered or screened, nothing was unrevealed... no spots hidden from light... My heart too, unwittingly, with no doors to close or conceal anything, free of confusion or perplexity, wide open, soared up in sheer delight! I was in this state and Sri Aurobindo stood there, His eyes gazing southwards .... His small feet appeared to my eyes as two red lotuses. His hair partly hung on His chest, partly on his back. It was still wet from His bath; water dripped from its ends. His bare, broad chest shone in great beauty ... His divine gaze did not yet turn towards me...

Bejoykanta got up first, I followed him, reached the head of the long corridor and, as I just stood there, Sri Aurobindo, who was about 20 feet away, turned His eyes upon me. Whether I walked to Him or took a leap to Him, I do not know. What I remember is that a lamp was lit everywhere in me and I saw in a spontaneous and automatic movement in front of me an intense celestial beauty. My being unknowingly swam, as it were, in a sea of silence, it fell prostrate at the lotus feet of the Master, it, did not utter "My Refuge, my Refuge," but lay there body, life and mind all together in a single block. Sri Aurobindo touched me with His flower-like hands and made me stand up. I drank the drink He gave me. That eternal sight still lives in my memory in the same form. I do not know why I burst into sobs as I clasped Him. Tears streamed down from my eyes. (...)

Courtesy: Sri Aurobindo Ashram Trust, Puducherry

* * *

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Champaklal's visions at Auroville

Extracts from the book 'Visions of Champaklal' by Roshan

and Apurva

Golden figure enveloping Auroville

Unexpectedly, again on 4th January 1979 I had an occasion to go to Matrimandir.

As we reached there, brother Gerard came forward affectionately with a smiling face and welcomed us with the words "Hallo, Champaklal!" and told me, "There is a friend and he will show you everything. It is already arranged."

This time we walked' about in the lower part of the construction and could have seen all, but as there was not much time at. our disposal we saw only as much as was possible.

The atmosphere is such that one would not like to move from there. It holds us fast like a magnet. It is a splendid elevating atmosphere, calm and grandly beautiful, such as one would not like to leave. But as we had to go to our brother Narad's garden, there was not enough time to be detained there, and so we left after remaining as much as it was possible to do.

The Matrimandir that I saw this time was superb, wonderful beyond imagination. I saw above Matrimandir, standing in space, a huge figure reaching the heavens and enveloping the whole of Auroville. It would be described only as extremely majestic and grand, immeasurably vast, stupendous, exceedingly resplendent, scintillating, golden, radiant and with an absolutely fascinating form. One by one innumerable hands arose from each part of the body of that figure. Little by little, the figure began to rise up and up and, as it did so, hands appeared on its lower part also. After a while the figure gradually began to descend. At this time all its


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palms were open and spread out in space. A crystalline liquid was spreading forth everywhere from those palms. It was a very bright glistening liquid and it covered all Matrimandir and then, from Matrimandir itself, streams of that crystalline liquid began to emerge and the whole of Auroville was turned into a large lake filled with that liquid.

Far off countless men, boys and girls were visible on all the four sides and they were watching with joy the crystalline lake. At last they began to enter into the lake one by one. Some of them were floating above while some were merged inside; but the liquid was so transparent that all the persons were visible.

Then that multi-handed figure came out of the lake, but this time, instead of hands, all its body was full of eyes. Afterwards the figure in the form of a golden light began to ascend, and mid-way it became stationary. Then, like rays from the sun, golden light spread out from the figure and began to spread all around.

Then lo! There was no lake. In its place, there was a big beautiful garden. At different places, the buildings were bright with that golden light. The atmosphere was full of fragrance of many kinds spreading out from many flowers. Along with this was heard the ringing of many bells accompanied by sweet music.

The vision ended, but it is not adequately rendered into words.

Inner significance of the foundation ceremony

Our brother Narad had arranged on 21st February 1979, The Mother's birthday, a flower-show at his place in Auroville as a loving offering to our Divine Mother from his dedicated family. For me to go to his garden would have been a joy even on any other day, to see brother Narad with his plants as if he were near the Mother. The plants speak to him, of course the plants speak to others also, but everyone does not hear. When he is near the plants, his face beams. It is a happy sight to see him and the plants together. His love for nature and his devotion thrill us. If one loves nature and becomes one with nature, one gets the feeling of being in another world when one is in his garden.


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As soon as we reached his place, we entered into a pleasant, joyful and devotional atmosphere. We saw all the flowers arranged in a very simple and artistic way, with their significances given by the Mother. It was not only a show of flowers but their living presence. All the flowers were expressing themselves and it was very difficult to move away from their presence.

After we had seen the garden, we were taken to the top of Matrimandir, to the Meditation Hall. We sat there for some time. It was very quiet. The atmosphere was extremely peaceful and full of dynamic force.

I saw the Mother with Her supreme sweet smile pouring all Her love. The hall was filled with supreme Love. She caressed my head for a few seconds, with both hands, and put Her seal on my forehead by way of a soft kiss. I saw in the Hall nothing except brilliant golden Light. I felt She covered both my eyes with Her palms, the way She used to do when She was in Her physical body.

I saw the Auroville Foundation Ceremony of 28th February 1968 as I had heard it being narrated to the Mother then. But now I saw all with an inner significance. I saw the Mother just above each youth participating in the Foundation Ceremony, with Her beatific, sweet, supreme smile. She radiated bright golden light and Her Divine Love. This reminded me of Krishna's Ras Lila. Each participant was on a lion, holding his country's flag in one hand and the earth of his land in the other, marching towards the Foundation Urn. The whole sight was magnificent. The lions were beautiful and most majestic in a shining golden colour. Their huge manes were almost touching the ground. The whole atmosphere was permeated with some unseen substance. This day of 28th February 1 968 was unique in the world's history - as expressed in an ancient Sanskrit saying "Na Bhuto Na Bhavishayate" it has never happened before and will not occur in the future!

This vision reminds me of what the Mother once told me -that the flowers of Divine Love, which She used to give to Kamala for preparing Blessing Packets, were charged by Her. Now She


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gave me the experience of how She would do it. I saw the whole Meditation Hall of Matrimandir charged with the supreme Divine Love.

When I went to Matrimandir on 7th December 1978, I wanted to go down, but could not do so. The second time on 4th January 1979, when The Mother arranged the visit again, it so happened that I went down but could not go up. Now when She arranged my going for the third time on 21st February 1979, I was taken up. This is the Mother's way - She arranges everything without one's asking! It is all Her Glory and Grace!

"Love of flowers is a valuable help for finding and uniting with the psychic. " - The Mother

Courtesy: Divyanand Kripanidhi, Bardoli & Sri Aurobindo Ashram Trust, Puducherry

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Pavitra's first meetings with Sri Aurobindo

Extracts from the book 'Conversations with Sri Aurobindo'

... Then one morning I arrived in Pondicherry by train. I put up at the Hotel d'Europe and immediately went to the Ashram.

I asked if I could meet Sri Aurobindo. At that time, Sri Aurobindo was still seeing people, He still saw His disciples. He agreed to see me. I explained my position to Him, what I was looking for, why I had left Europe, why I had come to India and what I hoped to find here. It was I who spoke the first day. He asked me to come again the next day.

In the evening I met the Mother. About the Mother I remember I remember especially Her eyes, Her eyes of light. I repeated my story to Her, more briefly perhaps. She spoke a few words to me and then I returned to my hotel. I remember I went for a walk on the sea - front and someone said, "Look, there are some


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Swadeshis!" that meant, the people dressed in white who were members of the Ashram. There were not many. There were - how many? - about twelve or fifteen.

The next morning I went back and Sri Aurobindo received me. And it was He who spoke. He told me that what I was seeking ... of course, I had explained to Him my desire for liberation, I had told Him that that is what I was seeking - not so much liberation from rebirth as liberation... liberation from myself, from the ego, from ignorance and sin, from falsehood, from all that makes up the ordinary human life. Liberation, Moksha, that was my ideal. I didn't place it in some other heaven, I didn't particularly want to avoid suffering - it was the weight of ignorance, of falsehood, of ugliness, all that. And more than avoiding something, I was looking for something positive. I was looking for light - not so much the avoidance of suffering, the end of suffering nor the end of falsehood, but Light, Knowledge, Truth.

Then He told me that there were some people in India who could give me what I was looking for, but they were not easy to meet, especially for a European. And then He continued. He considered that what I was seeking - union with God, the realization of the Brahman - came first, as a first step, a necessary stage, but it was not everything. There was a second step - the descent of the Power of the Divine into the human consciousness in order to transform it, and this is what He, Sri Aurobindo, was trying to do. And He said to me, "Well, if you want to try, you may stay."

I fell at His feet. He gave me His blessing and it was over. You see, a whole chapter of my life had come to an end. The search, the search for the source of light, the search for the one who would lead me to the Truth was over. Something else was beginning -the realization, to put it into practice. But this time I had found Sri Aurobindo, I had found my guru.

So that is how I came here.

* * *


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(About Pavitra [Philippe Barbier Saint Hilaire], a disciple who passed away on 16 May 1969) Not many yogis, not even the greatest among them could do such a thing. There he is, within here, quite wakeful, looking in a rather amused way at what you people are doing. He is merged in me wholly, that is dwelling within me, not dissolved: he has his personality intact.

- The Mother 25 May 1969

Words of The Mother, Pg 182, Vol 13, Collected Works of The Mother

Courtesy: Sri Aurobindo Ashram Trust, Puducherry

* * *


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Their vigilant eyes kept watch (Nirodbaran)

Extracts from the book 'Memorable Contacts with

The Mother' by Nirodbaran

I was sleeping in the passage in front of Sri Aurobindo's room. I heard someone calling out "Nirod" in a very sweet and melodious voice which was very distinct. I was startled out of my sleep and exclaimed, "Who is there? Who is calling?" Somebody was perhaps asking for help, I thought. I switched on the light and saw it was 3.25 a.m. I took it to be the Mother's voice. In the morning, when I told Her about it She said, "Ah! But I told you many things. " About the time also She replied, " Yes, that's exactly the time."

***

Nearly a month later, during the morning Pranam, the Mother said to me smiling, "You were quite a long time with Sri Aurobindo last night, quite a long time. And yesterday, when you came for Pranam and were taking flowers, I saw him behind you in a dazzling white light."


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The following day Champaklal told me that during his meditation in the Mother's room he had a long dream in which Sri Aurobindo was telling me how all the pains that He had felt at each stage of His last illness were felt by Champaklal himself in his body. Champaklal was full of joy and gratitude for this recognition on the Master's part.

He also saw that Sri Aurobindo was teaching me Sanskrit, particularly how to read it correctly. This was very strange! for I had been thinking of learning it, specially to read in the proper way, not in the Bengali manner.

All this proves what the Mother had told me - that She used to see Sri Aurobindo busy with me. It is equally true of the Ashram, as a whole. I am quite sure that His vigilant eye is keeping watch day and night over all our movements and activities, as it had done before.

Courtesy : Sri Aurobindo Ashram Trust, Puducherry

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August Darshan of 1937 (Udar Pinto)

Extracts from the book 'Udar - One of Mother's Children'

Edited by Gauri Pinto

From 1934 to 1937, though I had been in Pondicherry (now called Puducherry), most of the time and had many friends in the Ashram, I had never entered the Ashram main building or felt like going for a 'Darshan'. I was just busy making money and having a good time. My friends in the Ashram were first Amal (K.D. Sethna), Purani, Ambu, Dr. Ramchandra and some others.

Mona and I were married in February 1937 and then we had several more friends in the Ashram. They suggested that we should go for Darshan and it was arranged for us to go on August 15th, 1937. In those days those who went for Darshan had their names


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listed and the time for each person to be present was indicated on it. Our time was just before noon.

We dressed in our best clothes and went upstairs and were led into the Darshan room and then I received a shock, which I had not at all expected.

It was my first sight of Sri Aurobindo and the words that came into my head were, "I have seen majesty at last!" - This word, 'majesty', had attracted me, both for its sound and meaning, and I had often regretted not ever having seen it. I had seen majestic robes and crowns, but no majestic person. Here I saw - no wonderful robes or any crown - just a simple dhoti and chaddar, but such a wonderful figure of Majesty. I was also a bit awed. Then I looked at the Mother and saw there so much sweetness and love that I just went up to Her and put my head into Her lap. Mona did the same.

I may mention here that our entry was specially noted by Sri Aurobindo. I saw that when we entered He looked at the list and asked the Mother about us. She confirmed all this later. We were a fine-looking pair. The Mother even remarked to Datta that She did not know English girls could be so beautiful. She was referring to Mona, of course.

Then, after the Mother had blessed me and caressed my head in Her lap, I took up courage to put my head in His lap and felt His love and sweetness that went with His majesty. Then I put my head between Them and both blessed me together. Such a marvelous experience! I feel I must share the thrill of it with others so I write about it in so much detail.

Courtesy: Sri Aurobindo Udyog Trust, Puducherry

* * *

... Now a life's weary quest shall be fulfilled, for on my brow his promise He has sealed. (lines from the poem 'Promise' by Nirodbaran.)


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Sri Aurobindo is here (Amal Kiran)

Amal Kiran interviewed by Sudhanshu Mohanty,

published in 'The Golden Chain' magazine (August 2002)

This Errant Life

This errant life is dear although it dies;

And human lips are sweet lips though they but sing

Of stars estranged from us; and youth's emprise

Is wondrous yet, although an unsure thing.

Sky-lucent Bliss untouched by earthiness!

I fear to soar lest tender bonds decrease.

If Thou desirest my weak self to outgrow

Its mortal longings, lean down from above,

Temper the unborn light no thought can trace,

Suffuse my mood with a familiar glow.

For 'tis with mouth of clay I supplicate:

Speak to me heart to heart words intimate,

And all thy formless glory turn to love

And mould Thy love into a human face.

- K.D. Sethna (Amal Kiran)


"A very beautiful poem, one of the very best you have written. The last six lines, one may say even the last eight, are absolutely perfect. If you could always write like that, you would take your place among English poets and no low place either. I consider they can rank- these eight lines - with the very best in English poetry. "- The Secret Splendour, P. 70

Sri Aurobindo's comment about the poem S.M : "What did Sri Aurobindo tell you the first time you met Him?"

A: "Nothing! He did not tell me anything. I just looked at his face. I was all the time watching His face, His beard, and His


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moustache and was thinking to myself that I can choose this man as my Guru. Then I came away. Later, I asked the Mother, 'What did Sri Aurobindo say about me?' She replied, 'He said you have a good face.'

S.M. "What was your experience on 29.2.1956, the day of the Supramental Manifestation?"

A: "That night I was travelling by train from Pondicherry to Madras. (It was as if I was the only hindrance in the way of the Supramental Descent.) I was asleep. I dreamt that the Mother was sitting in a chair and people were filing past to get Darshan. I was desperately trying to get my slippers off my feet - specially the left foot (it is lame). I was struggling in my sleep but in vain. Then suddenly, I woke up and I saw the Mother standing in the railway compartment. I am not somebody given to see visions, so I closed my eyes and opened them again and She was still standing there, smiling. Not a silhouette or something but really in flesh and blood. Then again, I closed my eyes and opened them to make sure but I couldn't see Her any more. Later I recounted to Her the experience. She reminded me of our conversation of some 17-18 years back when I had requested Her to promise to tell me of the Supramental Descent when it took place. I was overwhelmed with gratitude that She remembered a promise of such a long time back and that too made to a person like me."

Then he talked about how he took up the editorship of Mother India as wished by Sri Aurobindo. "I was completely new to the job. I asked the Mother on what topic to write. She said that Sri Aurobindo wanted me to write on politics. — 'But I don't know anything on the subject and much less about Indian politics.' 'Well!' She replied, 'I also do not know anything about it. But Sri Aurobindo is there. He will do everything.'

Courtesy: Golden Chain Fraternity, Puducherry

* * *

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Sadhak who progressed most in a year (Dyumanbhai)

Extracts from the article by Krishna Chakravarti

published in Sabda

Dyuman "The Luminous" - Karmayogi

The Strength of Dyuman's character is his essential straightness of aim, fidelity to the highest he sees and intensity of will to receive the light and serve the Truth.

-Sri Aurobindo, 10-04-1934

"If Dyuman and a few others had not made themselves the instruments of the Mother and helped her to reorganize the whole material side of the ashram, the Ashram would have collapsed long ago under the weight of mismanagement, waste, self-indulgence, disorder, chaotic self-will and disobedience. He and they faced unpopularity and hatred in order to help Her to save it."

- Sri Aurobindo

* * *

Work, work and work will be my motto, Ceaselessly to work, work for all time. It has no night, no day. To go beyond the time and there to work.

Speech less, advice less, preaching of the sermons less-but to work and to act and to live upto the highest idea. My dear Mother, all love to you.

- Dyuman's prayer to the Mother, 4-12-1949

Amal Kiran on Dyumanbhai

The Mother used to have meetings with some of the disciples in 1928 in the "Prosperity" Room in the Library House. Both Dyuman and I belonged to that group.

Once the Mother raised the question: "Who among you has progressed the most during the past year? "

The answer would not mean which sadhak or sadhika was the most advanced in general. It would declare which one had


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taken the most marked step forward during the preceding twelve months.

While recollecting this question, I turned to Dyuman and asked whether it had struck in his memory too. He said "Yes." Then I asked him whether he recalled the answer. He looked at me but kept quiet. I smiled and said: "We thought of Nolini, Amrita, Champaklal, Pavitra and Anilbaran, all old timers. But the Mother named you." Dyuman's face beamed and he exclaimed: "So you remember this?"

I replied: "Who could forget so great a compliment?"

Courtesy : Sabda Publications June, 2003

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One can advance towards perfection through any work (Pranab Kumar Bhattacharya)

through any work

Extract from the booklet 'What I have learnt from the

Mother' by Pranab Kumar Bhattacharya

Man's aim is to move towards an integral perfection. Life is the field of action given to us for developing that integral perfection. And the path is the total surrender of our life and action.

Sri Aurobindo's sadhana does not exclude the world. It is the integral transformation of the world by bringing down from the heights the Divine Consciousness.

This is not possible solely by human endeavour. The human aspiration from below and the response from above: it is only in the union of these two that this work can be done.

Man with his mind can determine his conduct in the practical, material life but then the very imperfection of man's earthly life can completely unsettle everything. No political ideology, no religious discipline, no philosophical system, no intellectual understanding, no ethical solution or scientific discovery can bring


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about that perfection until man transforms his own nature. And once man's nature is transformed then every activity can be utilized for the work of integral perfection.

But then the question arises; Should man just twiddle his thumbs until the transformation of his nature takes place? Not at all. He has first to be convinced of this truth in his mind and life. And then keeping this truth in full view he should develop himself in all the parts of his being, keep the flame of aspiration constantly burning within him and rely entirely on the Divine Grace.

Man should determine his work according to his nature, capacity and inclination since it is work that helps us in manifesting our inner truth outside. Then it is important to try and turn oneself through one's work and one's work through oneself into something as beautiful as possible.

There is no high and low in work. It is not work that makes man great or small. It is man who makes his work great or small. One can advance towards perfection through any work as long as that work is done with inner sincerity.

At the very outset there is not much that needs to be changed in life from the outside. First one has to change one's attitude in life and then that takes care of the rest.

One has to discover one's inner truth and then allow it as fully as possible to direct one's whole life.

It is not an easy path. At every step there is risk and danger. At every step one's inner sincerity is put to test. But there is no other way.

My personal experience in my own life through all these years has shown me that an invisible Power has guided me all along this path. And it is my innermost conviction that it is this same invisible Power that will continue to guide me till the very end of my life.

Courtesy: Matru Bhaban, Cuttack


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Such is She, Love Incarnate, Emperor of our hearts (Madhav P. Pandit)

Emperor of our hearts ...

Extracts from the book

'The Mother of Love' by M. P. Pandit

With sheer love She has come into this world of hate and falsehood to front the Enemy in his own fief. Unknown to man for whose delivery She has come, She developed Her physical embodiment into a live mould for the Earth's aspiration and when She stepped on the scene, it was Sri Aurobindo, the Seer sempiternal, who proclaimed Her advent to the sons of God and laid at Her feet the domains of the three worlds awaiting transformation, placed in Her hands all the treasures of the Spirit He had garnered from of old.

Such is She, Love Incarnate, Emperor of our hearts, whose one single look is enough to transport us to heights of heroism, extremes of self-abnegation, sublimities of ecstasy. To serve Her in whatever way She allows us to do is our life's highest privilege. To see Her, to get a word from Her gives a sense of fulfilment to our deepest soul.

Speaking today in 1965, in the 87th year of Her golden body through every pore of which seep the soothing drops of Love Divine, through the limpid blue eyes of which stream forth torrents of melting Compassion, this writer cannot but recall the first day he met Her, over twenty five years ago. Oh, the marvel of that moment! His soul burst out of its prison-bars in a flood of tears and tears and tears and each time he looked up to Her, She spoke through Her indrawn eyes in the only language they have ever spoken to him thereafter, the language of Love.

Much has happened during the intervening years. Much has he tried Her phenomenal patience; much has he hurt Her heart of tender solicitude; much has he strayed in the blindness of his ego which She suffered in silence. But not once did She greet him without that familiar glance of Love.


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Gradually, increasingly, totally there came over a change. She had dug and dug tirelessly into the hard layers of his ignorance and lit the chambers of his soul which leaped into the arms of its Maker. All became a sea of Love.

Every day She stoops to pick up the infant clinging to Her knees and dips him into these Waters that transmute. How far is the day when he would walk in the wake of Her strides?

Meanwhile, he is on the sands of the Sea and here are a few of the precious pebbles collected on the shore.

Courtesy: Sri Aurobindo Ashram Trust, Puducherry

** *

"The name acted on me like a mantra"

"My first contact with Sri Aurobindo took place in a strange way. I was thirteen. One afternoon I was idly browsing among books in the office-cum-library of my brother who was an advocate. The dusty bookshelves were full of old leather bound volumes of All-India Law reports. Among them was a big green book which excited my curiosity. I pulled it out and found it was entitled 'Ali pore Bomb Case' . I opened it and my eyes fell on a photograph with the words ARAVINDA GHOSE beneath. The name acted on me like a mantra and I found myself repeating it with obvious delight. It was something sweet and melodious. Later I spoke to my brother of this experience. He wrote about it to my mentor Sri Kapali Sastry who told me that the meaning of my finding the photograph in the book would become evident as I grew up. And so it did."

** *

In 1937, Madhav had his first Darshan of Sri Aurobindo and the Mother on August 15. He wrote later, "It was overwhelming and I felt the only thing comparable to Him was the Himalayas."

** *


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At that time the Mother personally saw to each sadhak and kept a discreet but detailed note of all his actions. Once when Madhav was not in his office, She came in and went through all the shelves and drawers. She found everything kept neatly, beautifully arranged, perfectly organised. Not one thing was out of place. She was so happy that She immediately went to Sri Aurobindo and described what She had seen: the order, the harmony and the organisation. Later one of the attendants narrated this to Madhav and he was naturally delighted.

Spontaneous faculties opened up within him as a natural outcome of his spiritual development. Mother noted once in a letter to him that within the span of a few days he had made the progress of several lives.

** *

The Mother had remarked to Kapali, "He is a speaker!"

** *

Even much later when the Matrimandir was being built, the Mother asked him to go there regularly to give talks on the Synthesis of Yoga.

** *

When writing one of his earliest articles, he recalls, Kapali Sastriar was pacing outside deep in meditation, and there was a special charge in the room. Later when the article was read out to Sri Aurobindo by an attendant, He remarked that He had already heard it before. The attendant explained that it had just been typed. But Sri Aurobindo insisted that He had already heard "every word of it. " On being informed of this Kapali smiled knowingly, and Madhav was overwhelmed with a deep sense of humility.

** *

In the early days of Ashram life, Madhavji's life was organized around the Mother's daily schedule. He would sleep around nine-thirty, and wake up early at one o'clock, or if there was much work even at twelve-thirty. By two o'clock he would be at work.


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It was in these early hours long "before the gods awake" that he typed or wrote many of his works including his Readings in Savitri which more and more people are now discovering and benefiting from.

** *

It is interesting to recall that when he first joined the Ashram, Kapali Sastri told him of the Mother's opinion that he had the potential to be one of the first twenty-five supermen upon earth. Extract from the booklet 'Madhav Panditji' by Shraddhalu Ranade

Courtesy: Publisher

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"We have another plan"

On Dmitrii Sergeevich von Mohrenschildt

-Boris

"To be a philosopher is not merely to have subtle thoughts, nor ever to found a school, but also to love wisdom as to live, according to its dictates, a life of simplicity, independence, magnanimity and trust" (Henry David Thoreau, 1817-1862).

In February 1958 Dmitrii Sergeevich von Mohrenschildt arrived in Sri Aurobindo Ashram for the first time. The Mother looked into him with divine love and he understood that his way was the way of Integral Yoga. Dmitrii wanted to ask Her about his nearest future: what's the best: to live in the Ashram or return to America? He didn't ask, but She answered: "The Power is everywhere, it is possible to move to perfection in any place of the Planet."

Dmitrii returned to the USA, but visited the Ashram again and again. Once he met Mother and told Her: "Sweet Mother, I have a plan how to attract to the Ashram especially significant


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people." She was with Montgomery, the leader of American devotees of Integral Yoga, and answered: " We have another plan: to create the city of the Future."

Since 1976, Dmitrii lived in the Ashram. He was born on 11 April 1902. In numerology his number is nine. Auroville was founded on 28 February 1968 and its number is nine too. I knew that the meaning of the number nine is "intelligence."

Dmitrii passed away on 9 June 2002 at the age of one hundred. He was a professor of History and Comparative Literature, and translator of Sri Aurobindo and Mother. Dmitrii was also a philosopher and guru, a true friend of Auroville. For me he was Socrates and I can invoke Plato's words: "I thank God that I was born in the age of Socrates."

Courtesy: News and Notes, Auroville,

Issue Dt. 24th February 2007

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"There shall be no more Time!"

- Dr. K. R. Srinivasa Iyengar

They were coming still, the stream of visitors to the Ashram swelled day by day till it grew into a flood on the day of darshan. Men, women and children, with their packages and their hold-alls, their Sunday Hindu and their umbrellas, crowded near the gate of the Ashram on the morning of the fifteenth of August 1943—and the sadhaks discharging "gate duty" patiently coped with the rush with a quiet assurance, with a ready smile for one and all. From the four ends of India—from obscure nooks and by-paths, from distant cities and inaccessible hamlets—the pilgrims had assembled in Pondicherry in the vicinity of the Sri Aurobindo Ashram.


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They had come braving the hundred and one annoyances minor and major that our imperfect society engenders in its midst; they had come—these princes and paupers, these financiers and politicians, these landlords and merchants, these poets and philosophers, these students and teachers, these sinners and saints, these seeming scoffers and these half-hearted believers—they had all converged towards the sanctum sanctorum, desiring to have darshan of Sri Aurobindo. Did they know—did all of them know—what darshan meant? What precise experience was in store for them, how exactly it was going to grow into their being and shape their future—they cared not, perhaps, to speculate about all this or, if they did, their minds were baffled in an instant and they quickly gave up the struggle.

Maybe, it was only an idle curiosity that brought some of the visitors to Pondicherry; maybe, some had caught the contagion of enthusiasm from their friends and had therefore proceeded to the Ashram on darshan day to put their half-baked aspirations through the acid test of experience, so that the fluidities of enthusiasm may harden into the pure gold of faith or—failing in the test—break into so many drops and atoms of disillusionment; maybe, some had accidentally chanced to read Yoga and Its Objects or Baji Prabhou or Heraclitus or The Mother or an instalment or two of The Future Poetry, had been swept off their feet, the spark thus enkindled had, day by day, hour by hour, blazed into a bonfire of adoration—unreasoned, irrational adoration—and the poor victims had by sheer gravitational pull, been drawn to the Ashram, they had to count the minutes, the seconds, that divided them from the "unhoped-for elusive wonder"... "the illimitable"... "the mighty one"... "the minstrel of infinity"; maybe, again, some had learned by slow degrees to follow and admire the career of Sri Aurobindo as a nationalist, as a poet, as a philosopher, and yet had failed to go further, had in fact nurtured a giant scepticism about the Yoga of Sri Aurobindo, had even—once or twice—dubbed it all mysticism and moonshine, and had accordingly, come to satisfy themselves whether their own views were not, after all, the correct


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views, whether Sri Aurobindo was not, essentially, a poet and an apostle of nationalism rather than a saint and a mahayogin. There were men and women of all categories, and children too of all categories, some carrying heaven in their hearts, others merely frolic-some and gay, many suddenly charmed and chastened by the Ashram atmosphere, but a few stubbornly resisting even its invisible currents and persisting in their own unique life-force movements and convolutions.

One heard casual remarks, stray greetings, whispered confidences. The premises of the Ashram were filled with a suppressed excitement. One heard the accents of many Indian languages. One idly wandered hither and thither: one gazed and gazed about oneself and—one felt fairly at home in those seemingly exotic and unusual surroundings. What did it matter if one didn't know who one's neighbour was? One knew what he was, or seemed to be,— a co-pilgrim to the shrine of fulfilment. One might speak to one's neighbour if occasions arose—or if the formal introductions had been made—but it was safer, on the whole to sit or move about quietly. It was better to participate in the luxurious repast of silence; it was more becoming to seek refuge in the wisdom and strength of a chastening and uplifting reticence.

Many of the sadhaks, and many even among the visitors, had a noticeably abstracted air. They sat, by themselves or in little clusters, on the pavements or on the steps of a flight of stairs—and seemed to be lost in thought; of them perhaps it was written: ...wisdom's self

Oft seeks a sweet retired solitude,

Where with her best nurse contemplation

She plumes her feathers, and lets grow her wings,

That in the various bustle of resort

Were all too ruffl'd, and sometimes impair'd.

And there were others too—other groups and clusters—and the men and women were agitatedly conversing in pointed jerks, expressive gesticulations, and impatient exclamations. But the generality belonged, perhaps, to neither of these categories.


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The majority of those who had come to the Ashram for the first time wore just a puzzled air: they had indeed come to an Ashram, they were on the threshold of a unique experience (if the sadhaks were to be believed), they were suddenly projected into a strange new world-and they just wondered, they wondered in their ignorance, they wondered in their humility and awe, they just wondered whither all that pageantry was leading, what priceless revelation was waiting for them round the comer, and how exactly they were going to embalm it and preserve it during all the savourless tomorrows of their star-crossed lives.

The queue was being formed at last. It was about two in the afternoon. It was a bright day in Pondicherry, and it was a great day for Pondicherry. The queue was forming, and though the endless line of pilgrims hardly seemed to move, it actually did move on; the coil curved upwards towards the library and reading room, and curved downwards, emerging into the garden, followed for a little while a straight course, soon turning sharply towards the meditation hall. It moved on, like an impossibly long centipede, enveloping the pillars, scaling the stairs now in one direction now in another and at last reaching the very hall, the very spot... The queue was long, with its cusps and crests, links and breaks, its ascents and descents, it swayed and moved, it stopped and moved and swayed, and a hushed expectancy filled the pores and cells of the human frame and even the very chambers of the obscure human heart. How patiently they awaited their proper chance—how statuesque many of them stood, their eyes avoiding the midday glare of the sun, their fingers firmly clasping the Tulsi garland or the fair white flower or the bright red rose—they waited and they moved, they moved and they prayed. "I cannot believe... I want to believe... I must believe... I will believe... let me believe"... and thus even the agnostic prayed, and hope and despair warred in his bosom, and he held the garland in a yet firmed grasp.

The last turn was taken. One's eyes grazed over the intervening pilgrims and rested on the two figures seated together in unblenched majesty and aura serene. The Mother and Sri Aurobindo! The great


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moment had come... the presence was a flood of Light and Truth... and the mere mind staggered under the blow, the mere human frame lurched forward mechanically, but the eyes were held irretrievably in a hypnotic spell. Thought was impossible then... the mind had abdicated its sovereignty for the nonce... and one (dare one say it?) had become almost a living soul. The crowning moment of all! One faced the Mother, one faced the Master... it was impossible to stand the smile, it was impossible to stand the penetrating scrutiny of those piercing eyes. A second or two, perhaps, no more... but how can one take count of the fleeting units of Time? One rather glimpsed then the splendorous truth— "There shall be no more Time!" Eternity was implicated in a grain of Time... one all but crossed the boundaries of Space and Time... one experienced a sudden upsurge of glory that was nevertheless grounded on a bottomless humility. And—but already one was out of the room!

The pulses of life started beating once again; the wires, the machinery of the mind were resuming their work once more; the feet knew whither they should go. The heart was agog still with the agitations of the hour—and one returned to one's room to gather, to piece together, the thousand and one fancies, the thousand and one aspirations, that had welled up in prodigious exuberance during that one great moment of timeless Time. One grew quieter, serener, one registered a feeling of singular, inexpressible fulfilment. One was abnormally calm, but one was also radiantly, almost divinely, happy!

The presence that thus flooded my storm-tossed soul and chastened it with the gift of grace bore little resemblance to the published photographs and even less to one's deliberate mental imaginings. And yet—how can I account for it?—it was a truly familiar face. Where had I seen the Master before? I had seen Him ever so often—yet where? The mind raced through the dizzy corridors of thirty-five years of terrestrial life... where, O where had I seen His face before? Was it the face of Zeus that had once held me enraptured as I chanced upon it in a book of mythology?


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... Or was it rather the face of Aeschylus?—Perhaps, Vasishta looked even like this when he blessed Dasaratha's son; and it was thus, perhaps, that Valmiki sat when the whole of Ramayana, even to the minutest particularity, shaped itself before his wise and lustrous eyes! And the vision of the Mother and of the Master-were they in very truth the cosmic Mahashakti and the all-highest Ishwara?—the vision remained, the experience persisted, the memory of the smile eased yet the multitudinous pricks of the work-a-day world, and the memory of the brahmatej, austere yet inconceivably beautiful, that was resplendent on Sri Aurobindo's face yet gave one the hope and the strength to bear the heavy and the weary weight of all this unintelligible world—nay, gave one even the strength to aspire to change it all and boldly to nurture the incipient hope that even the frailest and the foulest clay can evolve—however long the journey and arduous the path—into the supermanhood of the Gnostic Being and the triune glory of Sachchidananda!

(This article was written in August 1943 immediately after his first Darshan of Sri Aurobindo and printed in the November issue of journal named Human Affairs published from Udipi.)

(The original source : Dr. Iyengar's biography of the great sage Sri Aurobindo.)

Courtesy: Overman Foundation, Kolkata

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We are happy to include here a poem by Dr. K.R.S. Iyengar :

"The Seer has fronted reality;

the Poet has hymned his 'Glorified Fields of trance';

the Philosopher has sought to interpret the Vision in terms of reason;

the Yogi has formulated a method, a multiform technique, for

achieving the desired change in consciousness; the Sociologist has

thrown out significant hints in regard to the organisation of

tomorrow's world and the Creative Critic has sensed the rhythms

of the 'future poetry' and described how the new poet will ride on

the wings of an elemental spirituality and articulate the ineluctable

rhythm of the Spirit."

(Raju's Blog http://dsrraju.blogspot.in/2015/01/last-of-great-moguls.html)


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Sri Aurobindo's Savitri lines - Mother's messages

From Savitri:

It saw, it felt, it knew the deity.

Her will was puissant on their nature's acts,

Her heart's inexhaustible sweetness lured their hearts,

A being they loved whose bounds exceeded theirs;

Her measure they could not reach but bore her touch,

Answering with the flower's answer to the sun

They gave themselves to her and asked no more.

One greater than themselves, too wide for their ken,

Their minds could not understand nor wholly know,

Their lives replied to hers, moved at her words:

They felt a godhead and obeyed a call,

Answered to her lead and did her work in the world;

Their lives, their natures moved compelled by hers

As if the truth of their own larger selves

Put on an aspect of divinity

To exalt them to a pitch beyond their earth's.

They felt a larger future meet their walk;

She held their hands, she chose for them their paths:

They were moved by her towards great unknown things,

Faith drew them and the joy to feel themselves hers;

They lived in her, they saw the world with her eyes.

The growth of the flame, Book IV Canto 2 - pg.364


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7.12.1950


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PART-III

CHAPTER-4

Nolini Kanta Gupta on Mother's Creation

The Mother's creation is not an isolated construction, that is, it is not a community self-satisfied, self-sufficient, separated from the common universal life. The Mother's work encompasses the whole world; it aims at a transcendence taking up the young and old, the men and women of the Ashram as well as the whole human race. We work for the emergence of a great human race out of this human race and as a consequence a new development of the whole creation - therefore we require a community which will be representative of the whole human race - that is to say, what is not here is nowhere else in the world - a complete sample of the whole earth, the whole human race. How various are the elements which constitute this earthly life, our institution will be a picture of that, a laboratory, as it were, for new creation, which element has to be purified, transformed in which way, which has to be rejected altogether - all this is being experimented. What has been accomplished here has created a possibility, a beginning in the whole earth, in the whole human race.

Reminiscences, XIV

Eternal Youth, Pg 115


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Huta's messages from Mother

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If you want to profit fully from a teaching heard or written, never discuss or argue; keep silent and attentive; thus allowing the teaching so enter your consciousness and do its work in your attentive mind.

After some time you will discover that you have properly under-stood the meaning of the teaching received.

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Never say to the Lord "I need this or that to be able to reach my goals", because He knows better than you what is good for programs and it is just which He gives

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(When I met Hutaji and told her about this book, she carefully selected this and other messages and gave me. I am grateful to her. Varadharajan.)


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Night watch at the soul of the new creation...

- Ruud Lohman

The black expanse above continues to be black, but a play of lightness and delight transforms at every moment this monument under construction into a mind-blowing centre of the three worlds. A single spotlight guides our workers who are from the neighbouring Tamil village and are on a night-duty to keep the recently concreted portion of the north pillar moist. Hundreds of insects of all shapes and colours and levels of evolution are attracted by the light and they fly, jump and bump without any visible pattern against the lens of the spotlight.

That's how I, too, came to Auroville - an insect from somewhere in the dark world, attracted by the one spotlight in the huge night, jumping and bumping around without any as yet visible pattern. The insect does not seek out the light, it is the light that draws the insect. After one and a half year in Auroville I still don't know why or how I came. I did not choose to come here; rather I feel I was chosen. When I broke away from my previous life I told my confreres of the religious order at which I was a member, "As soon as I know why I am going, I may feel ready to come back." Well, I still don't know. But the more I discover something of this reason, the surer I am that I won't go back.

The possibility to feel proud of being an Aurovilian seldom arises when one knows that we are not here on account of personal merits but rather because of the difficulties each one of us represents. So that these can be integrated and transformed in the evolutionary experiment of Auroville.

We all bring with us a particular set of problem, forces, idiosyncrasies as fuel for the cosmic fire. We also represent, each one of us, a particular aspect of the old world that has to be new-made.

I may have been chosen because I represented a strong force in the past age religion. I spent my first night at the beautiful Ashram


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guest house Golconde; the next morning I took the bus to Auroville and it "happened" to be the very day when the excavation of Matrimandir started. I joined the thirty or so people who carried red earth away from the excavation in baskets on their heads and from that first moment I know a lot of things.

I was a theologian. Theologically, I have not come anywhere near 'solving' many of the mental problems involved in my transition from Rome to Auroville, from religion to "no religion", from Jesus and St. Francis of Assisi to Sri Aurobindo and the Mother. But my little victory over theology is that I hardly care any more.

And the amazing thing for me is this; the more I discover Sri Aurobindo, the Integral Yoga and Matrimandir, the more I feel that I have not really broken with my past life as a member of a religious order and an official representative of a religion, but that only now I am slowly becoming what I then spiritually, and occultly was supposed to be.

Courtesy : Sri Aurobindo's action, Puducherry

(Ruud Lohman came to Auroville in 1971 and joined the work of excavation for building Matrimandir. He continued to work on Matrimandir construction till his passing away in July, 1986.)

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Streams of light through doors of eyes (Mauna)

From an article by Mauna from Mother India magazine

In 1969, while running a TV magazine in Holland, I one day remarked to a close musician friend of mine: "Oh dear, I wish I had something to believe in. I have so much energy and it's such a waste to use it only for these dumb little stories we have to feed the public with."

Some weeks later my friend brought me a magazine, 'Bres Planete', in which I found an article by Ruud Lohman, "They build their own city." "I think this is the place you are looking for!" said my friend. I read the article, got in touch with a contact address given in it, went to a reading with slide shows and started reading Satprem's "The Adventure of Consciousness", in Dutch.

New worlds opened for me. Yes, yes, yes... I kept thinking and feeling and sensing. This was it for me.

In order not to come with empty hands I kept my job for another year and it was in September 1971 after a half year of travelling in India (because once I disappear in Auroville, I probably never will get out of it.) that I arrived in Pondicherry, now Puducherry.

Immediately attracted by the very special energy field prevailing in the Ashram, I inwardly had the strong sense that I first needed to get closer, more familiar, more intimate with the Mother before going to Auroville. So I decided to remain in the Ashram for some time.

And then a bizarre problem arose. While I had given up my all and everything, had burned all my ships in order to come to the Mother and Auroville, I now found myself embodying an enormous resistance. For days and days I walked around Pondy, in the park, at the beach, sat in the playground, the Samadhi, continually struggling with thoughts like "How can She be Divine? She was married - even had children. What is divine anyway? etc etc." Until the day came that I finally shook myself, realising "What


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the heck do I care who She is or what She did. Let me listen to Her message."

Having made up my mind, I then was ready. I asked for a darshan and, when the day came (7.11.71), went to the Ashram's flower section to search for a flower to give to Mother. When asked which flower I wanted, I had absolutely no idea and suggested they give me something white.

A friendly sadhak gave me a bunch of white plumeria (psychological perfection) and there I went, to the Samadhi, waiting downstairs, waiting up the stairs, waiting half way... It was a dreamlike, timeless waiting with a strange sort of intensity as if there was no past and no future. Just a very full everlasting moment of waiting, awaiting...

It was as if the space outside of me and the space inside of me became exactly the same, mingling and getting stronger and stronger. I could hear its sound.

And then I found myself in the room and there She was. So very very fragile and almost transparent... almost blue... She was so light, hardly sitting in Her chair.... And the space intensified, throbbing, sounding.

When it was my turn I gave my flower and knelt down for Her as 1 had seen the ones before me do. In one of Sri Aurobindo's 'Letters On Yoga' I had read that one had to "let Mother look into your heart. " So in all my naivety I looked up at Her, opening my eyes for Her to look into them. I didn't look at Her face, at Her looks, I just held my head a bit backwards and found myself opening my eyes, wide, like doors.

And there it came. It was as if two beams or streams bored themselves, very steadily and gradually straight down into me almost like two rods physically drilling downwards, very slowly, very gently... And after staying there for some silent, ageless, timeless time the two beams very gently and slowly withdrew again. I felt them leaving me, and then... I looked at Her. I saw Her face, and She saw mine ... and we smiled and smiled and I felt Her little


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tick on the top of my head and someone gave me a flower, and I floated and smiled and beamed out of the room, downstairs, into the world. And from that time onwards everything, everything was different.

Courtesy: Mother India Magazine, Puducherry

(Mauna is an old timer resident of Auroville working in the field of outreach communication.)

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The Timeless in Time (Rhoda P. Le Cocq)

Article by Rhoda P. Le Cocq from the book 'The Radical

Thinkers - Heidegger and Sri Aurobindo'

As a Westerner, the idea of merely passing by these two (Sri Aurobindo and the Mother) with nothing being said, had struck me as a bit ridiculous.

I was still unfamiliar with the Hindu idea that such a silent meeting could afford an intensely spiritual impetus. I watched as I came up in line, and I noted that the procedure was to stand quietly before the two of them for a few silent moments, then to move on at a gesture from Sri Aurobindo. What happened next was completely unexpected.

As I stepped into a radius of about four feet, there was the sensation of moving into some kind of a force field. Intuitively, I knew it was the force of Love, but not what ordinary humans usually mean by the term...


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Then, all thought ceased, I was perfectly aware of where I was; it was not "hypnotism" as one Stanford friend later suggested. It was simply that during those few minutes, my mind became utterly still. It seemed that I stood there a very long, an uncounted time, for there was no time. Only many years later did I describe this experience as my having experienced the Timeless in Time. When there at the darshan, there was not the least doubt in my mind that I had met two people who had experienced what they claimed. They were Gnostic Beings. They had realized this New Consciousness which Sri Aurobindo called the Supramental. (Issue dt. July 2000)

(Rhoda P. Le Cocq, describing her experience of the last Darshan of Sri Aurobindo and The Mother on 24 November 1950.)

Courtesy: Auroville Today

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A Sweetest Mistake (Sunanda Poddar)

- Sunanda Poddar

From a Talk to the Children of Arulvazhi School

Born in Africa, Sunandaben came to Pondicherry to meet Mother, as per the wishes of her parents to decide about the place of her medical studies.

It was her dream from her childhood to become a doctor and serve the people of India, particularly in the villages and free of money.

She was just 16 when she met Mother first. She could feel only LOVE, love in abundance and nothing else when she was sitting before Mother. When it was time for her to speak to Mother,


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she made the "Sweetest mistake" in her life by asking Mother whether she could stay at Ashram or to return to Africa, forgetting the purpose of her visit to Ashram. Mother told her to stay at Ashram, as She has already accepted her. Sunandaben was taken care of well since then.

When she was at Golconde, she was in the habit of writing in paper whatever comes to her mind and then throwing them in the waste paper basket, daily. The heaps of torn papers in the dustbin raised curiosity in the mind of the caretaker and the matter was taken to the notice of the Mother.

The Mother, who has gone through the content of the torn papers, called Sunandaben and encouraged her to put whatever comes into her mind, into writings and hand them over to Her (Mother). This practice continued for some time.

One day, after evening meditation Mother called Sunandaben and gave her a pleasant surprise by handing over a new book titled "Stories and Plays" by Sunanda. Thus Mother was the source of inspiration and encouragement to Sunandaben in the field of Story telling.

Mother has also provided her all the opportunities to enrich herself with the knowledge of a medical personnel: by allowing her to work under professional doctors like Dr.Nirodbaran. This way her childhood dream of becoming a doctor also has come true.

Sunandaben narrates certain incidents, where Mother accepts whole hearted unconditional love from all:

1.A family of doctors from a foreign country had Darshan of Mother at Ashram and presented a valuable garland of black pearls. When the family was returning to their country Mother put that garland around the neck of one of the ladies and surprised everybody. Later, when asked about this, Mother told that they were conscious of giving that garland to Mother.

2.Mother voluntarily accepted around Her neck a hand-made jasmine flower garland from a simple Bengali lady who has been


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longing and waiting patiently for a long time (number of days or even months) to put the garland around Mother's neck.

3. At the age of 95 Mother also accepted happily around Her neck a clumsily woven bead mala from a small child who accompanied her parents for darshan and insisted stubbornly that Mother should wear her self-made bead mala around Her neck. (notes taken and written by S. Muthulakshmi)

Courtesy: Sunanda Poddar

(Sunandaben has authored books and plays of fairy-tales for children, has been the caretaker of 'Srismriti', the Mother's Museum, since 1989.)

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"Every step you take you may always ask

for something."

Extracts from an interview with An u Purani by

Anie Nunnally :from the book 'The Golden Path'

Early days in the Ashram

Well, I was just an infant and there was actually not much of an Ashram community at that time and no school. I remember one story that my father told about me when I was still in the crawling stage. My father's quarters were just across from Sri Aurobindo's rooms. The talks with sadhaks would take place in the evenings. The sadhaks meditated also with Sri Aurobindo and perhaps I heard them speaking about meditation. Sometimes, as Sri Aurobindo's room had swinging doors, I would crawl into Sri Aurobindo's room and settle into a chair. My father would come looking for me and apologize to Sri Aurobindo....

***


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Once Mother asked me to dance and in the story I had to conquer the Asura (evil power). The Asura was attracted to me. I found this to be so difficult. Nothing seemed right in the way of dance movements. Usually I hear a sound within my head indicating the correct choreographic movement. It is like a bell inside me. But that bell never rang. I went to the Mother and I started to cry. She then showed me the correct movements Herself. So, I repeated them in front of Her and She said, "Yes, that is it!" She would come to see the dress rehearsals and She saw me on the stage. She asked me to dance again and I thought that was the greatest compliment anyone could receive so I happily danced for Her again.

I remember trembling all over when I saw Mother and Sri Aurobindo on darshan days. Once the Mother asked me, after one of the darshans (Sri Aurobindo was still here at that time), "How was the darshan? For what do you ask? " I said, "Mother, I do not ask anything." She said, "Every step you take you may always ask for something. " So, one day I asked Her if Sri Aurobindo was pleased with me. She said, "Yes. " I asked, "Why doesn't He smile at me?" Mother said, "He doesn't smile, but he is pleased. " This would be the last Darshan that I would have of Mother and Sri Aurobindo together. I could see that Sri Aurobindo was uneasy and uncomfortable. I felt like going quickly. Then He looked straight at me and smiled. His look completely stopped me and I began to cry and cry. Something told me that I would not see Him again. This was November 24, 1950 and of course He withdrew from His body on December 5, 1950.

By 1978 I was fully involved as a teacher at Udavi School -Auroville. I have greatly expanded inwardly from my experience at Udavi... I felt they were all my children. I was so proud of them. I knew some would go to college and one boy even entered the army. It was total/ unconditional love on my part towards them.

Sanjeev Agarwal of SAIIER (Sri Aurobindo International Institute of Educational Research) in Auroville came to see what the children were doing. He saw them acting, dancing, reciting


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and he was impressed. Sanjeev asked me to be the director of the school.

Courtesy: East West Cultural Centre, Culvercity, CA 90230

(Joined as an infant in the ashram, Anu Purani was a dancer, choreographer, writer and teacher at Udavi Village School, Auroville)

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My Birthday Aspiration (Shobha Mitra)

Article by Shobha Mitra, from Awakening to the Beauty of

the Future Issue dt September 2014

I went to see the Mother, taking a bouquet of flowers and the salwar-kameez for Her packed in a pasteboard box. She first took the flowers from my hand and looked at them attentively. She selected some from this bunch to give to me and kept these in Her hand. Then She had a look at the salwar-kameez, at the design and the embroidery and then exclaimed, "It's very beautiful! You have a fine aesthetic sense. Beautiful, my child. Would you like me to wear this for the evening?" "As you wish, Mother," I replied. "Then I will wear it this evening" She said. Then, once again she looked at the salwar-kameez closely and handed over the box to Champaklal-ji. Then She looked at me in silence with a very joyful expression. A little later, She asked, "What would you like from me today? " On every birthday, the Mother used to give us books and toffees. Probably She wanted to know which book I wanted, but this time I felt She was asking the question in a somewhat different way. I, therefore, understood this question from the divine Mother in a much deeper way. I really felt it was the Divine Mother, the Mother of the world, asking me what I wanted on my birthday. Why should I then ask for something very ordinary,


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very material like a book or toffees? So I told Her, "Mother, make me one of the noblest of human beings." Maybe the Mother was not expecting such an aspiration from me. She straightened up in Her chair and very intently fixed Her eyes on me. In Silence. Then taking the birthday card from Champaklalji, She wrote on it:

14-12-1963

"Happy birthday to Shobha!

With my blessings for the realization of your highest aspiration. "

There was another very beautiful quotation on the back of the card:

"The grace is always with you. With a quiet mind, concentrate on your heart. You will certainly get its help and guidance. "

Courtesy: Sri Aurobindo Society

(Shobha Mitra is in the ashram since 1951. She was asked by the Mother to be the French teacher in the School; afterwards organised cultural programmes of the visiting artists and is now looking after the Music Section of Sri Aurobindo International Centre of Education.)

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I surrender, I have no other word to express it (Tekeste)

Extract of Tekeste's words from an article in Auroville Today

(Tekeste came to India at the beginning of 1966 as a diplomat attached to the Ethiopian Embassy in New Delhi. He befriended some people who were brought up in the Sri Aurobindo Ashram.)

They told me about The Mother and Sri Aurobindo and about the new project, Auroville. I told them about my Ethiopian guru Father Woldestensai, a Coptic Christian who, with his exceptional powers, healed thousands of people, the blind, the dumb, the deaf and the mentally ill, in the name of God with prayers and sprinklings of holy water.

* * *

I heard again about Auroville sometime in 1967, when the Ethiopian Embassy received an invitation to participate in the foundation ceremony of Auroville. The Ethiopian authorities told us to participate, but it did not happen for some reason. But we did manage to send some Ethiopian soil and our flag, ensuring a symbolic participation. Knowing already about Sri Aurobindo and The Mother I was eager to see Auroville for myself. I asked the blessings of my guru to visit this spiritual place and asked him to be with me in spirit. I came to Auroville on the 27th February, 1968 one day before Auroville's first birthday celebrations. I participated in the celebrations and somehow I got the holy spirit of the place. I was extraordinarily happy and so inspirited that for about four days I wrote down many important ideas about the future of Ethiopia which the spirit revealed to me. Then the holy spirit inside me asked me, 'How do you feel,' and I said, 'I surrender, I have no other word to express it.'

Contact with The Mother

I had an appointment to see the Divine Mother. But the evening before the appointment something strange happened. I saw a young girl passing by, my thoughts wandered off, and suddenly I realized that the inner light had been switched off. All the happiness was


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gone. I questioned myself what had happened, trying to recall the sweet memory of the earlier days. But a force covered my mind, obliterating the memory. It told me to tear up everything I had written, which I did, and then asked me if I was going to betray my guru, or Mother Mary, or my country's religion? Then, leaving me to my choices, the force kept quiet.

I tried to understand what had happened. I told myself that the spirit that had been with me for four days was an Indian God, and that the one who was talking to me now was the Ethiopian God who wished to save me from this situation. Then I decided not to meet Mother. I told the person who would bring me to Her that I, being an Ethiopian, respected spiritual and old people and that I came here to get a blessing from an old spiritual person, but I had not come here to find God. This was reported to Mother who said that it was a good reaction and sent Her blessings through some rose flowers.

I returned to New Delhi and there, once again, asked myself what had happened to me when I was in the Ashram. Then I realized that the first spirit was the holy spirit, the true light, but the second spirit was the vital power which we call the devil. Then I wrote to the Divine Mother that I had now understood, that I was extremely happy, and that I wished my country to be the second country to support this wonderful idea of Auroville. The moment I posted that letter I felt the true light of the holy spirit coming down once again. I also wrote to the Ethiopian Emperor Hailie Selassie and to my guru. The Emperor replied praising The Mother to carry out such a wonderful project at Her age. My guru answered that all that was revealed to me was from the True Light from the Holy Spirit and he asked me to ask the Divine Mother to pray for him. Soon afterwards Mother sent me Her blessings and expressed that She wanted to see me soon. And indeed I was fortunate to meet Her three or four times a year for the next five years.

On the occasion of my birthday in 1969, I presented the Mother with a gift, a wooden artifact with Mother's photo on one side, Sri Aurobindo's on the other and in between a silver cross. It was


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only much later that I came to know that Mother had spoken to Satprem about this gift (see Agenda IX, P.407, eds.). She said that as soon as She saw this, like an answer in the form of a massive descent, the will came to transform Christianity. She added that the vibration was so powerful that She felt that the transformation was being done. In that same talk with Satprem She explains that the cross is the symbol of transformation, Matter (transversal) penetrated by the Spirit; and the junction is the transformation. Of course I knew nothing of this at the time.

Courtesy: Auroville Today

(Tekeste has served as an Ethiopian diplomat from November 1959 up to August 1993. He is living in Auroville since 1999.)

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* * *


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Fertile memories (Jan Allen)

Extract from the article 'Fertile Memories' by Jan Allen

published on Auroville Today. Issue dt. Jan. 2009

Moving from beach to inland, '73

I remember so well: it was 1st April 1973 when my little daughter Aurojina and I finally arrived in 'Fertile' - to stay. Having sent our belongings ahead by bullock cart, we made the journey from Pondicherry by cycle. It was a cool morning for April, and as I was fuelled by a sense of new beginnings, the journey was memorable. Jina travelled in a wicker seat on the front of the cycle, and we brought with us a little black kitten that rode calmly in its basket at the rear.


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This inland living was to be a leap from our beach house in Quiet, where I had spent the first years in Auroville viewing the experiment from the edge. Aurojina was four and a half months old. Shortly after Jina's birth, the November cyclone of' 72 had driven us into Pondicherry to take shelter in a solid brick house near the Arumugam temple.

I had no doubts about this next venture. We were to be part of a community of eight which would include Johnny, our son Jonas now six years old, Christianne and Denis, Rose and Boris. We were representing America, France and Australia, and I felt a loving appreciation of all these individuals who had mysteriously come together to this odd outpost on this desert plateau in close proximity to the 'Seven Banyan Trees' settlement.

Fertile

In those days there was the wide peripheral sweep of the horizons: the sun rose, shone down relentlessly and set, and the moon was most obvious in all its phases, for we were without the protection and camouflage of tree cover. Boris had come from Gerard's Orchard where he had been under the influence of Mercier, a fervent exponent of organic gardening from New Caledonia, and had already acquired the knowledge and skills to create what would become an impressive vegetable garden, and begin the first orchard in the area. Denis was the interface and fundraiser; he knew how to negotiate with the world at large, writing proposals and fine articles about Auroville. Johnny looked after the practical details, eventually installing the pump maintaining the Kirloskar engine, involving himself in agriculture, and interacting well with the local villagers. The women's work was all encompassing, as it tends to be. It was my maternal year of surrender - so my energy mainly went to Aurojina, who grew into a fine specimen fueled later by the ragi porridge which came from our first ragi crops.


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Halcyon days

In these first months our water was delivered each day by bullock cart from a tank in Aspiration. It was poured into two great barrels and had to be judiciously used. We developed a series of rituals and unspoken rules about this scanty water supply. Our meals were regular and unvarying - ragi and curd for breakfast, rice and dhal for lunch, bread and left-overs for dinner. All meals interspersed with man-size mugs of steaming tea, but chicory in the evenings. Later there were the seasonal fruits from the young orchard.

We took it in turns to cycle the 15 kms into Pondicherry and buy the basics, transporting them on cycle saddlebags. In those days we were still entitled to 'prosperity', which would be distributed at the Banyan tree at the Centre each month by some dignified Ashramites. Through this arrangement were available bed linen, towels, soap, umbrellas (always black), and an almirah (small steel cupboard) on a sort of a ration basis. We managed so frugally, and yet the days were full and our spirits high. There were the occasional care parcels from home... Johnny referred to them as 'the cargo cult'. How we would delight in their luxurious contents and send waves of gratitude and love to the senders, usually our dear parents. It was the Mother's last year. We were living out Her dream cradled in Her care, and we trusted in the moment; halcyon days.

Memorable moments

Then there were the key periods. One of them was initiated the day the diesel engine began to pump water from the bore well; it flowed through the elaborate system of pvc pipes and into the waiting tanks and on to the thirsty earth. This was something to celebrate indeed. Then there was the first lactation of the milk cow after the thrilling arrival of the baby calf. And the successful harvesting of a peanut crop and the first bounty from Boris's vegetable garden.


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There also were the hardships: the thieves, the endless ever-so-hot days, the bad spacing of the monsoon for the dry crops and hence their failure, and the occasional inevitable disputes with our neighbouring Aurovilians. There were the interminable run-ins with the villagers over marauding goats and orchard raiders. 'Our' water also had to be shared with an ever-increasing parade of people, especially during the cashew seasons and in the height of summer. So despite this outlying existence in the then wilderness, it was sometimes difficult to find some peace.

Fertile community expanding

'Fertile' began to expand after a time. Boris and Rose moved out to the east and started their own place (the present 'Nilatangam' settlement), and Denis and Christianne moved a little further away to the west (now 'Dana'). Vijay was a colourful addition to the group, and he began his 'Fertile Windmill' community with a plantation of Mango trees. Every day we continued to use the central Fertile for a communal lunch. Further down the road towards Aspiration, there were Jean and Colleen with Asha, George and Gabby, and later Patrick and Heidi at Fertile East. Aurogreen was to come later.

Rambling castle of bamboo

Johnny had begun his work with roof-maker Ramu and his men. Together they built the first bamboo dome, and we moved into it as a family. At last our home was a dome, but despite having paid tribute to all Buckminster Fuller's ideas and utterances for many years, we found it ever so difficult to live in. There were no cozy corners, no private nooks. Jina, taking her first steps, would hover precariously at the edge of a sunken storage area in the centre. Trying to get settled, we moved our bedding around the perimeter week by week and then finally out OF the door again and into what we called the Big House near the kitchen, that Denis and Christianne had vacated.

And this became our true home for the next ten years. It was a great rambling castle of bamboo, casurina, pakamaram and keet,


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which was constantly added to and subtracted from according to our needs. The dome became a meeting place and PLACE where music was performed and where the Auroville children gathered for their games.

Fertile Forest expanding

In the meantime the project I had drawn up for our besieged forest came true, and money filtered in from the Tamil Fund which enabled the acquiring of a fine bullock cart, a water tank, money for growing seedlings and fencing. Fertile's Forest was now able to expand. In a way it was a learning experience and a testing ground. Now I can see the forest that might have been. Far too many exotics were planted; advice was given from all quarters. Too much use of the seedlings from the nursery. A huge exotic forest was projected, like a great extension of the nursery itself. But it wasn't practical or possible. The 'Avenue of Passion' (Spathoda Campanulata, named 'Passion' by the Mother) was the first to suffer. Too many journeys of the vandi/bullock cart with the water tank were required to keep them erect - one by one they withered. The interspersing of Work trees (Acacia Auriculiformis, named 'Work' by the Mother) saved the day: the indigenous trees could gain roothold in their shade.

Help from Indian Forestry Department

A year or so later, with advice from inspired Forest Officers, we began to make forays into local scrub jungles, as in nearby Marakannam and then further afield, to gather seeds. And in a year the seedlings were ready to plant out in the next monsoon. Joss from Pitchandikulam was the overriding inspiration for these adventures. This interface with the Indian Forestry Department found us in all sorts of remote regions with uniformed men in jeeps. Some wonderful friendships were formed, and important seeds were collected and the forests benefited.

Lively education

Auroville was growing apace. There were now older children hungry for information, who often ended up around the circular


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table at the Fertile kitchen listening to Johnny's marvellous stories. Johnny's patience with children and his inventiveness beguiled enough disciples that a regular school evolved. It began, of course, with our immediate family, which now often included Jesse and Luke, Johnny's sons, visiting regularly from Australia, who brought with them the sophistication from their city life and their burgeoning dramatic skills. It was to stimulate these abilities that the first plays were written and performed in Fertile.

'The school' soon expanded, and graduated from the old round table to a regular classroom by popular demand. Our old chicken house was converted, a grand colourful skylight installed, and the children set about making their own desks from available timber. A blackboard was constructed on request, and over the months there were visiting notables, including Eleanor, who was able to present a living history of the Second World War from her experience on Life Magazine. Prem Malik would occasionally appear for a rallying on the spiritual level with some of Sri Aurobindo's philosophy for junior consumption, and even a torrid account of the Vietnam War from a sensitive veteran. Kalya came regularly for mathematics and introductory information about computers, and then, for light relief, Judith the Puppeteer would wend her way weekly from the Far Beach. Together with her, from accessible materials incredible characters would be created, and soon the travelling Puppet Theatre evolved. There was also the rather unorthodox examination of magic, and there were soon several amateur magicians.

Friends and family

Some parents left India and their children stayed with us for a time. Notable and more permanent among them were our beloved Nell and Isaac. Nell had such an avid appetite for mathematics that Johnny would have to hone up his skills to stay a jump ahead of her, and we had to find more books for her insatiable reading lust. Isaac and Jonas inspired the younger ones with their acquired knowledge of constructing traps and their familiarity with the


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ravines; they also kept diaries that they illustrated, and they filled up many drawing books.

Stefanie, a nine year old German girl, came one day for afternoon tea, nestled into our hearts, and stayed on for six years or so. Occasionally Llewellyn (Nell and Isaac's father) would arrive with marvellous tales to recount of his adventures on the Seas. He was also an authority on the Arthurian legends, and so there were spellbound nights in the big house with the children in their various beds falling asleep to the stories of the knights and their ladies, their trysts and their battles. I think Llewellyn may have invented more characters as these stories continued, thrilling and interminable.

Time of innocence and sweetness

The children at this time were stimulated by simple things and satisfied with their interaction with nature. Perhaps it helped that there were only one or two motorcycles in the whole of Auroville, and there was no television or videos, only the occasional film at Aspiration. This must have given some pertinence to the immediate, for it was innocent fun. Make believe, with wolf games, hiding treasure and making maps, creating bows and arrows, lots of drawing and painting, dressing up, riding and maintaining their horses, which were more often ridden without bridles or saddles. We could spend an hour or so watching the major tragedies of a Mynah bird couple. The invading snake, the inquisitive monkey, the mongoose's journey up the Palmyra for an attempt on their eggs, their ultimate survival. It was always such a delight seeing Stefanie emerging through the Banyans with her long golden hair streaming in the sunlight, and at the helm of a little one-bullock vandi/cart which she plied from Fertile to Discipline and back.

Aliamma, unsung heroine of early days

I must say it would have been impossible to cope with so many without dear Aliamma from Pillaichavadi village, who would arrive punctually at 8 each morning, a little high on betel nut, and throw herself wholeheartedly into sweeping and cleaning. Her face


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would light up with the more the merrier for lunch, so it was in those days that the open house policy evolved. In low times, with Aliamma's help, we could find all sorts of edible wild spinaches in the garden, and with a magical concoction of spices prepare delicious meals which became renowned in Auroville. It was Amma who perfected the dosai with varagu, a sort of hybrid vadai, and her famous version of appalam; she was always ready to experiment. She was an inspiration and a delight, a woman of limitless energy and the unsung heroine of those early days. Then there were our Tamilian mainstays, Kadival from Bommaiyapalalam, Govindraj and Manjini from Pettai, a series of bullock cart drivers. And dear Moonaswami from Kalapet, with his smooth brown legs and his staff, who for so many years despite his age was a constant vigil in the forest. He also had the uncanny ability to determine the existence within - and sometimes gender of- a chicken egg: he did this by holding it to his eye and twisting it while holding it to the sun.

So it was a time of innocence and sweetness. Drugs were an impossible evil, and that generation of children even discouraged beedie smoking. Motor traffic was a distant curse. Fertile was a smoke-free zone, a home away from home, a paradise of endless delights and a haven of peace. I am delighted to have been a part of it all.

Courtesy: Auroville Today

(Jan Allen is an old timer resident of Auroville.)

* * *

We must march

with the quiet certitude that

what has to be done will be done.


The Mother


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Supermind - a force not to be taken lightly (Michael Miovic, M.D .)

- Michael Miovic, M.D.

... Yet even with all these spiritual boons - the revelation of the Divine Mother and a Darshan of Sri Aurobindo on the subtle physical plane, as well as many smaller reminders along the way that I shall not detail here - there remained a doubt lurking in the back of my mind. Like so many others who have read about Sri Aurobindo and the Mother, or perhaps even lived in their Ashram for some time, I was still perplexed by this thing called the "Supermind." What exactly is that? And how is it different from what the great saints and sages of India have already said about Nirvana, Moksha, Self-realization, Atman, and so on. Are all these high-sounding words just different terms for the same thing? Or was Sri Aurobindo's attempt to bring the Supermind down to earth in fact novel? In short, are we dealing with new words for old experiences, or a truly new experience of the Divine?

These questions were answered for me during a visit to the Ashram in January, 1997. One afternoon I went to visit the Matrimandir and entered the sanctum sanctorum with no particular expectations, sat down on the white cushions as usual, and slowly settled into meditation. Whereupon some dark, magnetic force started to pull my whole awareness down into my body. My consciousness went down past the level of blood and organs, down into the trillions of cells circulating through this thing called "me", and down even further through the soup of intracellular proteins that I had studied in medical school, right through the nuclear shell (which, incidentally, in electron micrographs looks like the Matrimandir). When my awareness finally came to rest on the DNA itself, that remarkable double helix that Watson and Crick


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mapped in 1953, suddenly everything turned pulsating golden-orange. A brilliant ray of aureate light shot through the dark passage behind me, up through every level of the physical body and above into the supra-physical planes of existence, and my whole being became pure sunshine. The whole body morphed into a sea of fire to the inner eye, and solar lava of absolute Bliss engulfed every cell, every protein, every minute arc of DNA. Inert matter suddenly became the living power and substance of transcendent God. The ananda (bliss) was so complete and all-consuming that the body sat transfixed, barely breathing, barely moving. And yet I was perfectly aware of being in this so-called "physical" world. I could open and close my eyes and look at the people around me, just as before, but now all was entirely different. Even though the meditation ended at 5 pm as usual and I left the Matrimandir, that golden-orange liquid bliss kept pouring through my body. I went to dinner with my friends in the Ashram and had a few bites to eat, but lost interest because the liquid bliss was more fulfilling. I went up to my room in the Cottage Guest House and lay on the cot, entirely shot-through with solar sunshine; it felt as if I were sitting in the middle of a physical sun, and somehow surviving it. I tried to read, but the bliss was too intense. All I could do was just sit there, pulsating golden-orange bliss and feeling that every physical object around me was also me, that we were all one, gigantic, holy Fire.

The experience went on like that for hours, late into the night. I tried to sleep, but the liquid bliss running in my blood couldn't sleep. So I lay transfixed on the bed until dawn, starting to feel a little feverish. In the morning I went for a jog around town, and still the solar Fire was burning in every cell of my body. I began to feel physically unstable, as if my nervous system were going to collapse. I went to breakfast with my friends at the Ashram's dining hall, and couldn't focus on anything. I was feeling weak and tremulous now, and beginning to wonder, if the infusion of bliss from the Matrimandir might actually kill me. I went back to the room at the Cottage to lie down, but still the solar reaction kept


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burning inside me. Finally, recognizing that I would soon either go mad or die, I prayed to the Mother to end the experience because I simply couldn't bear it anymore. No sooner had I prayed to her than a cool, liberating breeze wafted down on me from above, and I settled into a deep sleep. When I awoke, it was night again, and the solar fire in my cells was gone. I breathed a sigh of relief: thank God it was over. So that was the famous Supermind - a force not to be taken lightly.

In the following week, I visited Auroville a few times, and whenever I set foot there I could feel the golden-orange bliss shooting up from the earth and descending into me from above, and once again I would become a walking, talking, center of buzzing ecstasy connected physically to every object around me by millions of radiating little threads of ananda. Thankfully the experience ceased whenever I left Auroville, as I would not have been able to survive otherwise. But it repeated itself enough times before I returned to the United States that all of my mental doubts about the Supermind were incinerated.

From the Book "INITIATION" Chapter I, Pg 62-64

Courtesy : Sri Aurobindo Society, Hyderabad

(Dr. Michael Miovic. M.D., since completing a fellowship in Psychosocial Oncology at the Dana Farber Cancer Institute, Boston, has been working as an attending psychiatrist there, and has a small private practice as well. He has worked closely with colleagues in the Sri Aurobindo Ashram, India, to develop the field of integral health and consciousness studies.)

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CHAPTER - 5

...And with an Endless Beginnings

From a skit performed @ Bharat Nivas

Narration by Shraddhavan.

This earth is evolving from matter to plant, plant to animal, animal to man and evolution continues. The Indian Mythological concept of the ten avatars amply illustrates this aspect. The next stage is 'supermind.'

The ancient SEERS had visualized the TRUTH, the supermind, but could not proceed further.

"Hiranmayena Pathrena satyasyapihitam mukham Tatvam pushan apavrunu satyadharmaya dhristaye"

(The face of the Truth is covered with a brilliant golden lid: that do thou remove, O Fosterer, for the law of Truth, for sight.)

Sri Aurobindo and the Mother have worked for bringing down the Supermind. Though known in subtler planes, on 29th March 1914, they met each other at Pondicherry.

On 30th March 1914, the Mother wrote :

"...It matters little that there are thousands of beings plunged in the densest ignorance, He whom we saw yesterday is on earth; his presence is enough to prove that a day will come when darkness shall be transformed into light, and Thy reign shall be indeed established upon earth".

Again on September 25, 1914 She wrote;

"The Lord has willed and Thou dost execute:

A new Light shall break upon the earth.

A new world shall be born,

And the things that were promised shall be fulfilled"

- Prayers and Meditations.


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When Sri Aurobindo sacrificed His body on 5th December 1950, His entire YogaShakti has entered into the body of the Mother. The work continued and the First Supramental Manifestation took place on 29th February 1956.This day hence forth was declared as THE GOLDEN DAY OR THE LORD'S DAY.

** *

"The supramental change is a thing decreed and inevitable in the evolution of the earth-consciousness"- Sri Aurobindo (The Mother, Pg-61)

** *

THE SUPRAMENTAL MANIFESTATION UPON EARTH

29 February 1956

(During the common meditation on Wednesday)

"This evening the Divine Presence, concrete and material, was there present amongst you. I had a form of living gold, bigger than the universe, and I was facing a huge and massive golden door which separated the world from the Divine.

As Hooked at the door, I knew and willed, in a single movement of consciousness, that "the time has come ", and lifting with both hands a mighty golden hammer I struck one blow, one single blow on the door and the door was shattered to pieces ".

Then the supramental Light and Force and Consciousness rushed down upon earth in an uninterrupted flow.

The Mother Collected Works of The Mother Vol 15, Pg 94


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On 23rd April, 1956, The Mother wrote the following note:

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We conclude with the following verses of Sri Aurobindo -His vision of the future. From Savitri, book XI, Canto 1.


...The incarnate dual Power shall open God's door,

Eternal supermind touch earthly Time.

The superman shall wake in mortal man

...

Then shall the earth be touched by the Supreme,

...

The being ready for immortality,

...

The Immanent shall be the witness God

Watching on his many-petalled lotus-throne

His actionless being and his silent might

Ruling earth-nature by eternity's law,

A thinker waking the Inconscient s world,

An immobile centre of many infinitudes

In his thousand-pillared temple by Time s sea....


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The supermind shall be his nature's fount,

...

A mightier race shall inhabit the mortal s world.

On Nature s luminous tops, on the Spirit's ground,

The superman shall reign as king of life,

Make earth almost the mate and peer of heaven,

...

Life s tops shall flame with the Immortal s thoughts,

Light shall invade the darkness of its base.

...

Beauty and joy remould her way to live:

Even the body shall remember God,

...

The supermind shall claim the world for Light

...

A greater truth than earth's shall roof-in earth

And shed its sunlight on the roads of mind;

...

In earthly hearts kindle the Immortal's fire.

...

The mind shall be God-vision's tabernacle,

The body intuition's instrument,

And life a channel for God's visible power.

All earth shall be the Spirit's manifest home,

...

An unerring Hand shall shape event and act.

...

This world shall be God's visible garden-house,

The earth shall be a field and camp of God,

...

This universe shall unseal its occult sense,

Creation's process change its antique front,

...

And Nature shall reverse her action's rule,

...

All things shall manifest the covert God,

All shall reveal the Spirit's light and might...


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Even should a hostile force cling to its reign

And claim its right's perpetual sovereignty

And man refuse his high spiritual fate,

Yet shall the secret Truth in things prevail.

For in the march of all-fulfilling Time

The hour must come of the Transcendent's will:

...

Even there shall come as a high crown of all

The end of Death, the death of Ignorance.

...

This too shall be; for a new life shall come,

...

And Truth shall be a sun on Nature's head

And Truth shall be the guide of Nature's steps

And Truth shall gaze out of her nether deeps.

When superman is born as Nature's king

His presence shall transfigure Matter s world:

...

Man too shall turn towards the Spirit's call.

...

The higher kind shall lean to lift up man.

Man shall desire to climb to his own heights.

...

Even the dumb earth become a sentient force.

...

The Spirit shall look out through Matter s gaze

And Matter shall reveal the Spirit's face.

Then man and superman shall be at one

And all the earth become a single life.

Even the multitude shall hear the Voice

...

This earth shall stir with impulses sublime,

Humanity awake to deepest self, ...

Even the many shall some answer make

And bear the splendour of the Divine's rush

...

A heavenlier passion shall upheave men's lives,

Their mind shall share in the ineffable gleam,

Their heart shall feel the ecstasy and the fire.


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Earth s bodies shall be conscious of a soul;

...

Mere men into spiritual beings grow

...

Intuitive beams shall touch the nature's peaks,

...

The Truth shall be the leader of their lives,

Truth shall dictate their thought and speech and act,

They shall feel themselves lifted nearer to the sky,

As if a little lower than the gods.

...

The frontiers of the Ignorance shall recede,

More and more souls shall enter into light,

Minds lit, inspired, the occult summoner hear

And lives blaze with a sudden inner flame

And hearts grow enamoured of divine delight

And human wills tune to the divine will,

These separate selves the Spirit s oneness feel,

These senses of heavenly sense grow capable,

The flesh and nerves of a strange ethereal joy

And mortal bodies of immortality.

A divine force shall flow through tissue and cell

And take the charge of breath and speech and act

And all the thoughts shall be a glow of suns

And every feeling a celestial thrill.

Often a lustrous inner dawn shall come

Lighting the chambers of the slumbering mind;

A sudden bliss shall run through every limb

And Nature with a mightier Presence fill.

Thus shall the earth open to divinity

And common natures feel the wide uplift,

Illumine common acts with the Spirit's ray

And meet the deity in common things.

Nature shall live to manifest secret God,

The Spirit shall take up the human play,

This earthly life become the life divine. "


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Two spirits saved out of a suffering world;

My soul and his indissolubly linked

In the one task for which our lives were born,

To raise the world to God in deathless Light,

To bring God down to the world on earth we came,

To change the earthly life to life divine.

Savitri, pg. 692



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