Songs from the soul

PRAISE AND BLAME

When we depend on the estimation of others, we bring ourselves to their level. Regard for the opinion of people is a help in the lower scale of life, but it is a great obstacle when we would rise higher.

It is the ego in us that hankers for praise -and is afraid of blame. When we seek the aggrandisement of our egoistic life, we try to please others and avoid their criticism. In doing so we may often have to give up the path of truth and accept that of falsehood. Those who would realise truth in their life must give up all. such selfish desire and self-seeking, and must be ready to accept with equality all the consequences of following the truth.

When we feel disturbed by the opinions of others, to that extent our surrender is incomplete, and our dependence on the divine will imperfect. Those who have completely dedicated

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themselves will seek only the satisfaction of the Divine Mother, and disregard what the whole world may have to say of them. Seeking thus only to satisfy the Mother in all our life and action, we shall make our relation so intimate with her that she herself will take up all our actions and use us as instruments for her work jn her own divine way. Then the praise or blame of the world will lose all power to touch us, and we shall be established in perfect peace.and equality.

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SELF-DECEPTION

We are never deceived so badly as when ourselves deceive ourselves. By vigilance we can protect ourselves against deception from outside, but when we deceive ourselves our whole life becomes full of falsehood. We cannot always stand guard on ourselves; indeed our own self may be our worst enemy.

Subtle are the ways in which our nature plays false with us. We think we believe things which we really do not believe. We really believe things which we think we do not believe at all. We pretend to be what we are not; we really are what we pretend not to be. We know things to be wrong, yet somehow justify them to ourselves ; we know things to be right, yet persuade ourselves against them. Under such circumstances truth will have no chance in us. As long as we depend solely on our own mind and intelligence, we shall never be completely free from this dark play of self-deception.

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Our hidden desires and attachments will pull the string from behind and divide our intelligence against itself. We must rise above our egoistic desire-soul and stand on the higher self which is the real truth of .our being. Established in the immutable peace and infinite freedom and absolute purity of our true universal self, we must entrust to the divine Mother our whole nature with all its truth and falsehood, its right and wrong, its good and bad. The only way of escaping from self-deception is to surrender ourselves completely to Thee, Mother Divine.

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PERSONAL RELATION WITH THE
DIVINE MOTHER

Thou hast satisfied all the great demands of my soul, Mother; Thou hast become the centre of my life, my pole star: never, never again shall I go astray.

In Thee I have found the solution of all my doubts, in Thee I have found light in my darkness. The insatiable thirst for. knowledge in me has found an eternal source of illumination in Thyself.

In Thee I have found my heart's delight. Thy grace and sweetness and beauty have filled my whole life with gladness. In allowing me to offer my love to Thee and lay my heart's homage at Thy feet, Thou hast given me the surest means of purifying myself and preparing for the immortal joy of the divine life.

And in serving Thy great cause, Mother, I have found such a scope and field for all

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my power and energy as was beyond even my wildest imagination; and Thou art teaching me the true skill in work.

Thou wilt always shine as the pole star in -the firmament of my life, and with all my heart and soul I shall constantly turn to Thee and follow Thee, until I grow into the light of Thy light, the life of Thy life and become completely identified with Thyself.
Only then will be fulfilled the highest aspiration of my soul.

By submitting to Thee, Mother, I submit to my own highest self, and that is the true condition of freedom. Thou imposest no alien rule or law on me, but makest me find out the true law of my own nature. Thou usest no force or compulsion except that of Thy all-conquering love, which satisfies the inmost needs of my own soul. The more I realise my nearness and identity to Thee, Mother, the more I approach my highest self-realisation.

I feel Thee essentially bound up with all my life. In my work I feel that it is Thy force which works for Thy sake.

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In my joys it is Thy infinite sweetness that flows into me. In my light it is Thy light which dispels all my darkness. I feel no hesitation to bare my bosom completely before Thee; my faults and my merits, my defects and my virtues, are all offered to Thee, Mother. I have nothing to show, nothing to hide. In Thee I find my own true self, and in my true self I find Thee.

Our relation is eternal and immutable. Thou hast created me out of Thy own self, Mother, so that Thou mayest taste Thy own love. Thou sittest in the heart of my heart and guides! me towards Thee. To love Thee and be loved, to approach Thee and be fully identified with Thee—that is the sole purpose in my life, the sole meaning of my existence. By surrendering to Thee, Mother, I fulfil the highest function of my life.

Thou art the source of all my strength, all my inspiration, Mother, Thou art the source of all my life. The more I draw

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upon Thee, the more rich and prosperous becomes my life.

All the true and good and beautiful things in the world are but derivations and reflections from Thee, Mother; they are true with Thy truth, good with Thy goodness, beautiful with Thy beauty. Apart from Thee they are mere shadows, mere misleading appearances. Those who turn away from Thee and ignorantly run after these shadows, they move in endless misery, and lose themselves in the wild desert of life. Thou art the source of all truth and goodness and beauty, Mother, and these must be realised through Thee and Thee alone.

Let me give up all pursuits of the finite, Mother, and tune myself with the infinite; let me turn away from all mere shadows and reflections and resort to the source of all glory and greatness; let me constantly draw upon Thee, Mother, and grow into Thy own divine life. By making Thee my own, I shall become the master of all the glories in the world.

Great must have been my sadhana through innumerable lives, I am now able to approach Thee, Mother,

and be accepted as one of Thy chosen ones. Thy grace has decided to make me an instrument of Thy will, to turn me into a vehicle of Thy manifestation on the earth. My whole being is throbbing with joy at Thy intimate touch within me.

Thou hast occupied my heart, Mother, no one else shall have any more homage from me. Seeking to aggrandise and glorify my ego, I have constantly brought worry and shame on myself; now all my egoistic pursuits are ended I shall no more hanker after any work but shall allow Thy will to work in me; I shall no more ignorantly strive to aggrandise myself, but shall allow Thee to fill my whole being and transform me in Thy own way.

I have taken my absolute refuge with Thee, Mother, and Thou hast taken me under Thy protection. It is for Thee to decide what success'will come to me, what illumination, what delight. I have given my sole charge to Thee, the supreme Mother, and can now rest in absolute peace.

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Thou art seated in the heart of my heart, Mother; to keep my mind and heart and soul always turned towards Thyself is my only sadhana; therein I have found the secret of my true happiness and the surest means of my transformation.

My mind always tends to go outward; there is a restless hankering for movement, for work in my nature. But when I work for my own sake, from personal and egoistic motives, I get more and more entangled. Hence it is that I constantly aspire to be able to work solely for Thy sake, Mother, with Thy force in me, so that in and through my work I may remain
always in touch and communion with Thee.

My heart always hankers after beauty and love, but if I follow the suggestion of the senses, I get more and more entangled, and irresistibly go downward ; hence I pour all my love at Thy feet, Mother, and constantly seek to fill my heart and soul with Thy heavenly charms, so that in and through my love I may realise my identification with Thee, and rise above the
bonds of my earthly nature.

Through all the movements of my nature to come into intimate touch and union with Thee,

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Mother, that is my only sadhana; therein I have found the secret of my transformation.

Thou art the goal of my sadhana, Mother, my sole aspiration is to transform myself into Thy nature and live eternally and consciously in union with Thee.

Thou art the sadhaka in me, Mother; Thou hast descended into me and assumed my bonds and limitations, so that Thou mayest conquer and transform them. I have only to surrender myself and with absolute confidence rely on Thee ; everything else Thou wilt do for me.

Thou art the sadhana in me, Mother; Thou art aspiration in my soul, devotion and love in my heart, light in my consciousness, strength and power in my will; as ineffable joy and sweetness Thou pervadest all my life. My progress in sadhana is the progress of Thy manifestation in me.

Thou callest from below, thou respondest from above, Thou art Thyself the call. Thou art

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my life, thou art my soul, I have no existence apart from Thee. Thou art my sadhana, Thou art my siddhi, thou art my all in all, oh! Graceful, Merciful Divine Mother !

Always to follow Thee, to shape myself into Thy image, always to keep me full of Thyself, to lay my heart's homage at Thy feet, that is my only tapasya, I know nothing else, I have no other rule or principle.

In Thyself, Mother, Thou hast made Truth concrete, real, tangible to us; we can see it, follow it, live it. By identifying myself with Thee, I shall be identified with the Truth ; Thou wilt lift me to Thy own height and give me Thy own status. That is the ideal of my sadhana, Mother; I know no other method or ideal.

That I still commit mistakes and errors, that I still fall into falsehood shows that my sadhana is not yet perfect. When every cell in my body, every idea in my mind, will know Thee and consciously follow Thy will, only then shall I rise above all error, all untruth. My whole being will be turned towards Thee, my mind will

remain filled with Thy light, my heart will remain filled with the joy of Thy intimate touch and the members of my body will automatically carry on Thy work in Thy way—that is the state for which I' am constantly aspiring, Mother.

Thou art the source of all my power, Mother, thou art the source of all my light and happiness. To remove completely all barriers and obstacles that stand between me and Thyself, Mother? that is my strenuous sadhana, moment by moment. The more I open myself to Thee, the fuller and happier I grow in life.

My old nature raised doubts in me, but did not give their solution; created longings and desires, but could not satisfy them ; goaded me on to restless work, but showed no aim or end. Restless, doubtful, burning with unsatisfied longings and thirsts, that is the life, Mother, out of which Thy grace has drawn me out.

Thou hast solved all my doubts; Thou hast convinced me of the hollowness of my egoistic pursuits and desires; Thou hast shown to me

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the real aim and skill in work. To rise above my human ways and to manifest the divine in me through Thy grace, that is the secret, and I have set my whole soul upon it. I have not to deny any of the real heeds and desires of my soul, but have to turn to Thee for their real fulfilment. I have only to discard the falsehood and pretence which hides my true self from me. Drinking deep in the fountain of all joy and light and power, I shall grow into the fullest, the richest, the hap-
piest life.

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NEW BIRTH

We must cut ourselves off completely from our old life and our old habits, and patiently wait in peace and silence aspiring after a new birth in a new life; only then will the higher force descend into us and carry out our transformation.

As long as we keep up a sort of compromise with our old self and our old life, we raise a great obstacle to the working of the higher force in us. Currents and influences constantly enter into us from the life of the race, which tend to keep us bound to the average level of humanity. We must give up all our attachments, cast off our old nature as a worn-out garment or shell, and raise a wall of protection around us, so that nothing from the outside world may touch or affect us; only under these conditions a new nature, a new life will begin to form in us.
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As the caterpillar runs away from its familiar fields of branches and leaves, giving up all its old habitual movements, finds
out a secluded corner^ in some high place far above the ground, and casting a web of protection round itself waits in perfect calm and silence to be turned into a butterfly, even so we must completely retire into ourselves, cut off from the outside world, and in perfect calm and silence seek a new birth, a new life in Thee, other; only then shall we cast off our humanity and realise the divine life for which we are destined.

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