Blessed are those

Never saw but always remember (Rama Narayana)

- Rama Narayana

The whole universe remembers the Mother, because She is the Universal Mother. The whole world remembers Her because She is the Divine Mother. Amongst all I remember Her because She remembers me. Though She is in me and responsible for my becoming I know only when it influenced my surface consciousness. I was then a student of eighth class in 1971. I got the information about Sri Aurobindo and the Mother, got the address of Sri Aurobindo Ashram, Pondicherry and I started writing to Her and receiving blessings. An immense joy was sown into my integral being and the course of my life took a new direction. A back-bencher in the class came to the front. All my attentions gradually turned from external to internal, studying books on spirituality and self development became my passion and sustenance. I learned about integral education and integral yoga; I studied them regularly besides my books on academics. Prayers and meditations became part of my life. The raison d'etre, the purpose of my life became clearer. It revealed before me newer, broader, higher realms which are to be attained. The path appeared ever progressive. Now I feel, remembering Mother can be casual; but it becomes altogether different when She remembers you and takes charge of you. It is like a goldsmith choosing a piece of gold. The piece of gold becomes completely under the control of the goldsmith. He puts it into fire, hammers, chisels, carves and drills until a beautiful ornament is made out of it. I am grateful to be chosen, I remember Her every time I am subjected to a process. Of course, it is difficult to say when I am not a subject. It reminds me of the following from Sri Aurobindo:

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"He who chooses the Infinite has been chosen by the Infinite. "

Synthesis of Yoga, P-53

I was attending Sri Aurobindo Study Circle weekly twice. Then I became instrumental in opening a study circle and its activities, in my teens, in my native village. My participation in Sri Aurobindo Study Circles continued for long time wherever I was there in Odisha till my late thirties. I started participating during my teens in seminars and conferences on Sri Aurobindo's philosophy and education and I still like to do it. Collected Works of the Mother and Sri Aurobindo were my real source of knowledge, inspiration, strength and sustenance and they are still. My nature became Her tool and was subjected to change and transformation. I am grateful to Her for all that She is doing with me and in my being.

In my early twenties, social obligations became stronger on me to go for a job with good salary, to get married to take care of my aging parents and looking after the ancestral property and to do some business. I could not give importance to any of these. Listening to the inner voice and leading an inner life was my soul pre-occupation. The following verse from Sri Aurobindo was pre-dominantly occupying my integral being then:

"Let Fate do with me what she will or can;

I am stronger than death and greater than my fate;

My love shall outlast the world, doom falls from me

Helpless against my immortality.

Fate's law may change, but not my spirit's will. "

Savitri p-432

I could pay least attentions to suggestions, advices, from my parents, relatives and friends. After my college study, I decided to join Sri Aurobindo Integral Education Centre as a teacher. It was a voluntary job. It was my sincere choice. I was receiving Rs.150/- per month to maintain myself. It was a joy to live in a classroom of the school and work tirelessly. Entire day and night was dedicated towards the chosen work. The entire being was

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charged by Her energy and consciousness. Her voice and inspiration from within were the only things to be heard and lived up to. The work of teaching and all ancillary works of the school were my sadhana. I dared to consent to take the responsibility of a Principal of another Sri Aurobindo Integral Education Centre at the age of twenty one. It was fully clear to me that She will be guiding me at every step of any job provided to me to deliver. I need not to be worried; after all, it is Her work and we are the instruments. Gradually it became clear that I came down upon earth as a being through my human parents, but I do not belong to them. I am a part of this humanity upon earth irrespective of the country in which I am born. The narrowness of religion and the caste and sub-caste of my parents did not interest me. Neither had they bound me.

I grew with the children (students) and teachers of Sri Aurobindo Integral Education Centres in Odisha. I became the Principal of three different Integral schools in different times at the time of their need. It was also a need for my progress. I learnt a lot from students and their parents, colleagues, managers and different officials while leading the schools. The outputs from the educational experiments, done then are still effective today after 30 years. The following statement of the Mother became a mantra for me:

"It is not for our family, it is not to secure good position, it is not to earn money, it is not to obtain a diploma, that we study. We study to learn, to know, to understand the world, and for the sake of the joy that it gives us. "

June 1967/CWM Vol-12

During the third year of my teachership I became very interested to learn and experience the Free Progress system of education. I lived two years in Sri Aurobindo Ashram, Delhi Branch and worked in Mirambika dedicated to Free Progress. I got a glimpse of it by living in that conducive atmosphere. I am grateful for having given me the opportunity. Since then my insight and

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approach to education, life and world got properly orientated - as I believe.

It is worth noting that the Shramashibira programme visualized and pioneered by Prof. Chittaranjan Das (Chittabhai) in Odisha geared me to work for the society in true spirit. The programmes are happening twice a year each for ten days in any one of the integral schools or institutions dedicated to the ideals of the Mother and Sri Aurobindo. More than a hundred of participants (sometimes more than two hundred) live together for ten days. They study together any one of the works of the Mother or Sri Aurobindo for four hours, physical labour offering for four hours and open discussion for two hours per day. This programme has led us deep into the teachings of the Mother and Sri Aurobindo and helped us to do yoga in the world while leading an ordinary life. As Sri Aurobindo says in His aphorism:

No. 107 - "Hard is to be in the world, free yet living the life of ordinary men; but because it is hard, therefore it must be attempted and accomplished".(CWM- Vol 1O-Pg l94)

This aphorism became another mantra for me till today to lead life in the world for Her. Mother's explanation with questions and answers on this aphorism, the essence and consciousness that is conveyed by this aphorism penetrated to the depths of my being. The cells of my body resonate with this. It makes me free from the result of the work that I do. Thus every work becomes an aid for inner growth. I was one of the executive body members in the "New Life Education Trust" (named by the Mother), Odisha for a period of twelve years. It was an opportunity to do Her work with a wider perspective through all the hundreds of Sri Aurobindo Integral Education Centres and study circles in Odisha. Prof. Prapatti and Sri Ramakrishna Das (Babaji Maharaj) being the instrumental leaders.

I got married in 1993 with Uma, who was also a teacher in one of the Integral Schools. Our marriage was an act of battle against present social institutions as stated by Sri Aurobindo in His following statement:

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that She was with us. Financial and material requirements followed us though we did not have enough resources to support ourselves. We were literally happy in spite of uncertainty of a house and finances as if we were not affected by the absence of money or its affluence. We were showered by Her grace to experience the following words of Sri Aurobindo for some stretch of time.

"The ideal Sadhaka in this kind is one who if required to live poorly can do so live and no sense of want will affect him or interfere with the full inner play of the divine consciousness and if he is required to live richly, can so live and never for a moment. ...

... "The Divine Will is all for him and the Divine Ananda. "

In due course of time funds were arranged for a house in Auroville. Certainty in living in Auroville, to become Her instruments in realization of the Dream became clear. I joined Auroville as a science teacher in Transition school. Later I got an opportunity to see the functioning of Auroville with a wider view by working in SAIIER and being a participant in different working groups.

Now I am passing through a phase where the following appears very significant:

"Nothing could satisfy but its delight:

Its absence left the greatest actions dull,

Its presence made the smallest seem divine. "

Savitri-Pg 305

(Rama Narayana came to Auroville in 2001. He has been working in the administrative team of Sri Aurobindo International Institute of Educational Research (SAIIER) since March 2007.)

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