Esha's recollections of some episodes of her life, as narrated to Nirodbaran in Bengali, who translated it in English. This is presented here in form of a book.
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Nirodbaran on Esha's story : Esha, the late Dilip Kumar Roy's niece, was a little girl visiting the Ashram when I came to know her through my niece Jyotirmoyee with whom she had become very friendly. She wanted to settle in the Ashram, but her mother did not want it as she was still a minor. When after many years she came to the Ashram again and stayed with Sahana Devi, I became more closely acquainted with her. By that time she had already married and obtained her divorce and had decided to settle here. I came to her help and made all possible arrangements for the purpose. Since then I have come to know her well and listened to her narration of the incidents of her life. As I found them interesting I began to note them down and was thinking of publishing them in Mother India when somehow she got wind of it and strongly objected to it. As I felt I had Sri Aurobindo's sanction for it, I did not listen to her. In spite of my disregarding her objection, luckily she did not stop recounting her saga. Of course she narrated it in Bengali and later I put it down in English as faithfully as I could. When the story began to appear in Mother India, she insisted more than once that I should stop it. My answer was that I believed it could be helpful to many readers and that Sri Aurobindo seemed to support me.
THEME/S
I remember the last scene of my father's life. He had fallen ill. He must have known he would not recover. A few days before he left his body I saw him sitting with folded hands before our Ishta Devata in the Thakur Ghar (Pooja room). It surprised and moved me greatly. A few days later he passed away peacefully.
Let me relate one Iast story in his life and finish my ties with him in this world. Once a widow came to him carrying a child in her arms. She said, "I am indeed very poor, I seek your help for this fatherless child." Those few words were enough to melt Father's heart. After he had helped her for a year, an unbelievable thing happened. Father received a letter signed by an advocate on behalf of this woman. She alleged that he was the father of her child. Hence, she claimed half the share of his property. If her legitimate demand was rejected, she would file a suit. My parents fell from the skies, as we say in Bengali. Could anyone be so ungrateful as to fabricate such a lie? Mother got a chance again to admonish Father and said, "How many times have I told you not to be so generous? There is no end to people's evil designs and no limit to their lies. They are extremely clever in duping their benefactors. But when have you listened to me?" Father heard her quietly. It was unthinkable to him that people could be so deceitful and ungrateful. However, he said, "Let her do as she pleases. I shall see this through to the end." Father's friends were all on his side and promised to stand by him. "We won't tolerate this calumny. We will drive away this woman from our locality," they assured him.
I do not know the details of how the matter ended. But the woman did leave the place and was never seen there again. Such people make me wonder how greed can drive one to such folly. But what I want to say by relating this incident is that Father was a simple-hearted man, candid and always ready to help others in distress. He made a rule in the house that once a month he would feed the poor and the destitute. This he observed till the end of his days. Besides, before his midday meal, he would send a servant to enquire if in the neighbourhood anyone remained unfed. If any was found, he would have food sent to him and only then would he sit down to whatever was there for his meal. And yet he professed he did not believe in God. But to my mind it mattered little. For there was a lot of godliness in him.
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