Esha's recollections of some episodes of her life, as narrated to Nirodbaran in Bengali, who translated it in English. This is presented here in form of a book.
Sri Aurobindo : Contact
Nirodbaran on Esha's story : Esha, the late Dilip Kumar Roy's niece, was a little girl visiting the Ashram when I came to know her through my niece Jyotirmoyee with whom she had become very friendly. She wanted to settle in the Ashram, but her mother did not want it as she was still a minor. When after many years she came to the Ashram again and stayed with Sahana Devi, I became more closely acquainted with her. By that time she had already married and obtained her divorce and had decided to settle here. I came to her help and made all possible arrangements for the purpose. Since then I have come to know her well and listened to her narration of the incidents of her life. As I found them interesting I began to note them down and was thinking of publishing them in Mother India when somehow she got wind of it and strongly objected to it. As I felt I had Sri Aurobindo's sanction for it, I did not listen to her. In spite of my disregarding her objection, luckily she did not stop recounting her saga. Of course she narrated it in Bengali and later I put it down in English as faithfully as I could. When the story began to appear in Mother India, she insisted more than once that I should stop it. My answer was that I believed it could be helpful to many readers and that Sri Aurobindo seemed to support me.
THEME/S
One day, I had a good reason to be happy, and as soon as Nirod-da entered my place, I exclaimed: "Today I shall give you a very good piece of news. You know X who looks after me and helps me in so many ways?" Then I launched into my anecdote.
When she came yesterday morning I offered her some prasad, saying, "Take this. It is Sri Krishna's prasad."
"No, Didi, I won't. I don't take any prasad other than the Mother's and Sri Aurobindo's."
"You won't take Sri Krishna's prasad?" I asked, a little taken aback. With a definite "No!" she departed without a second word. I was a bit hurt.
Early this morning she came, as she usually does, and excitedly cried out: "Didi, I had a strange experience while coming to you just now. You know that little bridge just before your house which is under repair? When I was crossing it, suddenly I lost my vision and became blind. Then a voice came out of my throat, `Kanhaiya, where are you? Where are you? Show me the way, show me the way.' I was calling Sri Krishna and at the same time thinking, 'Why am I calling him, with whom I had nothing to do? And why Kanhaiya, a Hindi expression?' Then after two or three calls, suddenly a bright light, a blend of blue and gold, flared up. It came like a brilliant column from your house and fell before me, the entire area shining in that dazzling light. Then I heard a voice, Why are you going in that direction? Kanhaiya is in that house from where the light is coming. Go there!' I was struck with wonder. I have never called him in my life and here I have this extraordinary experience of him!"
You can imagine my euphoria. Sri Krishna has been my Thakur since my childhood.
Let us leave aside His Lila and come to the facts of my life.
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